Gift from beyond
by JustAWriterWannaBe
Summary: The late Mike Royce has a gift for his friend Kate Beckett and delivers it from beyond the grave.
1. Introduction

**Introduction**

* * *

_**Author's Notes:**_  
Thank you for reading my story, I hope you enjoy it.  
It takes place somewhere early in the fifth season time frame.  
No particular reference points needed.  
No spoilers.  
By all means, please leave me feedback/reviews on this or any of the other stories I've posted here.

* * *

_**Story Notes:**_  
This started out as a mish-mash of ideas in one big file. I finally figured out how to distill it down to this. These three key ideas have been simmering in my brain for a long time, since right after I wrote my first FanFic, and I just had no idea what to do with them until now.

**_The three key ideas were/are:_**  
1) Kate getting recognized and gushed over as Nikki Heat in front of her father.  
2) Kate doing some reminiscing about Royce to Rick.  
3) (In an effort to avoid a spoiler, let me say "The gift that Royce left Kate.")

* * *

And lastly, I stole... er... borrow... um... plagiarized... the idea of Kate's Nana (Beckett) and the family gatherings from the delightful story  
"Precious Things" by The Little Monster 1024  
because I just think the character(s) were nice and well developed and she did a damn good job.


	2. The surprise visitor

It had started out to be like any other day. Kate Beckett arrived early and was hard at work cleaning up old files and making sure things were in order.

Castle appeared much later than usual but cheerful and, as he always was, coffee in hand "Good morning! Your coffee Detective Beckett."

"Thanks Castle. Any later and it'd be lunch time." taking the cup and feeling the welcome warmth as she takes her first sip. "So, how'd your meeting with that guy go?"

"It went pretty well, nothing exceptional. They're trying to gear up to put the Derrick Storm graphic novels on the shelves in Japan and he is trying to swing a special deal where he can get some of them in English for the true hard-core collectors." He explains.

"That's nice. They going to drag you over there for a visit too?" She asks. "If they do, I'll need to put in for a hardship leave. You don't do so well when dealing with jet-lag when you get home and I'm sure this one would be a doozey."

"No visits mentioned yet or at least Paula didn't bring any up. I'm not sure Black Pawn wants to be bypassed with the request either so we'll see."

Beckett smiles at him and returns to her work with only a gentle nod acknowledging his explanation.

"So, what's on today's agenda?" Castle asked settling into his chair.

"You may want to cover your delicate ears, I'm doing _paperwork_." she smirks saying the last word in a whisper.

"Have I told you that you have a mean streak?" he asks rhetorically.

"I seem to remember you doing so but I think you were cuffed to the bed at the time." She whispers to him.

"Alrighty then! Let's change the subject!" Castle sits back, smiles and takes a drink of his coffee.

"Why? You're the one who started it."

"Okay then, I'll just accept defeat now and make it easy on you. You win." he says looking straight ahead and drinking his coffee.

"It's so much easier when you do it that way." she sniggers.

"Yeah..." he says under his breath.

"I'm sorry, did you say something?" she asks without looking up from her desk.

"Um. Yeah, I was wondering what the weather will be today."

"Riiiiiigght!" she says drawing it out, clearly telling him she doesn't believe him. Her attention turns to her ringing desk phone. "Beckett" she says with her usual flat business tone. "Seriously?" ... "You've got eyes on him and you're positive?" ... "Sure, okay, yeah, I know him, send him up. Thanks." With a face expressing a great deal of confusion, Beckett turned to look at Castle for a moment.

"Oh crap. Whatever's wrong, I didn't do it." Castle says holding up his hands like he's going to deflect a series of blows.

"No. That was the front desk. They're sending up a visitor." she says as she stands up still lost in thought, hardly focusing on him and heading for the elevator.

Quickly following her Castle's hooked "Who? Someone important? Is it related to a case?" he starts rattling off possible answers while following her to the elevator. "Come on Beckett!" Castle whines.

Just then the elevator dings and the doors open to reveal L.T. escorting Gene Simmons, the two chatting away.

"Hello Mr Simmons!" Beckett says reaching out for his hand.

"Hello again Detective, you're a sight for sore eyes. As I said before, please call me Gene." The singer says leering at her in his 'trademark' style.

"Hi Gene!" Castle says also shaking his hand.

"Hello again Rick, nice to see you again." he says with a flourish. "I'm sorry to be abrupt but I'm on a schedule, can we talk for a couple of minutes?"

"Sure, please call me Kate, right this way we can use this room..." Kate offers directing him to the conference room.

Castle thanks L.T. for the escort and follows the two into the conference room.

"So Gene, what can we do for you?" Beckett asks.

"You can take this case from me." he says plopping a briefcase on the table with a thump and a smile. "I found this a couple of weeks ago. Since I knew I was coming out here I thought I'd deliver it myself. Which also gave me the chance of having it x-rayed at the airport to make sure there were no surprises in it since I don't have a key to open it."

Beckett looks at Castle and then back at the case. "Why?" is all she can get out when Gene continues "It was Mike Royce's and based on what I know about you and the business he was in, I suspect that he'd rather have this in your hands than in the hands of his family members who may not understand its contents."

"Oh." Beckett says putting a hand on the well-worn briefcase, somewhat overwhelmed by the sudden onrush of emotions and memories that it brought back to her.

"Thanks very much Gene," Castle says, picking up for Beckett "I don't know if you know the back story, Mike was Kate's training officer, he taught her the foundation that made her one of New York's finest."

Simmons smiles and says "I don't doubt it for a minute. Mike did tell me about being friends with a cop from out here before his life went into a tailspin. He did say he was sorry about how he left it with her. I assume that he was speaking of you Detective. When we first met I wasn't aware that it was you."

"Uh...oh... sorry, yes," she says regaining her composure "Mike and I were good friends. Sadly, I'm the one that sent him into that tailspin. I was the one that arrested him which caused him to lose his P.I. license which killed his bounty hunting business all of which sent him out to L.A." Beckett explains.

In a more mellow voice than he normally uses, Gene tells her "Y'know, I didn't get a lot of time to talk to Mike but we did have a few occasions to sit around the pool and drink and from what he told me, I don't think he blamed you for that tailspin. He made it sound like he went into something with his eyes wide open and turned out to have done something, in his words, monumentally stupid." Simmons continues "He didn't have that, _someone done me wrong_, type of attitude, he was much more upset with himself for what he did and what he caused. It was obvious he knew _he_ made the mistake and hurt people, people he cared about a lot. He took his punishment and was trying to rebuild his life and mend relations."

With a wry smile on her face, Beckett turns to the singer "Thanks for telling me that. I still feel bad about what had to happen."

Just then Karpowski comes into the bull-pen and sees Beckett in the open conference room talking to a stranger. She walks in "Hey Beckett, sorry to interrupt, they said it was important, this just got sent up to you from the good folks over at the car theft division." she says handing Kate a folder. She turns to look at the tall man next to her and ... well, that was when bottom fell out. The screech Karpowski released must have been heard across the state. The thud when she collapsed onto the floor must have registered on seismographs. The look of surprise on everyone's face was offset only by the instinctive reaction of a room full of cops to such a scream who all jumped up from their desks in anticipation of some unknown adversary as they put their hands on their weapons. The only person not affected by the commotion was Simmons himself.

Beckett immediately went to Karpowski's aid. The Captain's door got flung open with a bang as she strode out to investigate the commotion. **"What the hell's going on in here?"** she yells with her most authoritative voice. She sees her detective on the floor then looks straight at Castle only a couple of feet away from where Karpowski stood **"Mister Castle, what the hell happened here?"**

"Castle didn't do anything Captain!" Beckett tries to explain. Just then Simmons turns to face the authority figure in the room, the Captain, and gives her what seems to be his de facto greeting of leering at women and saying "Well hello there!"

Beckett and Castle immediately visualize the next morning's newspaper headlines _"Rock Icon Gene Simmons beaten to an inch of his life by pissed off police captain."_ but to their surprise, the Captain turned into a twelve-year-old fangirl. "**You're Gene Simmons!**" she says pointing at him, her eyes as big as hubcaps.

"Yes I am, tongue and all." he replies slyly. He's obviously had lots of practice with this. He reaches out his hand to greet the Captain who's _**STUNNED**_ at meeting him and stares at his hand. Slowly, timidly, she reaches out and shakes his hand all the while wearing a wide grin on her face.

Beckett and Castle exchange looks of surprise to see the Captain, standing there staring wide-eyed as she releases the star's hand but continues to stare at him.

Just then Karpowski starts to moan as an EMT from one of the other floors arrives to check on her.

The EMT kneels down next to her, between the groggy detective and the singer. As Karpowski begins to come around, the EMT begins to try and assess what happened. Roselyn, Roselyn! _Karpowski_!" he calls out trying to bring her to. "**Talk to me!**" he urges loudly as he begins trying to triage the supine figure. "Can anyone tell me what happened?" he asks.

"She saw ... a star she was a fan of and she screamed and passed out." Beckett offers standing up to let the EMT have space.

"Seriously?" he asks incredulously. "Did she show any signs of problems before it happened?" The EMT asks, trying to collect as much data as he can.

"Nope, that was it. She was fine, then had a fangirl moment and passed out." Castle says.

Beckett, seeing that Karpowski was in good hands, went around to Simmons and offered to move him on "Gene, we'll take care of her. Thank you very much for bringing me that case and sorry for the excitement."

"Kate, before I leave, let's have a little fun if you don't think it will be too much. Got a camera or camera-phone handy? Seeing her reaction, maybe we can give her a treat." The singer says with a mischievous grin.

"Jonesie, do you think she's okay?" Beckett asks the EMT.

"Seems so, she'll be able to stand in a minute, I'm just double checking her vitals. She seems to have a strong heartbeat." The EMT responds.

Hearing this, Gene, goes around him and kneels down next to Karpowski and offers to help her up while Castle, has his phone recording a video of it. The look on Karpowski's face when she realizes who's helping her up is almost as ludicrous as the look the Captain had. She stands finally and he leans down and gives her a quick peck on the cheek. "I'm glad to see you're okay, I don't like it when my fans abandon me like that."

"Hum..um...um...you... Oh god, I feel woozy again." Karpowski says as she stumbles off balance pushing the singer into a chair and landing on his lap like a kid on Santa.

Feeling the moment, he decides to play along "Ho ho ho, Well Roselyn, have you been a _bad_ girl?" he says with a leer.

She turns to his face and is grinning wildly and starts to gush "For you I'll be good **and** bad! Oh my god, I can't believe I'm _actually_ talking to you. My sister won't believe this! You and your band got me through so many rough nights in college. Thank you!"

"Well Roselyn, look over at that camera there and smile!" he says pointing to Rick.

Suddenly feeling foolish, she starts to stand up but quickly turns and gives him a kiss on the cheek before doing so. "I'm so sorry for what happened."

"Think nothing of it." he says seeming genuinely pleased with the fun.

"Captain." Castle announces "Your turn, no reason you can't get in on the fun for a moment."

Beckett stares at him terrified and starts to emphatically make the 'cut' motion across her neck.

"Oh, that wouldn't be appropriate." the Captain says but obviously thrilled at the idea.

"No, nonsense, come on over here." Simmons says waving her over as he stands next to her and gets his picture taken with her.

From behind the camera, Castle calls out "Captain Victoria Gates, please meet Mr Gene Simmons" which triggers the automatic reaction of her turning to him and shaking his hand while grinning like a fool at the camera.

Beckett stares at the scene playing out and wonders if Castle's feet will get to touch the floor when Gates has him bodily thrown out of the station.

"Okay, I've got it!" Castle announces as he ends the recording. "Karpowski, and" turning to the Captain "Captain Gates, I'll forward this to you in a few minutes."

Beckett uses this as an opportune time to end the circus. "Mr Simmons, Gene, thank you for bringing the case to me and thank you for coming in today. And... I guess, thanks for the impromptu fan moment." she says smiling at him and shaking his hand.

"Beckett, I'll take care of escorting him out if you want." Castle offers.

"Yes, thank you." Beckett says.

Turning to the people in the room, the singer offers his departure "Captain Gates, pleasure to meet you." as he shakes her hand. "Roselyn, thank you for the wonderful greeting." he offers as he shakes her hand again.

"Right this way Gene." as Castle leads him to the elevator chatting away.

"Well Detective Beckett," the captain starts "this has been an interesting interlude. I wasn't aware that Mr Castle knew Mr Simmons. Why is he taking visitors here?"

"Actually, he came to see me. We met when I was in L.A. a while back. This briefcase belonged to a mutual friend and Gene was in town so he delivered it to me."

"So you're telling me, you" pointing at her "and Gene Simmons" now pointing at the departing star "are on a _first name_ basis?"

"Yes sir. I guess so." Beckett replies sheepishly.

"Detective, one day, you're going to _have_ to tell me this story. Meanwhile, Detective Karpowski, are you alright?"

"I think so sir." she says still rubbing the back of her head.

"Captain, she's got a bump on the back of her head where she hit the floor but it's not too bad. Otherwise, she seems to be fine. I would suggest that she see a doctor promptly just to make sure there's no other problems." Jones explains.

"Thank you Jones." she says snapping back into her all-business demeanor.

Turning back to Karpowski, "Detective, grab your bag, Jones, would you escort her to the local E.R. to get her checked out? Have a squad car drive you two over and then bring you back when you're done."

"Yes Captain." Jones says as he heads over to help the detective up and escort her to her desk to a raucous round of applause.

Turning to Beckett, "Detective Beckett, is that briefcase related to an existing case?"

"Not directly sir, it actually seems to be a personal item from a previous, now closed case. The mutual friend, was killed here in New York and I closed the case. He had left it at Gene's, I mean Mr Simmons' house. It's locked and no one knows what's in it. I'll open it later at home." Beckett explains.

"Okay, then. I guess we can all get back to work now." Gates says loudly so that everyone can hear her order.

"Yes Sir." Beckett acknowledges as the Captain turns on her heel and quickly heads towards her office.

"Oh, and Detective," Gates says pausing to look back "I really _would_ like to hear that story one day."

"Yes Sir." Beckett says to the retreating captain. "Sheesh, what a way to spend the day." Beckett thinks to herself walking over to take the briefcase back to her desk. Sitting down and looking at the case on the floor at her feet she quietly says "So Mike, what'd you leave? I still wish you'd talked to me before it all came crashing down."

Beckett was so lost in thought she didn't hear Castle return to the desk. "Hey partner, you okay?" he asks quietly.

"Yeah, I'm feeling okay, just thinking about Mike again." she sighs.

"Do you want to open it now or wait until tonight?"

"I... I don't think I know for sure." Beckett answers staring at the case.

Castle leans in and whispers, "Kate, I'll offer you company if you decide you want someone around when you open it. All you have to do is say so."

"Thanks Ri.. Castle. I might take you up on that. Let me ponder it for a while." she said in a voice that to anyone else would have been a simple statement but Castle knew better.

"I'll also make you an offer that you may prefer." he starts.

"Hmmm?" she questions looking up at him.

"I could take it home and keep it in my office for you. You can open it some other time when you feel the urge. I think whatever's in there will keep until you're ready to deal with it."

She lets out a deep breath at the idea of being able to hold off on opening it. She knows, as long as she sees it she'll want to dive in and find out what's in there. "That's a good idea Castle." then sitting back and looking at him "You know, you're not nearly as clueless as your ex-wives have been saying." she says returning to her 'normal' self.

"My ex... do you mean... What? _plural?_... You've been... When did you... Don't take their word... What... Who... What'd they say?" Castle sputters.

"I almost feel mean about doing that to you, it's really _too_ easy. It's like encouraging a puppy to chase his tail." Beckett says smiling wide.

"Got me again eh? Well Detective, you'll get your's one day." Castle says sitting back in his chair.

"Wow, great come-back Mr Writer!" she says with a little chuckle "Let me write that one down for prosperity." she says picking up a pencil and making a writing motion on her desk.

"Great, stepped into it again." he says standing up but still smiling. Picking up the briefcase, "Why don't I take this now and drop it off in my office while you do that cop stuff you do." he smirks, waving vaguely at the things on her desk.

"Good idea. Thanks." she smiles back at him "Don't forget to send those videos to Karpowski and Gates."

"I'll do it while I'm in the cab heading home. Now, if you'll excuse me for a little while I'll get going."

"Thanks for taking care of that for me, and ... looking out for me." Kate says.

Castle replies with a wink as he turns and heads for the elevator.


	3. At the crime scene

A little while later, long after Castle got on the elevator, between handling the stacks of files, Kate sits back in her chair and stares off into space. "I _knew_ I shouldn't have let him talk me out of it." She thinks to herself. Kate Beckett wasn't one to be talked out of much so, in the rare instances when it happens, she questions herself, _a lot_. "I should have pried it open to see what's in it." she continues reprimanding herself.

"Hey Beckett." she hears from behind her.

"Yo Espo, what's up?" she responds as she turns.

"Do you think Castle caught that introduction with Gates on tape? No one's going to believe her reaction without proof."

"Hmm... I don't think so. Sorry." then thinking to herself for a moment "Yeah, that was ahhh..."

Ryan interrupts by whistling the theme from the Twilight Zone.

"Exactly!" both Esposito and Beckett say simultaneously.

"I just wished he'd had Karpowski's scream on film, that'd be priceless. We could use that on her for ages." Beckett says laughing to Ryan.

"That'd make a great ring-tone for when the captain calls." Esposito offers.

"That scream was pretty bizarre. Reminds me of the ghost stories my grandmother would tell me about the banshees." Ryan murmurs looking off into space.

Esposito is just starting to stand up to bop Ryan off the head with a pad of paper when his phone rings. "Esposito." ... "Right" ... "Got it, thanks." He hangs up the phone and announces "Break-time over children, we've got a body." as he grabs his coat.

The other two detectives spring into motion, grabbing notebooks, coats, phones, keys and heading for the elevator. "I'll text the address to Castle" Esposito offers.

"The sad thing is, those videos aren't going to have much blackmail value. For Gene Simmons, I'm sure that was a pretty tame fan moment." she muses as the doors to the elevators close.

* * *

A short while after the detectives arrived, Castle appears on the scene with another two coffees in hand.

"Detective Beckett! Here's another coffee to brighten your day." He says handing her a coffee.

"Thanks Castle. I need this."

"Anything you need, you just let me know." He says with a sly smile.

"Castle. Crime scene. Cut it out." she admonishes with a smile and a glint in her eyes.

"Cutting it out Detective." he responds as he attempts to rein in his urges. Looking around the scene, he asks "So what's the story here?"

"The story is your problem Mister Writer Man." Kate says with a playful edge. "The facts are mine. The facts are this seems to be a fairly straight-forward shooting. Simple argument between two people that used to be friends. This guy here with the extra ventilation lost. The guy over there with the bloody shirt, he didn't lose. The decision seems to have been made by Colonel Colt on the ground over there. It seems that the first point made by the Colt was the one that ended the discussion, the others were superfluous punctuation."

"Ouch."

"According to Lanie, 'ouch' wasn't an issue after the first period was placed."

"Very nice metaphor Detective."

"Thank you Mr Castle. You seem to be rubbing off on me."

"Detective?" he says raising his eyebrows.

Beckett looks up slightly from her notebook and stares off into space and says "That didn't sound right did it?" pauses then snaps "**Castle!**"

"What? Sorry, I got lost in thought just then." he says with a wicked grin.

Giving him a cold look through narrowed eyes "Aaannnnyyyyway... Doctor Parish is over there taking a blood sample from the suspect. The guy didn't even bother lawyering up, he even signed the release willingly after we read him his rights. Ryan and Espo volunteered to do the canvas themselves looking for witnesses. Where this is a small side street in a working-class neighborhood, we might have to do a canvas later on to look for people who might have gone to work before the final part of the fight."

"His lawyer is going to have his hands full."

"Well, I don't mind an easy one occasionally." she says then after a short pause "Don't say it Castle!" catching him just about to speak "I think we're done here." she adds turning and heading for her car.

During the ride back, Castle is looking out the window saying nothing and Beckett keeps looking at him "Castle, stop it, I can hear the gears turning from here."

"For a change, I wasn't going there. Not that don't want to go there, I just wasn't thinking about it this time. I was just thinking about how, what seems like a simple disagreement between two people, friends even, ends with one killed and one killer." pauses "However, now that you mention it... I ... um..." looking wistfully off into space.

"Castle!"

"What?" He says snapping back into the moment.

"Stop that!"

"You started it! And don't tell me you could hear what I was thinking that time!"

"I know you well enough to know what thought was ricocheting around in that empty gourd of yours."

"Empty?" Hey says acting hurt.

"How about temporarily devoid of blood?" she smirks.

"Funny. Very funny." he says to her, turning to look out the window again "but more accurate." he says under his breath.

Smiling, she continues driving back to the precinct.


	4. Assembling the pieces of the puzzle

Exiting the elevator, our favorite crime-fighting duo, head for her desk.

Ryan calls out "Hey Beckett, your suspect is in the box. He's got a lawyer already."

"How'd that happen?" she sighs.

"It seems his lawyer is a friend and saw him downstairs."

"Oh well." Putting her coat on her chair "Castle, why don't we go have a chat with him?"

"Right behind you detective."

Opening the door to the interrogation room abruptly, Beckett dives right in "Counselor, sorry to see you wasting your time on this one. We've got an admission and his blood is in the lab now."

"Detective. I'm Mr Prentice, I represent this man. My client was in shock when he was questioned. He couldn't understand his rights."

"Counselor..."

"We're not going to answer any questions right now, I just got started and I'm still consulting with my client. You'll need to give us a few more minutes."

"Okay Castle, we're done for now." she says turning around.

"Just like that?"

"Just like that. He's not going anywhere for a while." as they step from the room.

"I'll get us some coffee. It's almost been two whole hours since your last." he says with a slight grin.

"Thanks."

Sitting at her desk, Kate Beckett exhales a long breath and gathers herself and begins her paperwork on this, her most recent arrest.

"Thank you." Beckett says smiling at Castle, as he sits down in his chair putting a coffee in front of her "I think I should put in my request now, 'keep -em comin', I have a feeling it's going to be one of those days."

After a while of doing paperwork on the case, Kate pushes back from her desk "I guess we should see if his client is ready to confess again and save us some time."

Opening the door Beckett looks at them and asks "Counselor, do we need to bring in cots or do you think we can get this over with today?"

"Detective, we're not going to fold for your convenience."

"So, what's your client have to say for himself?" asks Beckett putting her notebook down and sitting at the table.

"Detective this is an injunction preventing the testing of my client's blood."

Taking the paper, Beckett reads it and then addresses the lawyer "I'll notify our lab to hold on the testing. Meanwhile, what does your client have to say for himself?"

"My client was defending himself."

"By taking a gun to a fist-fight?" Beckett asks mockingly.

"It wasn't his gun." states the lawyer.

"Good thing I've never heard that one before." says Beckett.

"We have a statement from his landlord that when he left the residence he was empty handed." says Prentiss as he hands it to Beckett.

Prompting Castle to observe "That was quick."

"Mr Chilton here and the landlord, Mr Bailey, are family members, your deceased, Mr Vickers, is Mr Chilton's cousin."

While Beckett and the lawyer talk, there's a quiet knock on the door and Ryan opens it handing a piece of paper to Castle to hand to Beckett. The scribbled note from Ryan says "Lab: two sets prints on gun. Suspect's left on grip and slide - clip and shells have victims." He hands it to Beckett to read while he asks the lawyer "So if he left empty handed, where did the gun come from?"

"The final details are yet to be disclosed but we can tell you this," the lawyer explains "Mr Vickers brought the gun and was waving it around."

Castle nodded as he wrote a note on Beckett's note pad.

While Beckett read and Castle wrote, the lawyer announced "And with that, I need just a few more minutes to finish with my client please."

"Let's go Castle," Beckett says standing "I want to go see what our M.E. has found before we continue this." The two stand and exit the interrogation room to meet Ryan just walking by. "Beckett, CSU reports that they found the fifth bullet." Ryan tells them. Then ponders out loud "Maybe five bullets is a bad omen. Last time..."

"Ryan!" she snaps.

"Sorry, it was embedded in the wall behind the front door. No one noticed it because you could only find it when the door was closed. They said that judging by the angle the round went through the crack in the door-frame just below the hinge while the door was wide open."

"So now we have the five rounds that were fired, the new one behind the door, the one in the wall across the street and the three in our victim." Beckett recites the information as if she was reading it out-loud to the others for the first time.

"Did CSU give you any indication of the order of the rounds?" Castle asks.

"As a matter of fact they did." Ryan answers "They explained it in long terms, the abbreviated version has the shooter moving from the front door of the residence, down the steps, and then into contact with the other party in the matter. First shot came from the top of the stairs at the doorway. That one hit the wall across the street at a downward angle. The second shot came from what seems to be right in front of the second person during a struggle, that is the one that lodged behind the door. CSU said it was fired from about a foot above the ground. The third, fourth and fifth shot which killed your victim seem to have been fired during that struggle. The CSU tech said that the final three shell casings got stuck into the mud at their feet probably forced down by the force of the shell ejecting. He said that there was blood spatter on the casings. He has another set of pictures on the way up, he said he used infrared light to highlight the footprints and blood in the mud."

"Thanks Ryan." Beckett says. Looking past Castle now, she, almost as if talking to herself says "We'll need the ballistics report to tighten this up." Then more brightly "Why don't we go see Lanie and see what she's found in the mean time."

"Sounds like a plan Detective." Castle says with a smile as the two walk past her desk and she grabs her keys and phone.

* * *

They arrive at the morgue. Beckett, walks through the door first, seeing the M.E. standing near a body on a table, she dives right into business. "So, do you have any findings for us on this shooting case?"

"Well hello and a good day to you too De-_tec_-tive." Lanie says putting her hand on her hip in a defiant pose but with a friendly smile.

"Sorry. Wrapped up in thought. Ahem! Hello my dear Doctor Parish! How are you this fine and glorious day? I hope your day is going well!" Beckett says smiling and assuming a slightly more genteel façade than is needed.

"Thank you and to you and Mister Castle too."

"Pleasant enough for you?" Beckett asks pointedly.

"Yes it is." Lanie says with a smile and giggle as she turns back to her task.

"So Doctor Parish do you have any findings for us on this shooting case?"

"I'm still waiting for the blood tests to come back." Lanie says. "The _preliminary_ tests show high levels of what looks to be MDMA. It was probably street Ecstasy. There was also ingested alcohol but I don't have the levels yet. If you asked me for a characterization, I'd say he was drinking and had done the drugs not too long before being killed but again, the blood tests will be needed for concrete confirmation."

"Oh, about that, the blood drawn from the suspect, seal that up, they have an injunction against us testing it."

"Okay, we'll do that. Please send a copy of the paperwork to us. Your suspect's shirt was covered with the victims blood as you suspected. The blood at the site of the scuffle, where the victim was found is from two people, the victim and someone else but we don't know who."

"Does the body give you any indications of how the fight went?" Beckett asks looking at the body on the table.

"Other than the obvious 'badly', no, not yet or at least not fully. What turned out to be the fatal shot looks like it was the first of the three shots. It went in and deflected off of the top of the pubic bone at a shallow angle and then pierced his heart. He died pretty quickly at that point. The other two shots look to be in very rapid succession. All of the shots seem to have come from a very low angle and judging by the muscle damage, the victim was bent over or hunched down." the doctor explains.

"How do you arrive at that hypothesis?" Castle asks, obviously very curious about the technical details.

"If you look here," she says pointing to the body "The first shot went in from about this angle" she explains holding her pencil above the victim's knees and pointing up into the torso. "but for the damage in this area" pointing the stomach area "he had to have been slightly hunched over for the bullet to make the trip from the bone up to his heart in a straight line. The second and third shots, however, actually came from an angle like this." and she moves her pencil closer to the body and towards the right hip "These two rounds actually almost ended up in the same place. According to the people in ballistics, the gun, because of the design and age, could have fired twice quickly with only a minor bit of force on the trigger if the gun wasn't held tight. You'll have to discuss it with ballistics but it's possible that the gun was fired by the victim as he died."

"Very interesting Doctor Parish, thanks for the explanation." Castle says.

"I expect all the results shortly. I'll give you a call when they're in." Lanie says looking at Beckett.

"Okay, thanks Lanie. Come on Castle, we've got a suspect to question." she turns and heads for the door.

* * *

During the ride back to the precinct, Castle was unusually quiet. Beckett kept glancing over. He was looking out the window at the world going by without really focusing on anything.

"You okay there Castle?" she asks.

"Hummm" was all he said.

"Did you see the alligator back there driving the truck?" she says knowing he's zoned out.

"No, I missed it, must have been distracted." he mumbles.

Beckett smiles and leaves him alone to ponder whatever has him that distracted.

As they park the car and get out, Castle suddenly looks at Kate, "Did you say something about a truck?"

"No. Sorry. You must have imagined it." she smirks. "You okay Rick?" she says quietly as they walk side-by-side to the main door of the precinct.

"Yeah, I am. Sorry if I'm distracted. I'm intrigued by the quirks in this case but also by the seemingly bizarre turn of events that has one friend killing another."

"I know Castle, it is sad. An accident is the one exception to the three rules about why people kill." she says "We'll see what the suspect has to say for himself now."

As the two stand in the elevator on the way up, Beckett's phone rings. "Hi dad!" she says cheerily before suddenly looking concerned "Are you okay?" she asks not even aware that she's got an iron-death-grip on Castle's forearm making him wince. "Um.. Tonight? Sure, yeah, that sounds good. I'd like that." she responds and eases the grip on his arm "Yeah, I'll probably bring him. He's getting harder and harder to shake so it's just gotten easier to just drag him along." she says with a wink at Castle. "You _sure_ you're okay?" the concern obvious in her voice. "Okay, we'll see you then." she says finally hanging up the phone as they exit the elevator.

"What gives? Is he okay?" Rick asks, worried for her father.

"He says he's fine, he wants to meet for dinner, he said he's in our end of town and thought it might be nice." she explains on the way to her desk.

"You don't believe him?"

"I don't know, he sounded like he was down. Like he has been having a bad day."

"Like he might..." Castle asks without completing the sentence.

"Yeah, a little like that. His sponsor is good and he's been strong for a while but everyone has days that they get down, he, like anyone with that disease is only one drink away from free-fall. He doesn't usually call like this so it just worried me."

"Okay then, let's clean this case up and get out of here on time." Castle says cheerily as if to try and lift her spirits by himself.

"Right you are Mister Castle." Beckett says with a smile acknowledging his efforts. "Hey guys" she says turning to her partners as they approach their desks "Anything new from the canvas?"

"Nothing out of the ordinary. A couple of neighbors in the building say his grandfather left him the place after he died. Seems the kid was his only living relative. Most reports are that he was an average kid with just a little too much time on his hands. No steady jobs, just sort of kicked around." Ryan says.

"I just got told that the ballistics report is on the way up." Esposito informs them.

"Okay, we're going to talk to him again, and see what we can find out." Beckett says turning on her heel with a renewed purpose.

Entering the interrogation room Beckett drops her notebook onto the table noisily. "So, where do we stand counselor?"

"We're ready to make a statement Detective." The lawyer states.

"Great, so why'd you kill the guy you said is your friend?" Beckett spits at the suspect trying to shake things up.

"I... I didn't... I mean... He..." the suspect stammers before breaking down again.

"Detective, they were together at Mister Vickers' house, engaging in some less than legal experiments in advanced chemistry when Mister Vickers got out of control and began to accuse my client of all sorts of irrational things including working for the CIA and spying on him."

Castle coughed and raised his eyebrows at Beckett who gently but firmly kicked the side of his foot under the table.

"So that's when your client decided to kill Vickers and end the fight with the gun?" she snaps.

"My client was leaving Detective. The two were arguing and my client was fed up with the argument and he decided to leave. That's when it spilled out into the hallway. Vickers was yelling at him as he left the apartment. He was the first one out the door when Mister Vickers came after him with the gun."

_"He was crazy!"_ the suspect yells "I was trying to get away and he took a shot at me as soon as I got to the street."

"He obviously didn't hit you, where did the shot go?" Beckett calmly asks him.

"I heard the shot and saw it hit the building across the street in front of me. I turned around and he was waving the gun and screaming. I ran over to him and tried to get the gun away from him. We were fighting over it. I had it by the barrel and he was screaming at me and wouldn't let it go. I tried to pull it away and it went off, I started screaming at him when it went off again he stopped fighting and I let go. Suddenly it went off two more times and he stumbled backwards and fell." he said panting and sobbing.

"So Detective, as you can see, it was my client trying to defend himself. That's how he got the injury on his hand there." the lawyer says pointing to the loosely wrapped bloody bandage around his client's hand.

"I have an important question for you." Castle said "When you were struggling with your friend, how were you holding the gun when it went off?"

"I... We... I..." he glances at his lawyer who nods at him. "He was holding it like normal in his left hand and I was leaning on it, holding it by the barrel, I was trying to put my weight on it so he'd let it go. Why?"

"Is that when the gun went off?" Beckett asks.

"Yeah, I thought it might have hit him in the leg but it didn't seem to. We kept fighting over it and that's when it went off again. I decided to get away from him so I let go and backed up to run, that's when I heard it go off again two more times quickly and he fell. I tried to help him up that's when I saw he was bleeding."

"Detective, will you still be trying to charge my client?"

"Please wait here a little while longer." Beckett said standing up and exiting the room with Castle in tow.

"Well Detective, where do we stand?" came an authoritative voice as soon as she opened the door.

"Captain Gates! I didn't see you there, sorry. I'm inclined to believe the suspect and that it was a form of self defense that occurred while they fought for control of the weapon."

"Do I hear a 'but' in there?" the captain asks.

"I don't want to be premature, we still haven't gotten all the reports in yet. I'm still waiting for the toxicology and I haven't looked at the ballistics report yet."

"Okay, wrap it up with a bow on it for our favorite D.A. before the end of business." she snaps as she turns and heads to her office.

Castle and Beckett watch her as she strides to her office, turn to each other and then in unison, shrug their shoulders.

"Well, you have your orders. Lucky for us we'll be out on time for dinner." Castle says dropping into his chair.

"Hey Espo, anything in that ballistics report that we should know about?" Beckett asks as she puts her notebook down on her desk.

"Nada. The only thing CSU thought was strange was that the round they found in the wall of the building across the street had loads of dirt and crap on it, they reported that one of the things they found was something called 'Cosmoline' but they don't say what that is. They also found residue of it on the door frame and outside of the front door of the victim's residence, the victim's shirt and pants and even his shoes and only a little on your suspect's hands." Esposito says.

"That's because none of them are old enough to know what it is." Castle says with a smile. "Did they say where the gun came from? I'll bet it is world war two vintage but in like-new condition?"

"Uhh.. Yeah." Esposito mystified asks "How'd you guess? The report says that it's a Colt 1911 pistol."

"Yeah, Forty-Five caliber right?" Castle adds.

"Dead-on there Mister Writer-Man." Esposito says with a smile.

"Castle? Do you have some insight you'd like to share with the rest of the class?" Ryan says with a snarky edge.

"If you want my guess, the gun was his grandfathers or something like that. The Colt 1911, forty-five caliber side-arm was the standard military issue in the war. Cosmoline was a preservative that the military used during the war. It was _everywhere_. My guess is that the gun was a souvenir he got overseas that was brought home and never used. To preserve it when he got it, he probably covered it with the Cosmoline. The first round that went through the barrel pulled all the crap that had collected in it out and deposited it on the bullet which hit the wall." Castle explains. "If he truly did fire from the doorway at his friend, then the Cosmoline, which is a waxy substance would be all over the door and area around where the shot was taken."

"So it wasn't something he used regularly." Esposito adds.

"Right." Castle says pointing at Esposito "As a matter of fact, this was probably the first time it was fired since the war. It has likely been sitting in a closet with the rounds already in it waiting for the first use. He might have handled the rounds once or twice by taking them out of the clip and then putting them back in."

"Let's wait for the tox report before we make a decision on this guy." Beckett says sitting down at her desk. "Ryan, you talking to the D.A. for the other case you're handing over?" She asks without turning around.

"Yeah I am, do you want me to update her on this one too?" Ryan says but he already knows the answer.

"Please do. She's still giving me the stink-eye when we talk. I want to irritate her as little as possible."

"She's still being nasty to you?" Castle asks surprised.

"Oh yeah. She's still double checking the double checks on my cases. She's convinced you should have been handled differently and charged for that escape but got special treatment."

"Well, let's not give her a reason to hate you anymore than she does now. If you don't mind, while you folks finish the details on this case, I'm going to sneak into the other room and write some notes of my own." he says as he grabs a note pad from her desk and scoots off to the break room.

* * *

By the time Castle returns to the bullpen, they've accepted the suspect's story and written it up appropriately. Ryan and Esposito have signed off on their reports and added them to the stack. Beckett has taken the entire stack to the Captain's office for transfer to the D.A.'s office for prosecution.

"Sorry I missed it, I'm curious, what did the tox report show for this guy?" Castle asks.

Ryan is the first one to answer this one. "It seems that his chemistry experiments didn't account for a couple of little mistakes. He decided he wasn't bulky enough so he's been taking steroids _and_ he's been using one of those testosterone medications. Those two oversights were exacerbated by his allergy to tubers. We assume he never knew that vodka came from potatoes. So, those things and the Ecstasy marinated in cheap vodka was a potent mixture. The lab said his testosterone level was almost off the charts and he was having a histamine reaction which elevated his adrenaline, also measuring off the charts, which seems to have been a poor combination with the steroids. Basically, he was high, wired and raging."

"Wow. It sounds like a chemical perfect storm. Thanks for the recap." Castle answers.

"Yeah. I'll stick to coffee and chocolate." Ryan answers as he puts a folder away.

"Did you figure out why he got shot three times?" Castle asks.

"I got that one bro'." Esposito answers "I talked to Lanie and the guy from ballistics, the opinion is that the first shot that hit the vic was the third shot fired, that's when your suspect let go. The body's reflexes, probably combined with the adrenalin, caused the vic to twitch causing the last two shots and since the gun had been twisted around in his hands, both shots went into him too."

"Thanks bro'" Castle says to the detective as they both shake their heads at the irony of the situation.

"So Detective, you free for dinner?" Castle asks trying to be cute as he sits down in his chair and Beckett returns to her desk.

"Nope, sorry, busy. I got a date with my two favorite guys." she says followed by a loud _"Not you two!"_ to her team without even turning around.

"Damn! I thought I was going to get a free meal out of the deal." Esposito says.

"Not me bro' I have my date waiting for me at home." Ryan says glowing like he always does when he talks about his wife.

While Esposito looks at him and shakes his head Beckett announces "Listen you two, _go home_. We got a reasonably easy one and we finished it quickly. Let's take the opportunity to live normal lives and get out of here at respectable hours."

"Don't need to tell me twice!" Espo crows as he closes up his work.

Ryan already has his phone out and is calling Jenny to tell her he's coming home at a normal hour.

"Well Detective, time for you to practice what you preach." Castle says to Beckett as he stands.

"Just logging out here and closing up to finish." She says as she grabs her phone and keys while staring at her screen waiting for it to be done. "Okay, that's it. Let's hit the road." she announces not noticing that Castle has already gone around behind her and is holding her coat open for her. "Not wasting any time eh Mister Castle?"

"None at all Detective Beckett, we have important places to go." he says as he gently helps her on with her coat.

"She grabs her bag, keys, and phone off the desk and the two walk to the elevator to leave only to hear a "Goodnight Detective!" from Gates' office.

"G'Night sir!" she calls back as she stares at Castle with a bit of the deer-in-headlights look and then they hurry to the elevator.


	5. Meet the real Nikki Heat

"I don't think I'd ever seen this place before." He said looking out the window as she parked the car.

"Not surprising, my dad has a hound-dog's nose for finding out-of-the-way places that serve good coffee and are quiet."

"Well, this sure seems out-of-the-way. I think I've been past here a hundred times and never noticed it."

"Well, let's see if they have a fresh pot of coffee for us." Kate says smiling at him as she turns off the car and opens the door.

"Right behind you Detective."

As they step inside and as their eyes adjust to the lower light, they see Jim sitting in a booth over on the side.

"Hi Dad!" she calls out as they approach.

"Katie!" he calls out wrapping her in a big hug. "I needed this. Thanks for coming. Hi Rick." Jim says with a grin but not letting his daughter go.

"Nice to see you again Jim." Castle says. Then he waves three fingers at a waitress and points to Jim's coffee cup.

"Dad you had me worried for a bit there." she says as she slides into the booth across from her father and Castle slides in next to her.

"I'm really sorry Katie bug. It's been a very long day and the file I was reading got me down. That's why I called."

"You're okay though?" she asks still worried.

"Yeah, I am. The people in this class-action suit I'm working on reminded me a little of us, a little boy and little girl lost their mother and the father lost his wife and it just hit me." he explains looking at the coffee in his cup "Normally I'm able to handle it but this time it got to me so I left the office, turned off my phone and went for a walk in the sunshine and through the park and that's when I called, I just felt like saying hello."

"I'm glad you did. I, we, needed a break." she says correcting herself, "We just finished a case."

"Was it a hard one?" Jim asks.

"It was a relatively easy case but it _reeks_ of the human tragedy and it's nice to get out and away from it." she explains.

"Well, I'm glad I could oblige. How are you doing Rick?" Jim asks, now wearing a cheery smile thanks to his daughter. She can see the cloud lifting from him.

"I'm doing fine Jim, thanks for asking."

"And Martha and Alexis?" the senior Beckett adds in quickly.

"Oh they're both doing fine. Alexis is still having her moments but she's rebounding spectacularly. I think I am having more trouble coping with what went on than she is. Martha's school is going gang-busters and she's as busy as can be. I don't think I've seen her this happy doing work in a long time."

"That's great Rick, I'm glad to hear it." Jim says with a genuine smile.

"Jim, I don't know if Kate told you, my mother went out and purchased a book. Normally, the only time she'd be caught _dead_ in a bookstore is when one of mine is released but she ventured in to one of her own volition. She got 'The Dummies Guide to Baseball', she said she needs to learn more so she can make amends to you."

"Oh that's too funny! She doesn't have to make amends but maybe she can come to a ballgame with all of us and enjoy it a little."

"I'm sure she would love to. I'd enjoy just watching her so far out of her element." Rick snickers.

_"__**IT IS!**__"_ an enthusiastic voice comes from next to them. _"You're Richard Castle!"_ a young woman says pointing at him.

"Yes I am." he replies with his best smile for the girl.

"I'm Cindy and this is my cousin Sarah from Omaha and she's out here on vacation with us. We love your books! Her mother and my mother are always getting them the day they come out! Could we please get your autograph?" she says holding out one of his Nikki Heat books.

"Sure! Let's move over there." he says pointing to a vacant table to allow Kate and her father some privacy.

"_**Omigod!**__ You're Detective Beckett too!_ I recognize you from the Cosmo article! My sister will **not** believe this _I got to meet Nikki Heat!_ Can we have your autograph too?" Sarah says as she recognizes Kate.

Kate turns a brilliant crimson at the attention in front of her father and he's grinning ear to ear. "Uh... well." she starts and Castle cuts in "Sure you can _but_" he says holding his hand up in front of the girl's camera phone, "you can't take her picture, NYPD rules. We don't want to endanger her or anyone else she works with. You can take all you want of me. As a matter of fact," he gently pulls the phone from the girl's grip and hands it to Kate "Detective Beckett, would you do the honors for us?" he asks Kate as he puts an arm around each of the girls and has them hold the book in front of the three of them.

"Recording!" Kate says as she starts the video recorder.

"Hi, I'm Richard Castle, and these are two of my new friends, Cindy and Sarah, say 'Hi to mom!' ladies." and the two in unison give a fangirl squeal and say "Hi mom!" and wave furiously to the camera. "They met me and Detective Beckett here in New York. Wave hello Detective." and she sticks her hand into the video and waves at the girls who squeal in delight again.

"Now for a couple of stills. Ready?" he asks Kate. "Ready." She responds and he puts his arm around one girl and holds the book up for a photo and then the girls swap positions and he does it again. "So, who do I make this out to? Sarah and Cindy?" He asks as he pulls out his pen and signs their book and then hands the book and pen to Kate to do the same. The bright red blush not diminishing as she autographs the book under her father's amused and proud gaze.

"Here you go ladies." Kate says handing the book and phone back to them.

"Oh thank you _so very much_ Detective!" Sarah gushes "My sister has decided she wants to become a cop because of Nikki Heat, she thinks it'd be cool to be able to help people like that."

"I'm glad to hear it. Please tell her that I said thank you. It's a hard but rewarding career." Kate graciously says.

"Thank you I will! _I can't wait to call her!_" Sarah says with another fangirl squeal and they rush off giggling and chattering with excitement as Castle sits back down.

"Soooooo... Katie... " Jim says drawing it out with a bright sparkle in his eyes. "Tell me, does this..." motioning his finger at where the two girls stood moments before "sort of thing happen often?" he teases, grinning wide and fixing a hard gaze at her.

_"Daaaad!"_ she groans burying her face in her hands "Of _all_ times! No, not often _thankfully_. It happens to him" she jerks her thumb at Rick "but not to me. Only once in a great while." The blush still obvious but subsiding.

"Sorry about that Jim, to me and my family it's second nature, I try to keep it away from Kate but she's as much a part of the success of Nikki Heat as I am so I'm not sure it will be going away soon. I fib with the NYPD rules thing because it helps keep Kate and everyone else out of the limelight."

"Oh Katie, if you could have seen your face when that happened!" Her father chuckles, the light in his eyes bright, the darkness lifted.

"_Cut it out!_" she says to her father but she whacks Rick on the arm.

"_Ow!_ Why'd you hit me?" he complains with a smile.

"I can't hit _him_ and it's _your_ fault." she says grinning.

"Win or lose, I lose." Castle says with a smile at Jim.

"Katie, your mother would be worse than I am, so don't complain. I'm sure she's looking down and telling everyone who you are." Jim says with a wry smile as he takes a sip of his coffee.

"Yeah, like that time when I..." she stops abruptly and soberly looks at Castle "Never mind, that story will keep."

"You're right Kate, this is great coffee. Jim, how'd you find this place?" Castle says allowing Beckett off the hook.

"Rick, if you ever want to find the best places for a quiet coffee that are off-the-beaten-path. Ask someone at an A.A. meeting." he says smiling.

"I never thought of that! How true!" he says making a mental note about it.

"One of the things that makes the coffee better is these ceramic mugs, they hold the heat better than the paper or plastic ones."

"Hmm.. I've heard that." Castle says quietly.

"You two hungry?" Jim asks. "The pot pie here is world class. I don't think I've ever had a better one."

"I'm in." Rick chimes. "How about you Kate? Think your embarrassment can subside long enough for a meal?"

"Do you see what I have to put up with dad?" she says giving Castle a shoulder bump in the booth. "I'll have their Mac & Cheese, it looked delicious."

"You've been here before?" Castle asks surprised.

"No, I saw it on the walk over here." she smirks in his face "How many times do I have to tell you, _trained detective_?"

"Has she always been this feisty?" Rick asks Jim.

"Oh goodness no Rick." he says with a wave.

"_Ha!_" she says childishly to Castle's face.

"She used to be _much_ worse!" Jim says prompting Castle to look back at Kate and say "_Ha!_" in her face too.

As the other two play a short childish game of _"Oh Yeah?"_ Jim sits there smiling wide enjoying the sight of his daughter, finally out of the darkness that had engulfed her, smiling and bantering with someone she cares about and who cares as much for her.

"I'm glad to see that you're handling this like an adult Katie." Jim says mocking her as he waves for the waitress.

"You think this is bad Jim, wait until I tell her friend Lanie about" is all he gets out before she sticks a finger into his ribcage tickling him and causing him to yelp and jump.

"Don't you dare!" She says in her best "Or else." voice but he smiles anyway knowing she can't stop him.

While Jim places orders for the whole table, Rick and Kate, almost nose-to-nose argue about who's not going to hear this story.

As the good-natured bantering ends, they turn to see Jim smiling at them. "Don't let me stop you two, this is obviously something of monumental importance you two need to work out."

The two stop fooling around and return to acting like adults at the table.

Jim, smiling, looks at Rick and says "Her problem isn't her friends. Her problem is going to be her cousins."

"Daaaaad! _Nooooo!_ Don't you dare!" she yells, almost too loud and attracting attention. Bright red again, she slouches down in the booth and pleads with him "_Please_ don't! I'll never live this down."

"You _know_ I have to tell your Nana. She'd never forgive me if I didn't tell her all about this. I'll suggest she not spread it around but you know her..."

She buries her face in her hands again quietly saying "I am _SOOO_ doomed."

The two enjoy her discomfort but Jim winks at Rick letting him know he's teasing her and he won't make a point of telling the whole story.

Rick, plays along "Geeze Jim, next Beckett family gathering they'll all be lining up for her autograph. That'll be a treat. They may have to rent a larger hall."

"Argh!" she spouts sitting up straight and turning to Rick she gets right in his face and sternly tells him "_Zip it! Kit-ten!"_ just as their meals arrive.

"I think I understand now Katie." her father says as he starts his meal.

"What's that dad?"

"What you meant when you said that Alexis was the only adult in the family."

_"You told him that?"_ Castle asks disbelievingly.

"Yeah I did. It's easy to see that out of the three of you she's more the adult most of the time." she says diving into her meal.

With half a mouthful, Jim hides his mouth behind his hand and mumbles "Four" with a wink and a twinkle in his eye.

The remainder of the mealtime was cheery and humorous. The three sharing easy banter and telling stories.

"Katie, I'm so glad you came." Jim says as the three stand up to leave. "Rick, thank you too. It's nice to see my Katie laughing and joking and occasionally being gotten the better of." he says hugging his daughter.

"You're welcome Jim. Anytime at all. I'll love to hear more stories about little Katie."

"Sure, and next time we can bring Martha to tell us more stories about little Ricky." Kate chimes in looking at Castle smugly.

"Okay you two. I have to get home and get some sleep for tomorrow, I have another busy day."

"Thanks again Jim, and thanks for the dinner, I'd never have found this place." Rick says shaking his hand.

The two Becketts turn to leave as Kate takes her father's arm and Rick follows behind.

"Now dad, you call if you want, _anytime_, you already know that. You don't need to have a reason."

"I know Katie bug but you have your own life. I don't need to clutter up your's with my problems."

"Dad! Your problems are my problems too. You have to share, remember? Don't make me call for reinforcements."

"Okay okay dear. I'll work on it. I'm sorry. I promise I'll call if I need to talk but after this adventure, I'm all right, I feel much better now. I haven't felt this good in a long time."

"Good." Kate says hugging her father's arm again. "Now can we give you a ride?"

"Thanks Katie but I'm going to walk for a few blocks and enjoy the early evening air before I catch a quiet cab ride back home."

"Okay then. I love you dad." she says giving him a big hug and a kiss. "We'll talk again soon. Rick and I have some business to take care of tonight."

"Going to practice your autographing books?" he smirks only to be met with one of her eye-rolls.

"See you again Jim." Castle says reaching out to shake his hand.

"Thanks again Rick." then with a glance at his daughter he quietly adds "For giving her back. I missed her all these past years."

"My pleasure." Castle says as he puts his arm around Kate's shoulder and they turn to walk to her car.

* * *

_**Author's Note:**_  
I stole... er... borrowed the idea of Kate's Nana (Beckett) and the family gatherings from "Precious Things" by The Little Monster 1024


	6. A sad walk down memory lane

"At least I can thank you for not letting them take my picture." she says sullenly as she pulls the car into a parking space.

"I don't mind your being pestered _a little_ but I do want to protect you from the crazies." he explains.

"My heeerooo!" Kate sings tilting her head to the side and batting her eye-lashes.

"Of course _I_ prefer to pester you myself." he says with a smirk and an eyebrow waggle.

"Thanks... I think." she says under her breath as they get out of the car at the loft.

"I still wish I had your dad's reaction on video. You _should_ have seen his face!" Castle bubbles excitedly.

"I did! In case you forgot, I was there." Kate reminds him.

"No you weren't. The moment she recognized who you were, you were in free-fall and I'll bet a buck you didn't see a damn thing after that." he says putting his arm around her as they walk into the building. "Your dad was grinning like a fool at you. He loved seeing you like that!"

"I am _soooo_ screwed. When he tells my cousins about this... I'm _never_ going to hear the end of it."

"Oh come on Debbie Downer. I'm sure you'll hear the end of it... some time in the next decade... or two."

"Argh!" she groans in frustration.

He lets Kate exit the elevator first and he secretly revels in watching her use her key to open the door to his loft. It is still a thrill to think that this has become reality.

"Let me have your coat." he offers closing the door behind them.

"I'll trade you, my coat for a glass of that white wine we had the other day." she says handing it to him.

"You're on. Do you want to relax or dive into the briefcase?" he asks closing the closet and heading for the kitchen while she gets her boots off.

"What makes you think I even want to open it? Maybe I just want to ignore it for a while?" she answers with a touch of confrontation in her voice.

"Gee, I dunno, could it be that I _know_ you better than that?" He snarks back at her.

"Put a sock in it writer-man!" She says grinning.

"Oh? So I'm _not_ right?" He asks from the kitchen.

"No! Of course you're not right!" then after a pause she quietly confesses "Okay, so maybe a little."

"A little?" he asks picking up the glasses of wine and coming around to where she's standing

"_Fine!_ You're right... _This_ time. Just don't get used to it." she says pointing her finger in his face with a little smile.

He smiles back as he hands her the glass of wine as they head for his office.

"Shuddup!" she snaps with a smile at his smug look.

"Anything you say Detective. Here, sit on this end of the couch and I'll get you the case and a table." he says handing her his glass as she sits down.

"This couch feels soooo good." she sighs sinking down and leaning her head back over the back of the couch.

"I'm glad you enjoy it. It's been a haven for me for a long time. I'm glad to share it with you. Here's the case." He says putting the case next to her on the couch "Let me get you a T.V. table to work on."

"Thanks." now putting the case on her lap, she reverently runs her hands over it again "So Mike, what did you leave us?" then after a short pause, quietly "I still wish you'd talked to me!"

"He seemed like a pretty cool guy and awfully wise." Rick said grabbing a fold-up table from across the room.

"Oh he was. He was larger than life in a lot of ways." She says as he sets up the little table in front of her.

"I think it speaks to the feelings and opinions he had for you that he was, for lack of a better word, ashamed to talk to you about what was going on his life. I could see it in his face, although I had no idea why at the time. He had a very high opinion of you and he didn't think he was worthy of your respect. I wouldn't hold what happened against him. He was in a tough spot and knew he had to pull himself out of it."

"You see Castle, this is what really ticks me off about you." She says fixing him with one of her penetrating gazes.

Taken aback, he looks at her wide-eyed "Why? What? What'd I do?"

"There are times that the nine-year-old channels a wise and intelligent man and there's _no warning_ when the switch is getting thrown. It just comes out of left field." she finishes smiling at him lovingly.

"I'll try to give you a warning next time."

"Please do. It's only fair. Now, have you got your lock-picks handy? I left mine in my bag."

"Right here." he says pulling them out of his pocket and handing the little kit to her.

Pulling out a thin tool, she fixes her gaze on the briefcase lock and starts to work on it.

"Just stick it... put it in... twist... over there." Castle offers, crowding her work.

"Castle. I know what I'm doing."

"I know but if you..."

"_Castle!_" she says looking at him sternly.

"What?"

Quietly she tells him "You're in my light."

"Oh. Sorry." he says sheepishly sitting back into the couch.

**_*CLICK*_**

The lock pops open. She hands him back his pick and kit "Thanks." She holds the briefcase in her lap and runs her hands over the top again. "Well Mike. Here we go." she says as she opens the briefcase.

Looking over her shoulder Castle starts right in "I would have thought of him as having a little bottle of booze hidden in here."

Without even looking, she pulls a small silver flask from a pocket inside the top part of the case and hands it to him. "He was, if nothing else, reliable."

"Wow. Look at this. Did you ever read it?" Castle asks suddenly.

"No, what's it say?" she asks leaning over as he twists it in the light for a better view.

"It's engraved to Major General Ralph Royce, in commemoration of his service at Brooks Field, San Antonio, Texas by his loyal staff."

Surprised, Kate tells him. "I had _no_ idea. He never mentioned it. That's probably a grandfather or something. Pretty cool." she smiles.

"Let's see what other things he had." she says as she takes a heavily used legal pad out and gives it to Castle. "This notepad looks to be full of notes and will need to be gone through later on."

"His ubiquitous date book." Beckett says with a sigh, taking it out of the briefcase. "He _always_ had one of these with him. I'd bet if they looked, his family would find one of these for each year he was on the force. He always had little notes in it about things, nothing ever monumental but he had little things in there for reminders." She says as she fans the well-worn book.

"Here's his last entry. '2NY', that was when he flew out here on his last trip." She almost whispers the last part as the memories of seeing her friend shot to death in an alley swell and almost overwhelm her. She closes the book smartly and flexes her shoulders to try and get herself back into her task. "Castle, please put this with the flask." as she hands it to him. "I'll look at that another time."

"As you wish."

The cute remark, used by Esposito to Beckett catches her attention and she smiles at him, she reaches out and squeezes his hand.

As she turns back to the case, Castle does another flick of the pages of the book almost unconsciously. "Oh my." he suddenly exclaims as he notices something go by.

"What?" she asks, leaning over his shoulder to see what he's looking at.

"Sorry. Nothing. We'll look later." he tries to downplay and avoid it his mistake.

"Come on Rick. What is it?" she asks, the concern palpable.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to poke this wound." He holds open the book to the week of November 17 and shows her the notation, written in pen:

"KB Bday/JB 1/9/99"

"It looks like he never forgot you either." he says quietly as he gently closes the book and feels Kate lean her head onto his shoulder. He sits quietly with the closed book on his thigh and he lets her rest and reflect on him silently for a bit.

She sniffles and sits upright again but doesn't say anything. He feels the coolness of the moisture on his shoulder having seeped through his shirt. Still without a word, he puts the datebook down with the flask and returns his attention to the contents of the case.

She shuffles little things around, receipts, odd business cards, a silver-tone business card holder engraved with his name on it "Well this is nice." she says as she flips open the card holder only to be met with a furious "Phhhtttt!" from Castle.

"Castle!" she snaps unamused.

"Who would have thought of carrying condoms in a business card case!" he laughs. Now assuming a proper posh English voice "The name's Condom, Randy Condom. Here's my card. Please call me my dear."

"_Castle!_" she says more emphatically.

"I'm sorry," he says wiping his eyes "that's just _too_ brilliant."

"**Stop it.**" she chides again.

Almost apologetically he explains "No, really, it _is_ a smart move. The case will fit two or three, it's hard so they won't get crushed and damaged and they stay protected in the case and no one will know what it really contains."

"Are you _quite_ finished now?" she asks giving him a harsh stare.

"Ahem... Yes Ms Beckett... I'll be good." as he folds his hands in his lap and looks straight ahead unable to get the grin off of his face.

"I doubt it." bubbles out as she turns back to the task, she pulls the condoms out of the little case and throws them onto a spot near-by on the floor and hands him the case with a cool look "Keep this too."

She tosses the receipts and other flotsam onto the same spot as the condoms. She pulls out a small cigar box, opens it and then snaps it shut right away. "Please..." is all she can get out before the words catch in her throat. "Would you..." is all she can huskily manage as he reaches over and gently takes the small box from her hands.

"I saw the photo when you opened it. Don't worry, I'm here." he quietly offers as he puts his hand on her shoulder. He knows that the photo of her and Mike, the two in uniform, is an emotional atom-bomb and will need to be looked at another time when she's ready for it.

She croaks out an almost imperceptible "Thank you." and returns to the contents of the case to try and hide her rampaging emotions.

Castle reaches over, pulls a tissue out of the dispenser next to the couch and hands it to her.

She takes the tissue but doesn't say anything. She wipes her eyes and concentrates on the things in the case. More odd papers, a page from an L.A. newspaper, a book of "Find-A-Word" puzzles, she tosses them onto the trash pile. A small ring of keys which she hands to Castle to add to the "keep" pile. A roll of breath mints.

"You can toss those with the condoms, I think they were a set." he says nonchalantly.

"You're a jerk." she says smiling and giving him a shoulder bump for lightening the mood.

"Here, you can toss this with them too." he says as he reaches over her arm and pulls out a small bottle of hand sanitizer.

She stares at him with her narrow-eyed "Go ahead, say it." look as she snaps it out of his hand and tosses it onto the growing pile only to be met by his best "I'm innocent" look and charming smile.

"Let's see what we have up here." she says as she starts to dig into the top part of the case and pulls out a large unsealed well-used manilla envelope with scribbles and doodles on it. Opening it she finds some sealed letters from Mike tied with an elastic band and a post-it note saying "To Mail".

"Hmmm... What should we do with these?" she wonders out loud.

"I know what I think but it's more important to hear what you think." Castle says looking at the envelopes in her hands.

"I suppose we should stamp them and mail them." she muses.

"My thought was for you to write a letter to go with them explaining where they came from then put them in a larger envelope and mail them to their intended recipient. It might be too spooky to find a letter in your mailbox from a friend who's been gone for almost a year."

"There you go again, making sense. Maybe it's the wine affecting my judgement." she says winking. "Here, please put these on that pile and we'll do that later."

Taking the letters from her hand he says "Your wish is my command your highness."

"Knock it off... Wesley." she says with a wide smile.

"As you wish."

She rolls her eyes in humorous frustration as she goes back to the contents of the case.

"Hey! Here's his notes about Ganz from that case." he says picking up the notepad again. "He really had it all figured out before he even came here." he says reviewing the notes. "Girl duped, just acting. Ganz has one partner and sells to highest bidder. Girl in danger she can I.D. him. He even has 'Watch out for Seeger, plays by the rules. Is obnoxious and useless.' how about that, he got it right."

"Mike was a good judge of people."

"I'll second that motion." Castle says giving her an elbow bump and a grin.

"What's this?" Castle asks as he reaches into the case and pulls a small piece of paper off of a paperclip. "Looks like he found a fortune in the paper and cut it out."

"What's it say?" she asks continuing to poke around in the case.

"It says 'There are things that we don't want to happen but have to accept; things we don't want to know but have to learn; and people we can't live without but have to let go.' It sounds like he knew the depth of what he'd done to his relationship with you and probably other people."

Kate is stilled as Rick reads the clipping out loud. "Yeah." is all she can choke out.

Castle quietly sits next to her, just watching her rummage around through the stuff in the case. "Hey Rick. This is for you. I think it's appropriate." she says as she hands him a pen without looking at him. He can hear the unsteadiness in her voice.

"A Mont-Blanc. Thank you. You sure you don't want it?"

"I'm sure. I'd just lose it or get blood on it." she says, her voice betraying her emotions.

"Well then I'll just hold it for you. How's that?" he says cheerfully. "Now that I don't sign women's... y'know... I can use your pen to do the autographs."

"Sounds like a plan there partner." she says with a much lighter sound to her voice and a return elbow bump. After a while she stops and he sees her staring into the contents of the case without doing anything "Rick?"

"Right here." He answers quickly.

"Thanks for... well, for everything... Thanks for having my back in this too." she whispers.

"No need to thank me. I'm glad to help you." he says earnestly.

"Yes but _I_ need to thank you. One of these days I'm going to be able to do something for you to make up for all these things you've done for me."

"I can think of a few things if you need some help." he says wiggling his eyebrows with his Master of the Macabre charm turned on.

"Maybe I'll just keep you from getting injured in the field." her voice sounding sincere.

With confusion written all over his face he asks, "How would you do that?"

Grinning back at him now that he took the bait, "By _not_ injuring you in the field."

Closing his eyes in defeat "_Nice one!_" he moans. Then after a short pause "You're going to tell Alexis this one aren't you?"

"Maybe, or I might just save it for when I need it." she coos smugly.

Returning his attention to the case he asks "Anything else in there?"

"You don't handle losing very well there Mister Writer." she smirks. "There's something else in here" she says as she pulls a file folder from the same place the envelope came from. She opens it and right away says "Hmm... I don't understand this. It's all neat and organized. He used to... Oh _DAMN!_" she slumps a little in her seat.

"What? What's wrong?" Castle asks, the panic rising in his voice.

"That sonofa..." she quietly curses.

"What's that? What's wrong?" he presses, the panic still rising.

"I just realized something. That **_jerk!_**" she says smiling, then after a moment, she explains "When I started with Mike, his handwriting and reports were so freakin' messy and hard to read, that very early on I always did the paperwork for him, at times I'd pull the stuff out of his hands so he couldn't do it even when he offered." she explains staring into the folder with a sardonic grimace.

"And?" Castle asks like he's waiting for the punch line.

She turns to him and smiles a little and says "He got me."

"Huh?" he asks looking into the folder.

"This is his real handwriting, neat, clean and organized. That clever weasel _faked_ it so I'd always do the paperwork!" she says laughing now. "The bastard _got me_!"

"I think I'd have really liked this guy. It takes a great deal of skill to be able to put one over on Kate Beckett much less to be able to do it from the grave." Castle says. His admiration of her friend obvious.

"That was Mike. He was something." sitting back into the couch she picks up her wine glass and turns a bit wistful. "One time we pulled over this woman who was weaving all over the road..." she starts to explain, leaning back into the couch and stretching out her legs.

"While you talk, I'll clean up a bit." Castle says getting up but keeping his eye on her. He can feel that she doesn't want to be talking to an audience, just talking out loud without being watched.

"It was past midnight and we pulled over behind her with the lights on, reported our position and got out of the car. As we approached, we switched sides so I was approaching the driver's window first. She rolled down the window and I got her license and registration and was backing away when Mike unsnapped his holster and said to me _'Something doesn't feel right. We should get her out.'_ So I go back to the car and ask her to turn it off and get out. Everything by the book.

I was still trying to impress my T.O. so I was careful and meticulous. When I asked _Any weapons?_ She says _Yeah, I got a gun._ So I snapped into action, pushed her against the car and told her that I needed to frisk her. I nodded to Mike who nodded back, I holstered my weapon and I went about frisking her." she explains dreamily lounging in the couch with her eyes closed and her head back.

"So what happened?" Castle asks breathlessly. He wasn't even aware that he was half standing in front of her with his hands full of the trash she'd thrown on the floor and was almost holding his breath.

She looks at him and giggles. "Sorry Rick, didn't know I had that much of your attention. So I do the frisk like we're taught, arms, hands, armpits, bust, bra, trunk, legs and..." she stops.

"_AND?_" he begs.

"I found his gun." she says smiling.

"You did? You found... wait what? _His_ gun?"

"Yup, Mike knew the guy, he was a a well-known transvestite. The two of them were doubled over laughing. Mike's cracking jokes almost unable to breath. _Beckett! What caliber is that gun?_ He almost pissed himself he was laughing so hard. The 'woman'" Kate says making the quotes in the air "swerved because she saw the police car and has a thing for cops." she remembers fondly.

Castle's laughing too now, just about unable to see he's laughing so hard and with his hands full of the trash. "Oh that's too funny!" he squeaks out.

"You'd think so but at the time it surly wasn't. I wasn't a school-girl but still, to have found _it_ like that was a startling event. I was _bright_ red for a couple of hours. The woman was very nice and polite and told Mike that if he didn't stop laughing at me she wasn't going to invite him over to her parties any more. He didn't even blink, just kept laughing. Mike was writing notes after the stop and he says _'Oh crap, I didn't ask, was his gun loaded?'_ and other stuff like that."

"I wonder how many tricks he decided to _not_ play on you. I'd love to have heard that list." Rick says packing up the briefcase and putting it next to the couch.

"I'm sure you would!" She says sounding slightly relieved. "I don't think there was a _single trick_ he didn't play on me. Oddly enough some of them did help." she says, still reclining in the couch with her eyes closed.

"How so?" Castle asks as he lifts her feet, twists her in her seat and sits down so her legs are in his lap.

"Well, as an example. That stop, it thickened my skin a little. I wasn't so shocked to find that I was frisking a guy after that. Then there was... " she stops speaking and let's out a lowing groan as he starts to massage her feet. "Castle" she groans huskily "If you keep doing that I might let you have your way with me." she says softly sliding into the well of contentment only to have him suddenly stop.

"Hey! Why'd you stop?" she asks.

"Because you stopped talking." he smiles back at her and starts to rub again.

"Okay, I'll try... to... keep..." she murmurs with her eyes closed as he stops again "Okay! I'll keep talking!"

"Good. I may be cheap but I'm not free." he says smiling only to be met with her narrow-eyed stare and "Oh Yeah?" written all over her face.

"You were saying?" he prompts.

"Well, this one time, we got called on a domestic. They're the worst because you never know what you're going to find, it's like trying to safely light a candle in a gasoline tank. So we show up, knock on the door and it swings open. The guy's on top of his wife choking her and Mike _pulls_ him off of her and _throws_ him backwards towards me. The lesson this time was, know what's behind you in case you get thrown off balance suddenly." she explains.

"I grab the guy by the shoulders and push him against the wall. As I'm pulling one of his arms up, to hold him, his other hand grabs my crotch, when I yell at him and reach for that hand to pull it up, his other hand, the first one, grabs my boob. Of course there's a half inch of Kevlar between me and his hand but none the less, it's not polite." she smirks.

"Gawd Castle, how do you know exactly where to dig like that?" she moans at his ministrations on her feet.

"And the lesson there would be?"

"So, um... oh yeah, lesson. Your personal space is gone and anything that happens is not personal. This guy knew he wasn't going to get anything with either grab but he wanted to prove a point because I was a cop. I proved mine by whacking his head into the wall and fracturing his nose."

She continues to recount the story "So far this whole call has gone normally. Mike talks to the wife and discusses what happened. I drag the leech out into the hall to get his side of it. He's screaming at me about my being a bitch and some other not-so-nice things when I pin him against the wall again."

She takes a sip of her wine and then continues "So here I am, I'm encouraging him to be calm and quietly tell me his side of the story when I hear Mike yelp and the woman comes running out with a broom over her head. I figure she's going to try and kill the guy I have pinned. Nope, I was wrong. She's screaming at _me_ at the top of her lungs to leave her man alone and she takes a swing at me with the broom."

"Lucky for me she had a lousy angle so it didn't hurt but the second swing she was winding up for was definitely going to. So, I turned and put the leech in front of me. The broom came down on his head and broke the broomstick. She's screaming apologies to her baby that she hurt him and blaming me. Mike comes out laughing his ass off. He did that a _lot_. He grabs her and forces her back inside..."

After a reasonable pause he stops massaging her feet again.

"Okay okay! Sheesh! Can't a girl just enjoy a foot massage? So, anyway, we end up busting the two of them for assaulting us. Turns out she bit Mike's wrist, that's how she got away from him. The abuse charges were just thrown in for good measure. Mike said it wasn't abnormal to have the woman, bloodied and bruised by her man jump to his defense when the cops show up."

"So what was the lesson there?" Rick asks still rubbing her feet.

"Oh. The lessons were a reminder that in a domestic, there are no victims, they're all combatants. You have to treat everyone as if they're guilty for your own protection. The other lesson is that Mike will laugh at _anything._" then after a sullen pause she corrects it "Did. Mike _did_ laugh at anything. Y'know Castle, of _all_ the people other than my Mom who I've lost, I think his death bothers me the most. Probably because I never got to apologize for having to arrest him."

Castle stops his massaging her feet and bodily pulls her by the legs so she's sitting in his lap and he relishes the girlish giggle she gives off.

He looks her square in the eye "Kate, I was there. He knew _precisely_ what happened. He handed _you_ the cuffs and told you to do your duty. He didn't hold that against you and you could see it in his face. He actually seemed to take some solace in it being you who arrested him. As a matter of fact, based on what I know about him, I think he'd have been a _lot_ more disappointed if you _hadn't done_ what you were supposed to do." he says giving her a squeeze with his arms around her shoulders.

"There you go again. You really need a warning system so we know when you're going to turn on the adult like that." she says giving him a peck on the lips. "You might be right but it will always nag me."

"Don't give me that crap Katherine Beckett, I know what's really bothering you." he says sternly.

"What?" she asks a little surprised.

"You're just ticked off because you'll never get a chance to get him back for the woman with the gun or anything else he did to you!"

"Okay, you got me there Castle, _that_ disappointment will fester for a while." she says smiling. Then looking pensive she quietly muses "I suppose, the silver lining is that him and his penchant for practical jokes will never get to join forces with that nine-year-old on a sugar rush that I'm saddled with." and as she finishes the statement, she grabs Castle by the sides and tickles him.

"Oh, the fun we'd have had at your expense. He'd have had a field day with that Nikki Heat thing earlier." he growls as he leans her backwards onto the couch for a passionate kiss.

"Yeah but then me, Alexis and Martha would have to pay you back and I'm sure we'd get Lanie on our side so you'd be done for either way." she mumbles into his mouth.

"I'll cry 'uncle' now and declare victory. It's easier that way." He laughs then he looks at her beautiful eyes and asks "Hey, you stayin' the night?"


	7. Leave the letters, take the canoodle

"I wasn't planning on it but I think I'd like to." she answers with peck on the lips.

"Okay, good." he answers, now leering at her "Got anything in particular you'd like to do to pass the time?" he asks wiggling his eye-brows.

She slowly pulls him down so his lips are almost touching hers and whispers "As a matter of fact, I do!" and then rolls him onto the floor with a quick flip.

"Oooof!" he lets out as he lands on his back with her on top of him smiling. "Detective Beckett! Are you trying to take advantage of me?" he mock protests.

"I'm _so sorry! No!_ No I wasn't." she quickly answers apologetically and gets up off of him on the floor.

"_**No no no! Don't leave!**_" he panics only to see her standing over him and smirking.

"Gotcha!" she says with a little fist pump.

Rolling over, knocking her legs out from under her and then catching her as she falls squealing like a little girl, he breathes in her face "You sure do."

The two are canoodle on the floor like silly teenagers when Kate suddenly sits back on her heels "Rick..." she's biting her lip again and looking worried.

"What's up Kate?" he asks sitting up with her now.

"Would you mind..." she starts to say.

"No I wouldn't." he interrupts.

"You don't even know what I was going to ask!" She says firmly with her hands on her hips.

"Actually, I think I _do_ but I don't care what you were going to ask, the answer is yes, whatever the question." he says smiling.

She stares into those blue eyes and just smiles back at him. She puts her hand on his cheek "Remind me how I got you again?" she asks warmly.

"I called my friend the mayor and had him order your boss to order it despite your loud and vehement objections." he smirks at her.

"Oh yeah. Now I remember." she says. "That damn Roy." she finishes with a slight wink.

"Anyway... Back to the situation at hand, you were going to ask me if I'd help you write that letter and get those envelopes into tomorrow's mail." he says smiling and stretching out on the floor.

"How?" she sits staring at him "What the? How the _hell_ could you have guessed _that_?"

"Because my dear Ms Beckett, you're not the only observant one in this relationship." he smirks at her as he gets up off the floor and offers her his hand.

"Well Mr Castle you're just full of surprises aren't you."

"Only when properly motivated." he says with a sly look on his face. "Why don't you get us refills of that wine while I get prepared and we'll compose that letter right now."

"You're on Mister Writer-Man!" she giggles walking over to get the glasses and, seeing him turn towards his desk, she swats him on his backside and scoots out of the room laughing. Little does she realize, he'd do anything to hear that laugh from her for the rest of his life.

He grabs his laptop and he sits on the couch waiting for her to return. He fires up his word processor and gets ready to compose with his muse. He hears her call out from the other room. "Do you think I should worry about using my own address or phone number with these people?"

"What do you mean?" he calls back to her only to be surprised by her walking in carrying the glasses.

"Well, I don't know who these people are and in the interest of safety, would it be smart of me to use the 12th's address instead of my home?" she asks hesitantly.

"We'll use my lawyer's address. I just have to call Dewey to let him know what we're doing. As for the phone number, we'll use his too, his office can connect the contact to you directly without releasing your phone number." he says smugly.

"Have you got an answer for everything?" she asks sliding onto the couch next to him.

"Everything but one." he answers confidently.

"What's that?" she asks nonchalantly unawares of his pending answer.

"You, Katherine Beckett, you." he says softly kissing the side of her head as she pauses with her wine halfway to her mouth, blushing a little and smiling.

"Come on writer man, you're wasting time, let's get this done." she announces.

"In a hurry?"

"Yes." she replies with a wink.

"Okay, what would you like to say?" he asks flexing his fingers over the keyboard like a pianist preparing for a concert.

"Why don't just I trust your judgement on this?" Kate answers while she pulls her feet up under her and leans on Rick's shoulder.

"Well! This confirms what I've always thought."

"Ahhhh... What's that?" she asks taking a sip of her wine.

"_You_ my lovely detective, think _I_ have judgement! Ha! Gotcha!" he crows with childish glee as he starts his fingers flying over the keyboard.

"Child!" she murmurs as she waits for him to finish.

"Ta-da!" he announces suddenly.

"Really? That fast?" she asks as she struggles to sit up and look at his screen.

"Yeah, sorry it took so long. I had to write it twice."

"Seriously?"

"Umm... yeah. Ahem... _Pro_-fessisonal _writer_? Remember?" he says with a glint in his eye, then he leans over to her and whispers "_Your_ writer."

"You're going to make me pay for this for weeks and weeks aren't you." she smirks hugging his arm.

"No, that'd be a _silly_ thing to do. I can milk this for _months_."

"Okay, sounds good. Enough of the clever banter, let's get this done before the wine takes over. What do you have?"

"We'll individually address each letter and we'll put your name and lawyer's address at the top but the body says..." he clears throat "_Dear blabla. I hope this letter finds you well. I was a friend of the late Michael Royce. I recently came into possession of some of his belongings and found the enclosed, sealed and addressed envelope Mike had intended to mail. I felt it was in everyone's best interest to provide this cover letter to you and forward on to you the letter unopened. Should you ever need to contact me for any reason, I may be reached at the above address or phone number. Sincerely, Detective Katherine Beckett bla bla bla._"

"Okay, so I might have to be nice to you for this after all. That's a good letter. I'm sold. Let me get the names and addresses off of his letters." she says getting up to retrieve the case and letters.

* * *

A little while later, rummaging around in the office she calls out "Okay Rick, where are you hiding your envelopes?"

"Over there, on the bottom. No, the other... Wait, don't bother, I'll get them while you check and sign these letters I just printed. Here, you can even use your new Mont-Blanc pen." he laughs standing up and passing by her running his hand across her backside.

"You just wanted an excuse to do that." she laughs.

"I _always_ want to do that." he answers without turning.

Walking back to the desk with the envelopes in hand, he puts them down, walks behind her standing at the desk reading one of the letters. Grabs her by the hips and pushes her over in front of his chair and then into the seated position. "I don't want to hear objections. SIT!" he says firmly "I don't care if you like it, _you sit_ in this chair."

She lets out a groan but doesn't say a word. Smiling she pulls the letters over in front of her, signs them, folds them into thirds, then using a small bit of adhesive tape, sticks them to the matching envelope of Mike's. "Hey, what do we do about postage?"

"I'll take care of that tomorrow. I'll go to the post office and send them myself and pay for the postage right then. I will also get a return-receipt for them so we know they have been delivered to their destinations. That way we know that you've done your part faithfully." he offers as he lines up the larger envelopes for her to address with the associated letter.

"While you do that I'll email Dewey and let him know what we're doing. When you're done there we'll send him a list of names so he'll know who's calling or writing, if they ever do." he says sitting down on the couch with his laptop. He can still see how uncomfortable she is in his chair out of the corner of his eye.

"Thank Dewey for me Rick." she adds.

"I will but since he's on retainer, he's already been thanked and very handsomely I might add." he answers lightly while typing away.

"That's it, the last of them has been done." she says sitting back looking at the small pile of envelopes on the desk in front of her. "I know it is silly but I wish I could do more for him than just this final act."

"Kate. You are. You just don't see it. You're keeping his memory alive and telling his stories. You're also handling things like his business card case without his family seeing it. You're also going to try and get that family memento back to them. Quite frankly dear, I think the thing that Mike would appreciate more than _anything_ is the knowledge that you don't hold his mistake against him and that you still cared enough to fight for him." Rick explains, speaking in his serious 'dad' voice.

"Well, that's something I guess. Maybe you're right. Either way, it is what is is." she says quietly.

"Okay! I've sent my email to Dewey and I'll send him the list of names in the morning before I mail them." he says closing his laptop with a click and putting it on the couch next to him. Looking at the lovely woman across the room, he drinks in her visage for a while before getting up and offering her his hand. "Are you ready to turn in dear? You've had a busy day."

She looks up into those blue pools of love and kindness and smiles. "Yes. Yes I am." she answers taking his hand, standing up and walking around the desk. "I might need to do some exercises to get properly sleepy though, do you want to help?"

"_Yippee!_" he squeals. "Oh, sorry. Was that too enthusiastic?"

"Nope, just right!" she answers hitting the switch for the lights in the office, turning around and pulling him by the arms into the bedroom.

* * *

_**Author's note:**_  
About the thing with his chair. See my story "Moby's last moments" I believe Kate would _still_ have reservations about sitting in _that_ chair.


	8. Go see Helen

"Okay, that _does_ it." Castle announces as he shakes the water off his coat. "Would you _please_ put in a request that we only get called out to crime scenes when it's sunny out? This torrential downpour crap is making a mess of my clothes."

Without even looking up Beckett effortlessly replies "I'll get _right_ on that super-star. Hey Ryan!" she calls out "Do you know who to address that request to?"

"As a matter of fact I do Detective Beckett." he answers without skipping a beat, still working on his paperwork on his desk.

"You do?" Castle says surprised, looking at Ryan "Okay, who?"

"You need to see Ms Waite in operational planning." Ryan explains followed quickly by the punchline from Esposito "Yeah, just go to Helen Waite." he says to furious laughter from everyone around him.

"Walked right into that." Castle says closing his eyes at his own credulousness.

"Face first, me bucko." Ryan smirks.

"Yeah well, I asked for it I guess."

"You _guess?_" Esposito questions. "Bro', you hung the target on your forehead for that one."

"Okay, I'll pay my penance, you two want fresh coffees?" he asks the guys.

"Please!" Ryan and Esposito answer in unison.

"Two kiddie coffees and one for the adult." he says as he disappears into the break room.

"Hey Beckett, you don't think he thinks he's the adult do you?" Ryan asks without looking up from his work.

"Ryan, if he comes back to that desk without a coffee for her, she'll pepper-spray him _on the spot_." Esposito and his partner laugh.

"Beckett, do you have that case file for the Russian guy with only two vowels in his name?" Ryan asks.

"Yup, got it right here, do you want it?" she asks holding it behind her towards Ryan without turning around.

"Yes please. Thank you." he says leaning over and taking it from her.

"Okay Detective, one extra hot, extra strong coffee for the lady." he says putting the coffee down in front of her. "And one for each of you. Ryan, would you pass that back?" he says handing the two cups to the detective.

"Toldya." Esposito smirks as he takes the cup from Ryan.

"By the way Beckett, I got an email from Dewey, the last of those return-receipts came in this morning so all of Mike's letters have been delivered." Castle says as he sits down next to her desk with his coffee.

"It took long enough, what's it been, almost three weeks now?" she wonders out-loud.

"I think so. Did you ever reach any of his family?"

"The addresses I had weren't good anymore so I've put in a request through Lanie to the funeral home who handled..." she pauses, searching for the right word "him." she says ending the sentence reverently.

"Okay, well, you've done your duty."

"Yeah. And thanks again."

"No need to thank me. _So_, where are we with this case?" he says changing the topic to keep her from dwelling on it.

Ryan answers with "We're up a brown creek without a paddle."

Smiling incredulously Rick looks at him and with a snarky attitude repeats "Brown Creek?" then, the realization dawns on him and the smile goes away "Oh yeah, sorry, I forgot what you said once. Catholic School." only to be met by a nod from Ryan and a head-shake from Esposito.

"That car we were looking for turns out to not have been involved. So we're still searching." Esposito informs him.

"Hey Ryan." Castle asks staring at the murder board "Did you ever figure out _why_ they were on that fire-escape to begin with?"

"Ummm..." Ryan says shuffling a few papers "Yes, the witness says he was in his mother's apartment when he saw a shadow go by the window, he raised the blinds, saw the guy going up the ladder so he opened the window and went after him shouting. He said the guy pulled the knife, they fought, he got the knife away, sliced the guy's arm and he fell to his death."

"Oh." Castle says sounding dejected.

Looking at the board Esposito challenges the question, "Why do you ask?"

Castle shrugs his shoulders and says "I don't know. It just popped into my head."

"Hey! Wait a second!" Esposito says jumping up to look at the board closer. "If his story is right, then why didn't the victim have mud on his sneakers. The entire area around that building is being dug up, there's an inch of mud all around it!"

Quickly Ryan reopens the folder and says "The CSU report shows that the dumpster our vic' landed on was clean of mud so he only could get onto it from the fall. They also report all the other windows to the fire-escape show as being locked."

Esposito, now excited says "_Wait a second_, one of the Uni's told me something..." as he quickly goes to his desk and opens his notebook thumbing through the pages "Yeah, here it is! This officer said that he slipped coming in the front door because the floor was wet from a coat hung on the back of the door!"

Ryan, now syncing up with Esposito's train of thought looks at him and says, in a questioning voice "So, if this guy was in _all day_ as he claims then why was his coat soaked?"

"Exactly!" Esposito spouts just before he and Ryan do their fist bump thing.

"Good catch Espo!" Beckett says. "I think we finally have a hole in his story. Why don't you re-interview him, I think he's still in the box. You found it, you chase it."

"With _pleasure_!" Esposito says enthusiastically grabbing his notebook. "Come on bro', let's close this one." he says to Ryan as he heads for the interview room.

"Kate, if you don't mind, I'm going to observe." Castle says standing up.

"Okay but I'll remind you again. No yelling or banging on the window." she says with a smirk.

"I am _never_ going live that down." he mumbles as he turns and heads to the observation room.

* * *

Forty-five minutes later, Ryan and Esposito exit the interview room giving each other a high-five followed by Castle from the observation room. "Nice job guys." Castle gives them for congratulations as they head to their desks.

"You got him?" Beckett asks Ryan since he's first out the door.

"Nope, Espo did." Ryan says proudly. "Javi caught a whiff of something and went after it and got him to confess. It turns out he lured the guy there for a few beers and movies, when the storm let up a bit, he suggested they light up a joint out on the fire escape and when he got the guy out there, attacked him with the knife then tossed him over the railing onto the dumpster. All over twenty bucks."

"Nice job there guys! Espo, you put your name on it. You and Ryan deserve the credit." She says holding out the file for him.

"Thanks Beckett." he grins taking the folder and preparing to write it up.

"Well, one more in the closed column Detectives." Castle says sitting back in his chair.

"Yup, one more bad-guy off the street." she adds.

Suddenly, the calm is pierced by "**_Detective Beckett, when you have a moment._**" Gates calls from her doorway.

"_Right now sir." _She calls back as she stands.

"What'd you do?" Ryan whispers loudly.

"Dunno." is all she can answer on her way to the office.

The three men stare at her back as she heads into the office and Gates closes the door behind her. They all see Beckett sit and then Gates closes the blinds blocking their view.

"I hope she's not in trouble again." Ryan says quietly.

"Well, if she is, you know it's Castle's fault." Esposito adds.

"What the... Why me?" Castle turns around and asks the two, startled by the accusation.

Both of them, instead of answering, stare at him then look down at their work shaking their heads knowing that they've got him worried and they are milking it for what they can.

"Guys?" he asks of the two with no response.

A few minutes later, the door opens and Beckett exits the captain's office.

"Here she comes." Ryan announces gently.

Castle, for what, to him, seemed to be an eternity, has run every worst-case scenario through his writer's mind. The strain of the guilt and pain of each scenario showing on his face as she sits down and starts to do paperwork again.

"_Well?"_ Castle begs, the suspense obviously eating at him.

The other two detectives look up for the answer too.

"Oh, sorry." she says as if she forgot "I have an appointment downtown at four this afternoon to meet with a superior court judge."

"Oh crap, what'd you do?" Castle is almost ready to wet himself in anticipation now that his writer's mind has been kicked into high-gear.

"I don't know." Kate answers sincerely. "I just know I'm not in trouble."

"Oh good." Castle sighs in relief sitting back in his chair.

"At least not yet. I don't know what it's about but she said to not worry so, not much I can do about it for another..." looking at her watch "hour and a half."

"Well, good luck no matter what." Esposito offers.

"Thanks Espo."

"Beckett, will you call or text us afterwards to let us know everything's okay?" Ryan asks.

"Sure will Ryan." Then, more seriously. "Don't worry guys. You're not getting promotions that easy."

"Do you want me to come with you?" Castle asks quietly.

"Why? Do you mean I might actually be able to shake you from my tail for once?" she says smiling at him.

"Cute. No, really." He insists.

"Actually, your presence is requested too. Don't worry either. She was smiling when she me told all of this." Kate says to him. "Now, if you'll give me the chance, for the next hour I'd like to finish some of this work I have."

"Will do." he says pulling out his phone and starting another game of Angry Birds.

The four comrades-in-arms sit in relative silence doing their work, well, three of them are working, until the calm is broken by Kate's phone beeping. She picks it up and looks at it. "Three-Thirty. Time for me to go." she announces.

"If you need anything you let us know." Ryan offers.

"Thanks Kev. I think it will be fine. Castle, you ready to go?" she asks.

"Yes I am detective, at your disposal."

"Okay, let me get my stuff and we're out of here." she says not noticing he's already standing behind her holding her coat out for her.

"So, any bets on what this meeting might be about?" he asks.

"Down boy. I don't think we're going to find this a big deal. Gates was too calm." she admonishes.

"Well, time will tell." he concedes as they head for the elevator.

* * *

_**Author's note:**_  
Just in case it escapes anyone, due to late nights, lack of coffee, language differences, my crappy writing, etc. the name "Helen Waite" is pronounced like "Hell-and-wait".


	9. Out of the fryingpan

_**Author's note:**_  
A special thanks to phnxgrl for her help with this chapter. It has been stuck in the mud and she graciously agreed to help me gain some traction. Not to mention some spot-on editing corrections.

* * *

"Well, this is going to be different." he observes as they walk down the marble halls. The click of her heels echoing loudly as they shake off their raincoats.

"Why?" Kate cocked her head to look at her companion.

"Just because it's something we've not done before." he says smiling, still looking up and around instead of ahead.

She stops suddenly right in front of him and turns on him. "Rick."

"Yeah?" he answers still unfocused.

She leans in to his space "Richard!" to secure his attention.

"Huh? What?" he says now looking into her eyes.

"Rick, I'm not scolding you when I say this. Please be on your best behavior. I don't know what we're about to get into but people like this are notorious for having _no_ sense of humor, okay?" she says almost pleading.

"I'm sorry Kate, yes, I'll be all business especially for you." he says with a smile. There was a sudden change in her companion. She could see in his posture, the child has been replaced by the adult.

"Thank you Rick." she says giving his arm a squeeze. "Let's get this over with." she says as she turns and heads for the judge's office.

She takes deep breath, reaches out, opens the door and strides in with Castle in her wake. "I'm Detective Kate Beckett. I was told the Judge asked to see me." she says holding out her badge.

"Yes Detective, if you would wait a moment, I'll let the Judge know you're here." The young woman says.

Castle watches her as she gets up and goes to an office door. Beckett watches him watching the woman. He's not leering it's the writer in him. He's inventorying her characteristics, watching her smart step, her perfect attire and the way she moves.

"The Judge will see you now." The woman states holding the door open for them.

"Thank you." Kate says passing her.

"Your Honor. I'm Detective Beckett. I was told you asked to see me." she says assuming a slightly formal pose with Rick slightly behind her to her left.

"Yes. Sit." He says not even looking up from the papers he's reading. The judge is an older man with gray hair, gold rimmed glasses and signs of a few too rich meals. His bearing reflects the gravity of the position he holds.

Not even looking up from his papers, he asks "Detective, do you know why you're here?"

She glances at Castle then back to the judge "No Your Honor, I don't. My Captain said be here and here I am. That's all I know." she answers coolly and calmly.

The judge looks up and loudly barks "Who are you and why are you here?" at Castle.

"Your Honor, he's my partner. Richard Castle." Beckett answers.

"Partner...? He's a _damn writer_ and not a very good one at that! I asked to see the Detective, not her and her puppy. Get out." he orders Castle as he stands up behind his desk.

"No Your Honor." Beckett states coldly catching Castle in mid motion of beginning to stand.

"_What did you just say to me?_" The judge asks her and walks around his desk to confront them.

"I said _No_ Your Honor. He's _not_ leaving. He's my _partner_." Beckett challenges, now standing up and looking the judge squarely in the eye.

"Do you have _any_ idea of who the hell I am Detective?" he snaps furiously. This is obviously someone who always gets his way and isn't used to being told 'No'.

"Only by title sir, you are a New York Superior Court Judge..." she answers.

"_Exactly..._" He snaps ready to sink his teeth into her.

"Who's acting like a petulant twelve-year-old... Your Honor." Beckett finishes.

"Do you know that I can have you thrown in jail for contempt of court?" he loudly threatens with no subtly.

"Yes you can Your Honor and I know that the charge won't stick and will do nothing but make the situation worse. Your Honor, if you wish to speak to me privately, you'll need to explain why I'd exclude my partner." She says with a glint of steel in her eyes.

"Partner...? He's not a cop! He's a civilian writer on a field trip. He has _no_ business here." the judge bellows.

"Your Honor." she starts gently fixing him with an even gaze "That man has saved my life _multiple_ times. He has _earned_ the _right AND _the _privilege_ to work at my side as my equal and _partner_. Judge, that man has done more to earn the respect, confidence and loyalty of my fellow officers than many seasoned professionals, including some judges... Your _Honor_." she finishes carefully including the required honorific. "And Judge? If he leaves, this meeting is over unless you have a _very_ good reason why it shouldn't be."

Smiling now, the judge addresses her directly with a cold, harsh stare. "Do you know that most people would have crapped themselves and caved a long time ago? You didn't blink. How come?" he asks, now more like a grandfather than a predator.

"I... ah... Well, to be quite honest, you don't scare me. My history is clean so there are no skeletons in my closet. I hunt, fight and interrogate murderers for a living. I assume that I'm not here by accident so that means you've probably looked into who I am. That means you already know that I got a bullet through my heart and died on the operating table so, _really_, what do I have to be scared of? Your Honor." She says matter-of-factly surprised at the one-eighty his attitude has taken.

The judge roars with laughter, "I like you, you're alright! You're made of stern stuff Detective. I'd love to play poker against you." he smiles.

"No you wouldn't." Castle counters.

"_Castle!_" Kate hisses at him.

"No?" the judge asks looking amused and raising his eyebrows at Rick.

Castle, with a proud smile explains, "No Your Honor, just ask Judge Markaway. She's cleaned him out last two times they played."

"Castle." she sighs quietly.

"Now I _know_ I like you." the Judge declares "That damn Markaway always seems to beat me. That man has luck with cards I can't fathom."

Turning and heading around his desk, now smiling he says "Detective Beckett and Mister Castle, _Please_ sit and relax. I'm done trying to be a jerk, or should I say a petulant twelve-year-old."

"Mister Castle, it seems that you're an integral part of what makes Detective Beckett work so well." the judge says cheerily now.

"Thank you Your Honor but no, that's not the case. I may contribute to it but it is her skill and dedication coupled with that of her team, which I'm proud to be a small part of, that makes her who she is." Castle says firmly.

"Well Detective, it seems that you've got a cheerleader." the judge says in surprise. Turning serious he addresses the two "Now... Before we continue, Mister Castle and Detective Beckett, the conversations we are having in this room are privileged. No one outside of the three of us knows about the content of this meeting or will be told until further notice. Am I clear?" he looks her square in the eye "Detective?"

"Yes Judge, clear." she answers.

"Mister Castle?" the Judge asks fixing him with a penetrating stare.

"You are clear Your Honor." Castle answers unambiguously.

"Good good. May I call you Richard and Katherine?" the judge asks, his bearing softening.

"Just Kate is fine Judge." she says.

"Rick is good for me Your Honor." Castle says.

"Very good! Well Detective Beckett, sorry, Kate, I've dragged you down here for an important reason." The judge says pausing to assess the two of them.

Kate can see the twitch in Castle's hands. He is bubbling with anticipation and energy but controlling it for her.

"This meeting is an informal, shall we say _exploratory_ conversation. I want to talk to you about something I'm involved in and see what your opinions are about it." The judge begins to explain.

"I'm listening Judge." Beckett says evenly.

"I'm glad. This meeting is a first of many steps to see if you'd make a good special instructor at the police academy." he says only to be met by a startled cough from Castle.

The judge turns a curious gaze at Castle "I'm sorry Mister Castle, does that surprise you?" he challenges.

"Actually, yes Your Honor. I'm surprised because the idea never occurred to me." Castle says beaming.

"Do you think it would be a good match?" The judge asks him.

Exuberantly Castle starts to explain "Judge, I think it might just be the best idea I've ever heard. She'd be a phenomenal instruct..."

"_Ahem!_" she interrupts. "Do _I_ have any say in the matter?" she says looking at Castle then back to the judge still not sure of what to make of this guy with the Jekyll and Hyde switch.

"Of course you do. This is not a draft board. I'm just making sure that I'm talking to the right person." The judge says coolly.

"So Your Honor, not to look 'a gift horse in the mouth' but I'd like to ask how this all came about." Beckett asks.

"Here." The judge says handing her a folder from his desk.

She opens it then sucks in a deep breath. She blinks to clear her vision and then she begins to read the contents.

Concerned, Castle leans over and asks "Kate? What is it?"

"One..." she chokes out and clears her throat "One of those letters we found of Mike's. It seems that it ended up here. The letter..." she trails off wiping her eyes and reading more of the letter.

"I'll summarize for you Rick." the judge offers. "Her friend Mike Royce did some really huge and _very_ special favors for someone who is very important to me. This letter calls in all those favors as one. It seems that Mike used all of that good will and good karma he earned as one single favor. This favor wasn't for himself, mind you, but for the good Detective here. Mike suggests that she be considered for a special position within the academy teaching what might be called a 'Master Class'."

The judge continues his explanation while Kate reads and absorbs everything. "In his letter to me, Mike explains that he feels that the skills Kate has, while impressive, could be magnified by her training others in the field and improving the overall police force. As he puts it in his letter, her closure rate, while impressive, is singular. It is one team. If she could teach other teams to do the job half as well as her team does, it would significantly multiply the impact she has." as he finishes he turns and looks to Beckett, waiting for her to finish absorbing the impact.

"Top Gun." Castle says under his breath.

"Mister Castle...?" The judge asks surprised.

"I'm very sorry Your Honor, it popped out. Judge, what you're looking to create sounds like the definition of the original Top Gun program that the Navy has. You take the cream of the crop from the ranks and put them into specialized intensive training to make them better. They then go back to their units and make the teams they're on better and because of that influence the teams continue to grow and improve." Castle explains.

"Very good Rick, that's exactly right. That's _precisely_ what we're talking about." the judge says smiling. "My petulant act earlier was to see if Kate was all that Mike said she was. I had serious doubts that he'd crow about someone as much as he did her and still not have embellished. It seems he was right on the money. I could see it in her eyes, she knew the ground she stood on and didn't give an inch." he says now leaning back against his desk.

It takes a moment for Kate to regain her composure.

"Your Honor... I don't know what to say." she starts.

"Detective... Kate. Before you continue." the judge interrupts "What I am discussing with you is part of a larger initiative involving the police academy. I am part of an advisory group who helps to keep the training and objectives relevant and up-to-date, some would call it a steering committee. I'm not asking for your answer now nor am I offering you a position _yet."_

"The job descriptions are being written by a committee right now. I'm discussing it with you to see how you feel about it and to assess if you could truly be all that Mike said you are. This letter from Mike arrived at a point in the process before anyone else has even been approached about joining this new program. Normally a group would select prospective instructors and work out the details. However, because of this letter, its arrival at this particular time, and with your approval of course, your name would go to the top of the list for selection and interviews." He concludes.

Sitting down behind his desk and fiddling with something in his desk he explains "Mike knew the things I was involved in with the academy and that is the reason that letter came to me albeit almost two years later. What Mike didn't know was how truly timely this letter is. Two years ago, this would have given me an idea without a proper outlet for your talents Kate but because of the delay in arrival we have already established the foundation onto which we plan to build and you fit into that plan perfectly."

Silently, Beckett nods at him. Rick can see her fighting for control of her emotions, her compartmentalization skills are being put to the test.

After giving her a moment to absorb what she can, the judge continues "This is a discussion about creating a _new_ position in the academy. Although it will mean less crazy hours spent responding to phone calls in the middle of the night. It may very well require as much hard work. You'd work with teams developing and teaching targeted curricula for these programs. If we carry Mike's point forward, your reach could cross the entire city with detectives trained by you being more efficient and effective. This would allow you to make a more significant impact than a lifetime spent behind your desk." he says putting something away.

"Your Honor, may I ask how you know... sorry, _knew_ Mike?" Beckett asks gently, still unsure of this man.

The judge gets up from his desk and walks across his office to the water cooler and gets a small cup of water to take a pill. "I don't blame you for your hesitation Kate, not one bit. You don't know me and my act earlier probably put our relationship back a few notches. I knew Mike Royce a long time ago. We started on the force together. Mike and I were partners for a short time. We were green and full of piss and vinegar. We were going to clean up this city single handedly." he pauses as he drinks his water.

"May I ask what changed that?" Beckett asks.

Throwing the cup in the trash, he takes off his glasses and begins wiping them with his handkerchief. "I don't mind. That was a long time ago and I believe you won't go publishing it in Mister Castle's next book." he says with a little laugh "Mike and I had a falling out because we were too much of one mind."

"I... I don't understand Judge." says Beckett, digging for more information "Why would that cause a falling out?"

Speaking in a far away manner, he explains "We both thought _exactly_ the same, we knew what the other was thinking before either of us could say it. We even knew when the other was going to do something truly stupid. And let me tell you Detective, Mike and me, we did do some _truly_ stupid things. The problem was, we didn't have what he called a ying-yang relationship. I don't mind saying, we were both really smart, savvy and scared of _nothing._ We had a tendency to allow each other to get in too deep to something we shouldn't."

"Oh." is all Beckett can say. She stares at the judge trying to avoid looking at Castle who she knows has the tiniest of smiles at the corners of his mouth and his eyes are yelling "See, I told you! Ying needs Yang!"

"Don't get me wrong Detective, we were good. Mike and I were holy _terrors_, I truly think that for a while criminals really _would_ shake in their boots when they heard our names." the judge explains proudly before quickly becoming introspective and speaking softly "Then one night, my wife told me she was pregnant. My whole world changed. I grew up abruptly and I realized that I needed to be there for her and my baby. Mike and I talked about being more careful and it... shall we say, it got really ugly. We trashed a bar, caused a traffic jam and bloodied each other very very badly. When Uni's showed up to try and break us up, we..." speaking softly now, the judge, examining his hands continues "we...didn't go quietly and... we put one of them in the hospital. Then we said some things to each other that we shouldn't have and we went our separate ways."

"I'm sorry to hear that Your Honor and pardon me for saying this but it doesn't sound like the Mike Royce I knew, he was my training officer." Beckett says gently but firmly.

"You're right, it wasn't." The judge says looking up at her now. "The Mike Royce you knew was born a couple of years after our fight." As he talks, he walks along the shelves of books on his office wall finally stopping at the large window and looking wistfully off into the distance. "I'd already quit the force and had thrown myself fully into the law." brightening slightly, the judge explains "I decided that if I couldn't clean up this city one way I'd do it another. I passed the bar and began trying to make a difference. That was when we got back in touch with each other. We met for drinks," laughing for a moment he adds "at the _same_ bar we trashed! We talked and talked and talked. We started about three in the afternoon and we closed the place. Peacefully I might add."

The judge turns and heads back to his desk. "We worked out our differences. He finally saw what I had been trying to say, how I wanted to be there for my family. Mike hadn't grown up enough to understand that at the time. He even said as much to me. That was when the Mike Royce you knew was born. He told me how he'd learned to not think of himself as an expendable weapon but as a resource to use and recharge."

"Now _that's_ the Royce I remember Judge." Beckett says smiling "One of his axioms was '_Be the gun, not the bullet.'_ and he was a pain in the ass about it. He taught me to recognize when I needed to step back and recharge."

"He also told me about you a few times." the judge says "He said how smart and strong you were. Mike told me you had good instincts and knew how to use them. He also said you were fearless which I suppose is why you didn't back-down when I challenged you earlier. He also said a few other things, again over _way_ too many drinks, that I really don't want to repeat to your face." he said smiling.

Beckett blushed and sat up trying to retain her composure. "Yup, _that's_ the Mike Royce I remember."

"He also said that you were the best partner anyone could ever hope to get." The judge adds solemnly.

"I'll second that motion Judge." Castle chimes in met by a smile and nod from the judge.

As he sits down at his desk again, the judge becomes slightly more serious, "I wish to reiterate the points I made earlier. First, this is part of a larger process and is not a job offer. I would call it a prescreening. If you tell me you're interested, I'll contact the others who are involved in this project and put your name on the top of the list. It is then that the interviews would begin following which, unless I'm _very_ wrong, a job offer. The difference between you and someone else is that, thanks to Mike, you have the unique opportunity be in on the proverbial ground floor helping to shape and guide the entire process and program."

Leaning back in his huge leather chair he locks eyes with Kate "If I were to read the tea leaves I'd guess that we're about two to three months away from staffing up. That means you're not under the usual stress of deciding immediately. Secondly, although these discussions are confidential you have one person you can talk to Detective, a personal friend of mine who's judgment I respect and value. Victoria Gates. You can speak to her about this but only in somewhat vague terms for now. She's a smart person, she'll probably guess and fill in a number of the blanks herself but without confirmation, she won't say anything. Lastly, that letter from Mike? It doesn't exist. That favor I spoke of? It didn't happen." taking a deep breath, he asks both "Are we clear?"

"Yes sir, clear." Becket and Castle say in unison causing the judge to smile and look at the two.

"Do you two practice that?" he asks, his eyes sparkling with humor.

"We get asked that a lot. No we don't Your Honor." Castle answers with a proud smile.

"I've said my peace. Detective, Kate, do you have anything you'd like to say or questions to ask?"

"Yes... a few things Your Honor. First and foremost, I am beholden to _no one_." she says firmly. "I am not now nor will I ever be."

"Correct, the only one you might consider yourself as being beholden to is Mike Royce himself for this gift to you. Myself and... _others_ are beholden to _him_. We're beholden to Mike for a lot. Discussing this with you is my partial repayment to Mike." the judge explains. "Truth be told, if you're half of what Mike says you are, he's doing me and the department the favor."

"The victims and their families _always_ come first." she states plainly.

"Also understood... If anything, your file screams of your dedication to that rule." he agrees.

"I _don't do politics_. I'm sure everyone says that but I have a great disdain for it. I would not be doing this to be a token on anyone's keyring." she says like she's enumerating a list. "Just for clarification on those three points, I have _absolutely no qualms_ about walking away from my badge if needed."

"Agreed, understood and expected." the judge says sitting back. "Anything else?"

"Yes Judge. If I was to consider such a thing I'd want to be able to continue to work cases occasionally. Is that a viable option?" Kate asks.

"I would expect, should this position come into existence, it would be welcomed for you to keep practicing. It may require that you move up in rank too so factor that into your consideration." He answers.

"Two more things Your Honor." Kate says.

"I'm listening Detective."

"One. Mister Castle's access and privileges with the police department and specifically the twelfth precinct remain intact. Two. His arrangement to be permitted to shadow and work as part of my team be honored and continued. Detectives Esposito and Ryan, among others at the twelfth, have come to regard him as a vital part of _their_ teams and rely on him. I believe it would be severely detrimental should that part be suddenly removed."

"I feel confident that both of those conditions are easily met. Is there anything else?" the judge asks taking Kate's measure.

"None at the moment your honor but I'm sure we'll talk about this again soon." Kate says.

"Sorry to interrupt Judge. May _I_ ask a question?" Castle asks somewhat timidly.

"Of course you can." The judge answers encouragingly.

Rick clears his throat, then quietly speaks "Since these discussions are confidential and don't pass these walls, I need to ask..." he pauses looking at Kate for a moment, and she gives him a gentle nod and he continues "Is Senator Bracken involved in any of this in any form?"

Not flinching, the judge answers quickly "No not at all nor in any way that I'm aware of. As a matter of fact, he's no friend of mine. We don't see eye-to-eye on a _lot_ of things and I'd just as soon never have to deal with him. Most of the people I work with on these initiatives have been severely negatively impacted by his creative budget juggling so I doubt _any_ of them would be a fan. Is this a problem?" The judge asks looking at Kate.

"No sir, just the opposite." Castle answers for her.

Standing up and coming around the desk the judge shakes Kate's hand as she stands. "Kate, you're not being pushed into this nor does this have a short shelf-life. Take your time, consider it carefully, talk to each other." he says nodding towards Castle "Talk to Victoria, she's a wise woman with a lot of experience to offer. I would ask that you give me some indication in the next week what you think and feel about this situation if you say you're interested, I will initiate the process for getting you interviewed properly. Even if you decide to not be involved, I'd value your opinions on it."

"Thank you Your Honor." she says earnestly with a smile.

"Mister Castle, it's been a pleasure meeting you and I'm sorry about the nasty remarks earlier." the judge says extending a hand to him.

"Thank you judge, it was my pleasure. I completely understand." Castle says shaking his hand.

"To tell you the truth Mister... Rick, my wife jokes that she goes to bed with you more often than she does me." the judge laughs.

"I... umm..." Castle stammers wide eyed.

"Don't worry, we laugh about it." he says slapping his back gently.

"Your Honor..." Kate interrupts.

"Yes Kate?" he answers noting the serious tone in her voice.

She steps into the judge's personal space and quietly says "I don't want to know what happened but I'd like to know if Mike finished what he was doing for you."

"Yes. Thankfully he did." he responds quietly.

"Good. I'd honor his commitment to you. I owe him a lot, even before this meeting so please remember that." she finishes and steps back.

"You're a good person Kate, I see why Mike spoke so highly of you." the judge says impressed.

"Thank you very much for your time Your Honor." she says reaching out to shake his hand again.

"Thank you for your time Detective, Mister Castle. My assistant will see you out." he says as he presses a button on his desk and quickly the woman appears in the open door.


	10. Who runs this tilt-a-whirl?

_**Author's Note:**_  
When I read a story and there's this author's note at the beginning that apologizes and explains in detail why there's been a delay in posting a chapter of a story, I always think it seems so weird. I read it and have these conversations with myself about how it has no value in the story and it is out of place, etc. So, here I am putting a note in my story about why it is late in being posted. Please note, the egg on my face isn't cooked and it doesn't go well with crow either.

Yeah, my turn. Work... er... Reality... um... Life, yeah, that's it, life caught up to me and I've been too busy to even read other people's work much less write my own. So, for those that have waited for this story to be updated, my apologies for lack of progress. For those who haven't waited for it to be updated, my apologies for the hubris of assuming someone would be interested.

Thank you for your time. Now on with the show.

* * *

The two companions walk silently back through the marble halls, not even noticing the loud click of her heels this time. Once outside, they stop on the top step of the granite facade. Castle stands next to Beckett, waiting patiently and silently for her to break the quiet trance she's in. She looks out at the city engulfed by rain, _her_ city, _her home_. She looks at the people going about their lives and she wonders. She wonders if she truly _could_ make more of a difference to them. She offers a silent curse and thanks to her mentor and friend Mike Royce.

"Castle?" she asks softly.

"Right here Kate." he says from her side.

"Would you buy me a drink? I _really_ think I need one." she says with a small smile and a very heavy sigh.

"I happen to know the best place for one. They have a special spot reserved just for you." he says wrapping her arm around his as they walk down the stairs.

"Thanks partner." she smiles at him. To him, that's all the thanks he needs.

"_TAXI!"_ he calls out when they get to the edge of the sidewalk.

One quickly stops for them and they climb in. Beckett is about to give the address for the Olde Haunt when Castle gives his loft address instead.

"I think you need some quiet time. We'll go home and let you unwind at my place." He explains.

"Okay. Sounds like a good plan." she answers leaning into his side as he wraps his arm around her shoulder. "Reserved spot huh?" she asks quietly with a smile.

His only answer is to pat her arm and pull her closer and plant a kiss on top of her head.

Leaning on his chest, she reaches into her pocket and pulls out her phone and sends Ryan and Esposito a quick message that everything is okay.

The two ride silently to his address. When they arrive, they wordlessly walk in, their fingers interlocked, a quick nod to the doorman and up the elevator they go. They walk to the door and he opens it for her. He can see relief already spreading in her posture. She knows no one is expecting anything of her right now. She's in a sanctuary of peace for a while and her best friend is guarding the door.

He helps her off with her wet raincoat and to her surprise, he lifts her foot and takes her shoes off. He holds her by the shoulders and walks her toward the master suite and the shower. He turns on the floor heat and cranks up the hot shower for her. Without a word he turns and as he leaves, he dims the lights for her.

She smiles at his considerate actions and how much the little things he does mean. She strips off her clothes and steps into the shower, the hot water melting all the stress and uncertainty in her bones. She stands under the shower-head just letting the rivulets of hot water and steam mesmerize her. She hears a noise and sees the door to the bathroom close again then notices a glass of vodka and a glass of red wine on the shelf outside the shower door. She smiles at the flowing warmth, both outside her and in her heart. She reaches out of the shower, takes the vodka shot and knocks it back feeling the burn as it goes down. Just that little bit has helped push her into calm. She recognizes the taste right away, he got a case of Elit flown in from Moscow just for her. Smiling she replaces the glass and goes back under the shower to soak in the heat.

Again, she hears a noise only to see him putting her big fluffy bathrobe outside the door for her, he picks up her clothes and retreats to the bedroom leaving her alone with her thoughts and ghosts.

Almost a half an hour later, she has turned off the water, toweled off and wrapped herself snugly in the warm bathrobe he left her. She sips more of her wine as she steps out of the bathroom to find her favorite comfortable sweat clothes on the side of the bed waiting for her.

She dresses, takes her wine and leaves the bedroom. She sees him in the kitchen, heating up a bowl of soup for her.

"Hey." she says with a wan smile as she walks to the counter.

"Hey yourself there lady." he answers back warmly. "Grab yourself a seat, I've got some nice hot soup for you, just what the doctor ordered."

"Rick, what'd you think about that meeting?" she asks taking a seat at the counter, watching him buzz around the kitchen for her.

"I was shocked and couldn't believe it." he answers.

"Really?" she asks somewhat surprised and a little disappointed. Suddenly she feels a little hurt, why doesn't he think she'd be a good instructor?

"Yeah, I mean _really_, who'd have thought that _Iron-Gates_ would have _friends_." He finishes the statement staring at her.

"Walked into that one didn't I?" she smiles crinkling her nose at him.

"Consider it payback for Helen Waite." he smiles. Turning serious "Kate, what _I_ think about it doesn't really matter. The question is, what do _you_ think?" he answers quickly.

"Rick, to tell you the truth, I don't know _what_ to think. I have a raging storm of conflicting ideas, opinions, emotions and desires going on in my head and I don't know which end is up. I trust you and I respect your opinion and I'd like to hear what you thought of it all." she sits with her forehead resting on her hands on the counter. "Rick, you know you can't tell me what to do and _I_ know you won't try to make up my mind for me. I would just like to hear your thoughts and opinions on it all while I sift through everything. I'll tell you now" she says sitting back and looking a bit more relaxed "I'm not making a decision about my future right now, I just want to stop the mental tilt-a-whirl."

"Okay but don't make me regret saying this stuff." he cautions her. "To tell you the truth, as soon as he said it I was on-board with it."

"Why? Can you tell me why you like the idea so much?" she asks softly.

He says, "There's a lot of reasons. Let me present it this way..." taking her soup out of the microwave with his bare hands _"HOT! HOT! HOT! __**HOT!**_" putting it in front of her and quickly sticking his hands under the faucet_._

"Don't damage those hands there writer-man. They mean a lot to me." she says with a saucy wink.

"We can discuss the welfare of my hands later. If I think about what I might do with them, our conversation's not going to be governed by my brain." he says running his hands under cold water.

"Okay, you were saying then... And thanks for the soup." she prompts him.

"I was going to say, your future has a finite set of paths to follow. You could quit the force and become a kept woman by some rich and ruggedly handsome writer, that is of course assuming you can find one who can put up with your stubborn streak. Or, you could stay as you are and continue to slowly climb the ladder in the force."

"Hey!" she starts.

He holds up his hand to stop her. "I mean slowly because _nothing_ will keep up with your desire or talents, it'll always be too slow from your perspective."

"That's better." she smiles at him. "As funny as it is, that first choice has never seemed to be an option to me. Lanie keeps shaking her head about it too. She claims it's proof that god has a sense of humor. She got the backpacker and I got the rich guy."

"Just don't talk to Meredith about this, she might actually convince you that it's a legitimate career path." he jokes.

"I promise, I won't." she smiles.

Clearing his throat he touches on their mutual friends' obsession with them. "On the subject of our friend Lanie, we're not even talking about the bull-elephant traipsing around the room which is _our_ future." he says holding up his hand to stop her from saying anything as she opens her mouth and inhales, "I'm _not_ bringing it up right now nor am I asking you to discuss it. The time for that will come. Right now, let's deal with one intimidating, terrifying subject at a time."

He continues as he sits down next to her "As I was saying, you can follow that ladder up, possibly becoming a lieutenant or captain. Let me say now that if that lieutenant downstairs at the twelfth is _any_ indication, I don't like that idea. He's a grumpy old sort. He makes Attila-the-Hun seem warm and fuzzy."

That comment gets her to almost spit out her soup. "Thanks Castle. I always wanted to wear my dinner."

"Am I wrong?" he asks with that voice that seeks confirmation.

"No, you're not. He _is_ a crotchety old cuss." she answers cleaning herself up.

"Or you can become a captain and run the show. You had a great mentor with Roy, he showed you some really good traits to learn from."

"That's true." she answers.

"May I point out what might be obvious?" he asks.

"Sure, point away." she says crumbling some crackers into her soup.

"Correct me if I'm wrong but I think you've only got one or two more rungs on that ladder to climb before you become more and more isolated from the work you do now and you become more and more of a paper-pusher. I'm not saying it is absolute nor is it a bad thing, I'm just pointing out that you have to decide what it is about what you do that you love so much." he explains as he gets up and walks into the living room leaving a noticeable void behind.

"Rick?"

"Yes?" he answers fiddling.

"Rick. Look at me." she implores.

He stops what he's doing and turns to her with his arms crossed on his chest. His whole countenance screaming _brick wall_.

"What aren't you saying? Something's bothering you." she states. "I'd like to hear it."

"No, nothing."

"Bull!" She spits. "_Tell me!_ We have to communicate."

He looks down at his hands holding the dishtowel and begins to rub them. Quietly he states "There's two more paths in that finite future."

"What are they?" she asks but she knows where he's going. She doesn't want to hear it but they have to talk about it.

"One option..." he stops talking and is twisting the towel around in his hands hard then in a voice hardly even a whisper "I don't want to say it."

"Rick, you know who I am and what I do. We have to face it. You were going to say that one option is that I get killed in the line of duty." she says quietly. He doesn't even reply, he nods ever so slightly. She can see the tears on his face. This hurts them both but she feels they have to get it out.

"I don't like it either Rick." She says no longer looking at his face, the pain for both of them too great.

"Kate." comes a hoarse whisper from him "I've already lived through that once. I simply _can not_ do it again." he says sobbing. "I have watched you die a thousand times, _for months_, every time I closed my eyes I relived it. I've only recently been able to push that vision aside, I _can't_ go back there."

She goes to him and wraps her arms around him. "I don't want you to either." she whispers as she holds him tight as he sobs at the memories of her dying in his arms. She can feel the tears soaking her shirt.

Quietly, she adds "And the other option we don't want to talk about is my getting injured and disabled."

She feels him nod at the statement.

"Okay Rick, come on. We've said it. It's out there. We can deal with it." She tries to encourage him and all he does is shake his head and hold her tighter.

After a while, still holding each other tight, both of them have stopped crying, having collected themselves somewhat. She tries to ease her embrace of him and he doesn't let go.

"Rick?" she asks only to have him shake his head again.

"Rick, come on. It's okay. Let's talk." she says.

She feels his grip loosen slightly. "How..." he mumbles shakily "How did others deal with this?" he asks, his face still buried in the crook of her neck.

"Other cops?" she asks a little perplexed.

He just shakes his head.

"You mean other guys I've been involved with?" she quietly asks, answered by a nod.

"The truth?" she asks giving him the chance to avoid it.

"Yeah." he answers, composing himself a little bit.

"It's never been a problem. It's never even been discussed." she says quietly.

"Why not?" he snaps. He's now convinced himself he's being unreasonable or worse, strange.

"You interrupted me. I wasn't finished." She turns her head and whispers into his ear "I'd never had a tomorrow to consider until now." only to be met with another bear hug.

The two stand there, wrapped in each other, comforting each other and supporting the other. Neither one wanting to break the silence, mood, or spell. Until finally she speaks up. "Rick. I'm sorry, you need to let me go."

"No, I don't want to." he mumbles into her neck.

"I'm sorry Rick but you have to." she pleads.

"Why? _Why_ do I have to?" he's almost crying again.

"Because I'm going to pee on both of us if I don't get to the bathroom _NOW!_" she asserts.

"Oh." is all he can say as he lets her go and turns away so she can't see he'd been crying thinking the worst again as she hurries to the bathroom.


	11. Cue the Rod Serling voiceover!

"Whew! That was close!" she says coming back from the master suite.

"Yeah, sorry about that." he mumbles sheepishly.

Smiling, she lets him off the hook "It's okay, but if you hugged me any tighter I was going to go off like a water balloon."

"I like hugging you. Sorry if I get enthusiastic about it." he apologizes with a dreary edge to his voice.

"That's alright. Hey!" she sees a look on his face "What's the matter?" she asks, him not meeting her eyes.

"Nothing. It's alright." he says just standing in the kitchen refilling her wine glass not facing her.

"Aw come on Rick, let's not do the dance aga... Rick?"

"Kate?"

"You didn't think I meant... _Oh my god_. I'm sooo sorry! RICK! You should _not_ have thought that!" she almost explodes apologetically.

Now, in a tiny voice full of embarrassment "I'm sorry. I was... it was... we... you..." letting out a deep sigh he droops his shoulders, hangs his head and confesses "I _couldn't help it_. It started and I couldn't stop it. It snowballed."

"Okay Mister Writer-Man, _that one_ you're going to have to make up to me." she says playfully as she goes back to where he is and wraps her arms around him. "Of course, I guess that means I'll have to make it up to you too. Ah well, such is our burdens to bear." she says getting another bear hug.

After a long while of just holding each other she decides to talk some more. "Rick?"

"Yeah Kate, right here. I'm that big thing you're hugging."

"I know." She says giving him another squeeze.

"There's a couple of other possible paths for me in that future we were discussing." she suggests.

"What are they?" he asks not wanting to talk but to continue to drink in the sensation of holding her.

"Well, Nikki Heat could become a private-eye and maybe even join forces with Derrick Storm." she says sort of whimsically, not admitting to herself that this is the first time she's ever really considered what her future could hold.

"Hmm... That's interesting. I'll have to ponder that. What else do you see?"

"Not so fast writer boy, I want credit for that idea if it happens."

"Ex-CUSE me?" he says sternly. "What the _hell_ did you just say to me?" he snaps at her.

"I... I said I want credit for the idea of Nikki and Derrick working together." she sounds a little scared, like she's stepped over a line she never knew existed. "_Rick_, I'm _kidding!_"

"How dare you call me writer boy, it is writer MAN!" he says with a bright smile picking her up off the floor in a big hug and just holding her like that.

Not to be swayed, she continues the conversation trapped in his grip "There's also things like moving to a different police department. Maybe I could get Chief Brady's job when he retires. Think you could figure a twist for Nikki that puts her in the Hamptons full-time?"

"I like a challenge." he says pulling her tighter. "Maybe that's why I was drawn to you."

"Funny."

"But accurate." he counters as he puts her back onto her feet.

"Okay, so you got me there." she concedes "Getting serious again, I think what I'm saying is that until that meeting, I'd never really bothered to think of my professional life beyond the next arrest. It wasn't until _you_ that I'd even thought about having a tomorrow. I have to admit, the idea of teaching doesn't seem so unappealing. I don't think I'd ever considered such a thing. I know nothing about it or what it would entail much less what he was talking about." she explains, feeling the fatigue catching up to her and letting out a deep yawn.

"Y'know Kate, the teaching he was talking about is not what you're thinking. The idea of a master class like that has a different dynamic. First off, the people who are taking the class aren't green, they're really advanced and will probably learn a lot by watching and doing. As an example, imagine if you tried to teach Johnson subtlety, you'd go crazy, the woman's got the temper of a truck driver and the strength to match."

"And the mouth." she adds.

"And the mouth." he agrees before continuing "You couldn't teach her to sit in the box with a suspect and stare him down no matter how much you tried. However, you get someone like..." he thinks for a moment searching for a good example "like Hastings, who's _trying_ to learn and _wants_ to advance, she's the kind who, just by watching and analyzing someone doing it right, would learn a lot."

"Hmmm... that's interesting." she says absorbing the idea.

"Just consider for a moment some of the things you learned from Jordan Shaw by just working with her and hearing her thought processes." he continues.

"Had to bring _her_ up didn't jya." she smirks at him.

"Hey, remember who it is I'm hugging." he smiles back at her. "I also know someone who's a professional teacher who teaches master classes, maybe you could learn something from her."

"That's a great idea. Who?" her enthusiasm bubbling now.

"That actress Martha Rogers, you've heard of her right? Well I happen to know her landlord, real nice guy, ruggedly handsome too." he says like he's so clever.

"You think I should talk to her?" she asks smiling at his cute statement as she turns her head and rests against his chest.

"About teaching master classes and such? _Absolutely_. About my childhood? _No, not at all_."

After a while of the two standing there in the kitchen wrapped in each other, he suggests "Why don't we take this to the couch. If you can trust yourself with me, I might let you cuddle up under a blanket."

"What an ego! Yes, I can trust myself with you. For the most part." she says with a little wink. "Come on there writer-of-mine." she says pulling him by the hand and heading for the couch. On the way she grabs the remote control for the stereo and starts something mellow playing.

As they cuddle under a blanket and wrap each other up so only their heads are exposed, she confesses. "Rick. I'm glad you were there with me today. I could feel myself going back into my old habits."

"Like what?" he asks genuinely interested.

"For a very long time now, all I've ever had to think about was me." she says as she snuggles tighter "I still forget that there's now an _us_ and that everything I do has to take that into account. And just for the record, I _still_ don't know how to do that." and almost imperceptibly she adds "And it scares me to death."

The two remain silent for a while until she explains more "The first time there was ever an _us_, the other person ignored it. He persued a new job, had multiple interviews, put in the transfer papers, packed up his life and then asked me, as an afterthought, why I wasn't ready to drop everything. Castle, I know our relationship is difficult and I'm not asking for a free pass but I ask that you be a _little_ bit patient and cut me just a little slack if I screw things up because of old habits and not having done this before. And yes, that's a guarantee, I _am_ going to screw things up a _few_ times."

"Only if I get the same consideration. Contrary to popular belief, a lot of this is new to me too." he explains in a low voice. "I'm..." he starts and then sighs.

She waits. He rubs his thumb over the knuckles on her hand that he's holding. He interlocks their fingers and releases them. He's still there, just not ready to talk yet. This is his turn, she's waiting for him.

Quietly he starts in a breathy distant sort of voice "If you want to know what to do on a first date, I can tell you. I've had, quite literally, many hundreds of them. If you want to talk about second dates, I can do that too. I've probably had a hundred or so of those too. This is all assuming we consider a date to be anything more than 'slam; bam; thank you, what's your name again?' and those I don't ever want to think about. I can tell you what is expected after you've been dating a month. However, if you want to have a conversation about six month anniversaries, now we're into some seriously rarefied air. I can only tell you I've screwed up the handful I've had. If you want to have an intelligent conversation beyond _that_, you'd better be prepared to do a lot of the talking because I have _no_ experience and I'm clueless and I have the two failed marriages to prove it."

The two sit, wallowing in each other's warmth for a while before she speaks again. "Rick?"

"Hmmm?"

"I've thought about this a lot and I think you shouldn't hold yourself so responsible for those two divorces." she says quietly. "Of course I don't have any right to judge, especially since I've never been in that situation." She leans her head against his cheek and quietly continues "If anything, I think those two events in your life speak to your innocent optimism of life and hopeful efforts. You didn't fail those marriages as much as I think those marriages failed you. If you want to talk about a failed marriage, go talk to Thompson on the fifth floor. Get him to tell you his story. His first wife left him when she found lipstick stains in his underwear. His second attempt, now _that_ was a spectacular failure. He said that he was having sex with his wife and called out a name that wasn't her's. When they started to fight about it, he called her a _different_ name that still wasn't hers. When the fight went into the street and the cops showed up, _she_ called _him_ a name that wasn't his and tried to apologize for it. The clincher for him was when his wife's girlfriend bailed her out, they cleaned out his house, one of their bank accounts and disappeared. Now _that_ man has failed marriages to be ashamed of."

"Yup, that was what I was missing. Perspective. When you explain it like that, it's clearer but I still feel like I bear some responsibility." After a long pause he asks her "You think about it a lot?" his voice now quiet and scared.

"Yeah I do." she admits easily.

"Why?"

She explains it simply "Because it is part of who you are and because _you_ think about it a lot too. I've heard you reference what you consider to be your great failures more than once. When Lanie and I were talking about you and me, before you showed up with the blond bimbo stewardess because you were pissed at me, it was front and center in the discussion."

"Wow, that seems like it was so long ago." he says almost dreamily. "I told you..." he starts to say.

"_Rick!_" she says almost snapping at him.

"Yeah? I'm right here, no need to yell." he says quietly.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to. I just wanted to say yes it was a long time ago and it's history now and not important." she explains to him.

"You're right of course but there is one important thing I want to tell you. I told you before and I'll repeat it. Nothing happened with her. I didn't even want to try. All I could think of was you." he says giving her a squeeze.

"Thank you for feeling that it's important to say." she says gently.

"You're very welcome." he says hugging her close. Changing the track of the conversation back, he decides to dive right in "So tell me what _you_ thought about that meeting? I mean once you decided to not kill that judge." he asks. "By the way, _impressive_ display of self control you showed."

"Thank you. And you too y'know, that nine-year-old was nowhere to be seen." she smiles at him.

"Hmmm" he says "I think I might have pulled something exerting so much self control, I might need you to rub it and make it better."

"Who was it that said we should keep this chaste?" she reminds him.

"You're right of course. I'm sorry. I was glad to keep it all in check for you. When he ordered me out, I had already started to stand to turn to you and ask you what you wanted but you beat me to the punch."

"It was pretty surreal wasn't it?" she asks sounding far away.

"You just impressed me more, the way you handled yourself there like that." he smiles warmly at her.

She answers with a whack to his chest "You _had_ to tell him about poker with Markaway?! What were you _thinking_?"

"The usual. What an extraordinary woman I get to spend time with. You know, nothing new." he smirks.

"You're not so bad yourself there Mister Writer." says cuddling up closer. Quietly, she says "I can't believe Mike did this and never said anything to me."

"That's because he knows... um... _knew_ you...hmmmm" Castle says having buried his nose in Kate's hair at the back of her neck and getting lost in the smell of cherries. Almost mumbling he tells her "Royce knew..." *snuffle* "...you well enough to know that you'd... have argued... and fought over this to the point of possibly..." _***SNIFFFFFFF***_ "...possibly damaging your own future by being..." _***sniiiiffff***_ "ah... um... by being pig-headed and stubborn. I _cannot_ believe how much better this smells when it is in your hair." he fades off like he's in a trance.

"_Castle!"_ she snaps at him but unable to wipe the smile off of her face. "Cut it _out!_ We need to _talk!_" she says trying to force him to sit up with a little bump from her shoulder.

"Yeah yeah yeah." he says with resignation, "I expect extra sniffing privileges tonight if you're going to ruin my fun now." Sitting up straighter and pouting "Where were we?"

"You were off in space." she smiles.

"Yeah, a space full of cherry scented _awesomeness_. Okay, I'll try to be good. Ahem..." he sits up a little straighter "Back to the subjects at hand. I'm sure you know it but I'll say it anyway. I don't care what you decide... sorry, wrong word, I care, what I mean is that no matter what you choose, you're not going to alienate me. I'll back your decision no matter what and I'll be right here."

Kate smiles a bit and cuddles down in the blanket a little more. Looking lost in space now herself she quietly confesses "This is so scary. If you asked me this morning what my future held, I think I could have told you with a reasonable sense of assurance that I knew but now... Now, there's a whole new world that I didn't know existed in front of me."

Sensing her needs, he says nothing and lets her wallow in the thoughts and feelings. She leans over a bit and he supports more of her weight as she closes her eyes and listens to the music. The two sit silently, unmoving, on the couch. He providing a solid anchor for her. She, seeking purchase in the maelstrom in her head and heart.

Before either of them realizes how much time has passed, they hear a key in the door and Martha comes in chattering away "_Of course I'm sure!_ I wouldn't have said it otherwise." ... "They will be _glad_ to have your insight and experience to learn from." she says into her phone as she closes the door "You can come over here afterwards and have dinner with us. I promise not to cook!" ... "Don't be silly, I don't need to ask, those two will be thrilled." She sees the two on the couch and gives a small wave while she takes off her gloves and coat. "Okay, thank you very much for returning the call and accepting my offer. You just let me know when it fits into your schedule." The two mummified on the couch smile back at her and then turn back to their seating position. Until she finishes her call. "That's great Jim, thank you again!" as she hangs up the phone.

At that Rick and Kate look at each other and mouth the word _"Jim?"_ with raised eyebrows.

"Jim?" Kate asks quietly as Martha walks over and joins them on the other end of the couch.

"Yes dear, that was your father, he's going to join me at my school to help my students get into the mind of a lawyer." Martha says nonchalantly but carefully observing their reactions.

"_My_ dad? At an acting school?" Kate says a bit disbelievingly.

"Mother! What did you hit him with?" Rick says trying to break the tension with humor.

"Whatever do you mean dear?" Martha answers a bit perplexed.

"Mother, Jim Beckett, visiting an acting school, full of empty-headed, flighty types?" Rick states, reminding her of his opinion of actors.

"Oh Richard, _grow up_, it's time to learn from your mistakes and move on. How are you Kate?" she says switching her attention and hopefully the conversation.

"I... ah... sorry, I'm fine thank you. How about you?" Kate asks a bit off balance.

"I'm doing fine thank you. Had a _lovely_ day. You two look like you've run a marathon. Everything alright?" Martha asks concerned.

"Mother, stop trying to avoid the topic, what's going on? Why _and __**how**_ did you rope Jim into visiting your school?" Rick asks more sternly.

"Oh Richard!" the redhead waves dismissivly with a flourish as she stands up and walks to the counter to get herself a glass of wine. "I'm so glad you opened this bottle, I've been dying to try it."

"_Mother!"_ Richard barks.

"Rick!" Kate admonishes him then turns to the actress. "Martha? I'd really like to hear how you got my dad involved." she asks politely still confused by the turn of events.

"Well my dear." the diva says, returning to the couch and scooting over to sit at the other end, glass of wine in hand. Speaking as if she's conspiring with someone she explains "I got asked by a young, up-and-coming, writer to stage a play of his at my acting school to help him work out some of the critical staging and dialog nuances. It's a perfect chance for some of my students to work on a live play that is still in development and see some of the behind-the-scenes work that is done. I'm not too optimistic about the play itself but it's not important, it's the gestalt that matters and contains the value."

"And my dad is going to be involved?" Kate asks giving Rick a nudge with her elbow to encourage him to help her.

"Mother, I don't understand." Rick finally adds.

"Well." Martha begins excitedly "This piece of work is a study of the lives of the two legal adversaries leading up to the trial portrayed in the play, and then the movie, _'_Inherit the Wind'. He's got some silly name for it right now but one of my students, on first read, said that it sounded like a bad cable T.V. show and someone else agreed and referred to it as 'Breaking Bad Wind'. Anyway," the actress continues with her audience transfixed, "I decided that I'd ask a lawyer, who I now realize isn't dull and boring but well reserved and reticent," she says nodding towards Kate "to come and spend some time with the students, letting them ask questions, and see how a _real_ lawyer prepares notes, does research, and the sort of things they worry about before a trial."

Stopping for a sip of wine, she continues "Jim was the _first_ person I thought of when the idea struck me. We always see lawyers as bombastic or sleazy types and while that makes good theater, knowing what depths lie beneath those still waters might make the entire experience better. Then I thought of that lawyer you see on T.V. doing those foolish ads for his services and I thought it would be a nice counter-play to have him come in the next day after Jim to let the students see a different view of the same profession." feeling proud of herself.

Laughing now, Rick is the first to call her on this "I'm sorry Mother, I'm not sure I get it. You're inviting her dad, _Jim Beckett_, to _your acting school,_ to be _quizzed_ and _scrutinized_ by student _actors_?" he presses.

"Exactly Richard." Martha says raising her glass in a mock toast.

"Mother! Have you lost your mind? Don't you remember the last time you two talked shop? Kate and I chose to get shot at by gangsters instead of hanging around the two of you!" Rick exclaims standing up from the couch, animatedly. "Kate, back me up here, does this sound like as bad an idea as _I_ think it does?" he asks putting her squarely on the spot.

"I... I'm not so sure..." Kate thinks for a moment.

"Oh my god, I'm _surrounded_ by them." Rick sighs defeatedly, throwing his hands in the air and heading across the room.

"_Zip-it Castle._" she admonishes him then almost cautiously, Kate digs some more. "Martha, what sort of class is this that you'll be teaching?"

"I don't know what Richard is so scared of, this is not first-year students. This will be a class for the very advanced people who are now sophisticated enough to learn on their own but need only a minor bit of guidance and molding to make them better."

"Castle, sound familiar?" Kate asks over her shoulder to him causing him to stop in his tracks.

"Master Class." he says as the realization hits him.

"Exactly!" Martha says raising her hands to a cacophony of bangles around her wrists.

"Martha, would you mind if I sat in on it and observed? I'd love to see it myself." Kate asks now very interested.

"Of course not dear! You're _always_ welcome." Martha assures enthusiastically. "However, just to satisfy my own curiosity, what prompts this interest?"

"Kate, be careful." Rick advises.

"I know Rick, hang on." she says acknowledging his caution. "Martha," Kate starts solemnly "I want to talk to you about something but it must remain between the three of us, not even Alexis can hear this yet. I am not even sure if I'll be able to talk to my dad about it as much as I might with you." she says taking the redhead's hand in her's. "As it is, I shouldn't be telling anyone."

"Oh Kate, of course! Contrary to popular belief," she says casting a scornful eye at her son "I _can_ keep a secret."

"Okay Martha. I trust you." Kate says preparing herself. "Rick, chime in if you need to." she adds without turning away from his mother. "Ahem..." she clears her throat a bit and gathers her thoughts "I was in..."

"A _conversation_." Rick throws in.

Kate picks up and continues "_Right_, a conversation, that may affect my career path and thereby my entire future. It involves my participation in"

"a branch of law enforcement?" Rick interjects as a question to help her along.

Nodding Kate agrees "Yes, participation in a branch of law enforcement where I may be instructing, what you just called a 'Master Class' type of program."

"Oh my dear!" Martha exclaims smiling. "This sounds wonderful!" she enthuses gleefully.

"It does but you can't imagine how scared and confused it has got me." Kate confides.

"I understand dear. You two have a lot going on and that's enough drama to deal with." she says patting the brunette's hand.

Blushing now Beckett bows her head a little giving the woman a slight grin "Yeah, even before all of that, this would have been a hum-dinger of a decision to deal with."

"The thing is Martha," Kate continues on "I've _never_ in my life imagined the course of my career _or_ life taking such a radical turn. When I hear the term 'teaching' I'm inclined to flash back to my college days and I see something alien. What you're talking about here seems to be something I can almost get my mind around. That's why I wanted to know more. That's also why I'd like to visit and see what the environment is like."

"I won't attend." Rick volunteers. "My presence will contribute nothing other than being a distraction."

"Well, it's about _damn time_!" Kate says to him as she sits back on the couch staring at him as does his mother.

He can feel their eyes boring right through him. "Wh... what do you mean?" Rick asks suddenly feeling like a bug under a microscope.

"It's about time you admit to just being a distraction." Kate says smiling.

_"Argh! I can't believe I walked into that!"_ Castle groans as he walks away from the two towards the kitchen. The two women not noticing him smiling wide.

Kate makes a the sign of 'chocking up a point' for herself when Martha stops her by putting her hand on Beckett's wrist. "No dear," she says shaking her head "you don't get a point for that one. It was _much_ too easy."

"_I CAN HEAR YOU OVER HERE YOU KNOW!_" Castle calls out from the kitchen to deaf ears.

"Please continue Kate." Martha says waving her hand dismissively at him.

"So, this whole idea is only a few hours old and I'm _so_ unsure of what lies ahead of me." the young woman says looking down at her hands in her lap. "I was telling Rick, that up until this afternoon, before this happened, I knew, with a reasonable degree of surety, what my future held. Now, it's _all_ changed. I feel like I've turned a corner in a house of mirrors, everything twisting and changing, it's all familiar but none of it is as I remembered."

"Do you mind if I ask how this alteration came into being?" Martha asks. "It seems that for something like this to affect you so, it must have come out of the proverbial left field."

"It did Martha." Kate sighs. "I think you've heard me mention my training officer Mike Royce before. He..." She trails off trying to put it into words without choking on it.

Rick fills in the story from where he is in the kitchen "He put some things into motion, a while back, as much as a couple of years ago, that have only now come to the surface."

"Thanks Castle. Well put." Kate thanks him across the room. "Mike seems to have thought of this but never mentioned it to me. Today, Rick and I had the first conversation about this."

"Katherine, let me tell you something." the elder woman says fixing her with a maternal gaze and holding her hands tight in hers. "Until _you_ came along and made the suggestion, _my_ life and my future were pretty well figured out too. Then, in passing, you made a comment that switched the purpose of that life and I've never looked back. You gave me more than just a better son..."

"_**Hey!**_**"** Castle calls out from the kitchen with a smile on his face.

"Ignore him dear." she continues without missing a beat. "You gave me a better man for a son and you gave me a purpose that gives more measure to my so-called 'golden years' than I'd have ever imagined. In my opinion, the good-will you've earned with just that should bless you with as much return as I feel I've gotten by my efforts."

The praise humbles the woman to silence. She averts her eyes from Martha's and blushes at the kind words.

Holding Kate's hands tight again, Martha encourages her "Kate, I have, for a long time, been an actress and it felt good and I've done things I can be proud of." Suddenly turning slightly remorseful and looking away "I have _also_ done a few things that I'd just as soon _not_ remember."

"And a few things you _can't_ remember having done." Rick adds teasing.

Wincing and nodding in agreement, Martha returns to a serious posture and continues "All those things add up to a fulfilling career and a life to be satisfied with. However, in the past couple of years, I've seen the things I've done in a different light, in no small part thanks to you,"

"Me?" Kate asks surprised.

"Yes _you_ my dear," she answers earnestly before continuing "and I've now seen the work and efforts I went through in my earlier life as a sort of training for me to impart that wisdom to others and to provide a place and a means for others to do the same and to build upon."

Sitting back and taking a sip of her wine, the redhead continues "I once told you I was nominated for a Tony award. Let me tell you my dear, that felt _good_ and it validated a lot of hard work and a lot of hardships for me and my family. I will always treasure that recognition but it almost pales in comparison to a letter I got only a few months ago. I have it hanging in my office at the school. It's from a student of mine. He was one of my first students. He studied a lot and was doing well when he left to go to California for personal reasons. The letter he sent me was a thank-you note. He took his acting skills, coupled them with his addiction to adrenalin and became a stuntman. His note to me said that he had just been blown up for the first time and he owes it all to me." Martha says with tears running down her face as Kate hands her a tissue.

"That's beautiful Martha." Kate whispers.

"Thank you dear." Martha says dabbing at the tears. "The point I'm trying to make is that while my Tony nomination is something for me to be proud of, I don't have it hanging on the wall at my school. His letter means as much if not more. His letter tells me that my work has a tangible legacy and that the fear, dread and uncertainty that the prospect of starting an acting school evoked was worth braving. Sure, we all live on in our children.."

"And grandchild" Kate interjects.

"Yes," Martha agrees smiling "and our grandchildren, both of whom I _am_ proud of, and I don't regret, resent or begrudge either of them one bit but the feeling of knowing that _I_ did _something_ that helped others grow and reach for and achieve greater goals and that it will outlive me is _almost_ as good as having had a child grow up, become successful, and well liked."

Sitting back down on the couch behind Kate, Rick chimes in with "Well, I've done two out of three, that's not too bad." earning a laugh from both women.

"I think I see what you mean Martha." Kate says still deep in thought. "How did you find the courage to open your school to begin with?"

"Kate my darling girl, I didn't _find_ the courage, it was _loaned_ to me by others. My dear sweet Chet. He felt enough for me to provide what turned out to be the basis for this dream. He lent me his courage by having been so much more than I could imagine I deserved. Richard lent me... not just courage but his wisdom and forbearance, his daughter and her love and faith to pursue it with the knowledge that flourish or fail, I wasn't without love, family or friends and that the _only_ way I could disappoint them was to _not_ try to reach for my own dreams."

Martha continues right on without skipping a beat "Then there's my students. They give me courage every day. I'm awed at how much courage some of them show. One of my students is in his fifties. He decided that he'd had enough of being a cog in the wheels of the company he worked for and simply quit to pursue acting. He said it's always been his dream and he decided that now was when it was going to happen. His wife and he are living frugal lives and he's working hard to try and make something of himself. Now that's courage. Then there's you." as Martha says it, she can see the impact in the woman's features.

"Me?" Kate asks incredulously.

"Yes, you my dear! You lent me courage and confidence to see through the mists of ambiguity and confusion to recognize the path to a purpose I'd _never_ thought of, much less imagined."

Mightily Kate struggles to maintain a stable mental footing after the impact of such a statement. Martha watches her and carefully reads her, waiting for the time to continue. Even Castle knows Kate's been thrown for a loop. "Martha... I..." Kate starts. She's not even sure of what she wants to say much less _how_ to say it.

"There there now dear." Martha coos patting Kate's hand. "You don't need to say anything." Then standing and producing a small yawn behind her hand she announces "My goodness, where has the time gone?" looking at her watch "I really must get my beauty sleep. Kate, sleep on it all. You've obviously been overwhelmed by all your adventures today. A good night's sleep will do you a world of good." She turns to her son "Richard. Why don't you put this poor woman to bed for the night. She's exhausted. Not everyone enjoys being as sleep deprived as you do. Meanwhile, I'm going to practice what I preach." she says picking up her empty wine glass and turning towards the kitchen. "Ta-ta daalings, have a good night's sleep. I'll see you in the morning." she announces.

Meanwhile, Kate still sits on the couch, eyes wide in shock, unfocused and fixed on nothing while Martha has departed. She doesn't even hear Castle talk to her. Finally he puts his hand on her shoulder "Kate? Are you alright?" he asks concerned.

Slowly Kate turns to him, still wide-eyed and gently asks "Me?"

Smiling, he sits down next to her and puts an arm around her shoulder. "Yes dear. You. I've never said anything about it but yes you did, you gave her a great gift in helping her figure out what to do with that money from Chet."

"But... all... I did was..." she stutters, still a bit in shock.

"Yes I know. You're going to say that all you did was offer her a simple statement to make her feel better. The truth is, you provided the right information at the right time in the right way and she's never been the same. If you ever repeat what I'm about to tell you, I'll _never_ let you off the hook again, on _anything._" he says smilling and moving in and lowering his voice "She says you've given her a better son. The truth is, you've also given me a better mother and my daughter a better grandmother. She has a singular sense of purpose that I don't think I've ever seen her have in _many_ years. I've seen her driven for some things, some roles, some charities, some self indulgent things too but the new Martha Rogers is an amazing thing to experience. Even Alexis has pointed out that she seems to have a renewed purpose in life and we both agreed its because of your presence in our family." he finishes and sits motionless while she reels from yet another mental and emotional blow.

Very quietly and almost under her breath she sighs exclaiming "Oh my god." as she leans into him and closes her eyes.

The two sit there for a while, for once the nine-year-old Ricky is absent and the doting father, concerned friend, understanding partner and patient lover has taken his place and he just holds her tight and lets her recover.

He finally feels the stress in her shoulders starting to ease, he knows the storm is waning and exhaustion is tightening its grip on her. "Come on Kate, let me put you to bed." he says as he stands and quickly and easily scoops her off of the couch with only a little giggle from her as she puts her arms around his neck. She's so spent she doesn't even bother arguing with him this time. "You've had a busy day my dear. I want you to get some rest. Doctor Castle's orders are complete bedrest and sleep for the next six to eight hours minimum." he says as he sits her down on the side of the bed. "No arguments of any kind will be allowed. You are staying here tonight and then we'll deal with things tomorrow with a fresh perspective."

"Okay. You win." she says getting ready for bed.

"Huh? You didn't even argue with me? You _must_ be spent." he cracks with a smile.

"You'll pay in the morning, right now, I just want the tornado to pass." she says winking at him.

"You get into bed and I'll be in after a little while. I've got some notes I need to work on and I'd rather get them taken care of tonight." he explains as he leaves the bedroom letting her have the space and the quiet to herself as she readies for bed.

Castle closes the door behind him and returns to his office for his own work. As he types up some of his thoughts a scheme occurs to him, he pulls out his phone and sends a text to Esposito asking if it would be a burden if he convinced Beckett to play hookey tomorrow. Almost as soon as it is sent the answer appears "No."

Smiling now he contemplates a little about how to give Kate some quiet time to think when his phone goes off again. Another note from Esposito, longer this time _"no prob bro. noton call just case wrk to clean, we can hndle work. she ok?"_

He smiles knowing how much she means to her team and how much they all care for each other, he replies "_She's great. she has some stiff to powder from mike royce. I want her stay home and chill. thanks for evenheating-RC"_ as he hits SEND he realizes how much he hates the autocorrect on his phone. He punctuates the thought by holding it right up to his face and says to it "I said thanks for _everything_ you annoying appendage!" before he retypes the message correctly to Espo.

He finishes his notes a little while later and goes around the house closing up for the night, checking the door, putting their glasses in the washer, turning off the lights and finally heading into the bedroom. He walks quietly to not wake her if she's sleeping, he can't tell right now if she is or not so he silently slips into the bathroom for his preparations when he hears her stir. "I'm not asleep yet." she says.

"Shhh go to sleep. Stop disobeying doctor's orders." he whispers to her. "I'll set the alarm for five so you can get up at your normal time." he says as he closes the door to the bathroom.

A little while later he comes out in his shorts and teeshirt to join her. He quietly and gently slips into the bed next to her and she stirs. "Rick, thank you for everything." she mumbles into the pillow as he settles in.

"You're very welcome my dear." he whispers into her hair over her shoulder causing her to spoon backwards into him seeking comfort in his presense. Snuggle Bunny Kate Beckett is one of his favorite things. He smiles at her actions and wraps his arms around her to hold her tight, to provide that anchor she needs so desparately. He kisses her ear and whispers "Good night Kate. I love you."

Half gone already, she mumbles "I love you" back to him. He can tell she's already mostly asleep, the exhaustion and emotions finally vaporizing behind the vail of darkness. He smiles and they drift off together.


	12. The morning after

"Oh for god's sake, do us all a favor and _shoot_ that damn thing." he mumbles as he pulls her tighter and buries his face into her hair at the back of her neck.

"You're the one who set the alarm, don't get testy with me." she says with a brightness to her voice as she pries herself out of his grip and reaches for the phone to shut off the alarm.

"You stay here sleeping beauty, I need to workout before I go in." she whispers as she gets out of the bed.

"No work." he mumbles as he pulls her pillow to his face seeking comfort in her scent. "Espo says you can relax."

"Esposito? You talked to him?" she challenges a little less quietly.

"Yeah, last night, asked if you can go in late or take... day off, he says no prob..." he fades off punctuated by a half snore, half snort.

She smiles at him. She should be mad at him for interfering like this but she knows he did it for the right reasons. Not that she won't make him repay her for it though.

She goes about her early morning ritual and changes into her yoga clothes to work out the stress and knots in her body and mind. On her way by the kitchen, she turns on the coffee machine so it is ready when she comes back down from working out.

As she quietly climbs up the stairs to the roof to do her exercises she thinks of all the things that have gone on and all the crazy things that have happened in the past twenty four hours. It is now that she has the real work to do. Sort through all the pluses and minuses of each choice and what each of those choices will do to those others around her.

Opening the door to the roof she's met with the crisp cool, moist air of the morning, still untouched by the city, the morning light spilling over the horizon bright and clean. The storms of yesterday that pelted the city have left, much as the storms in her life have left leaving only the aftermath to clean up.

* * *

A while later, Castle stirs awake, slightly embarrassed at having noticed that he was right in the midst of passionately kissing the love of his life only to discover it is just her pillow he was clutching tight and french kissing. He wakes more, smacking his lips trying to decide why it feels like someone painted his tongue. "I need coffee to erase this feeling." he thinks. He sits up and sees her yoga mat missing and remembers that she's working out. He knows that it is time to get up. He crawls out of bed heading for the coffee machine and then into the bathroom to start his day.

* * *

As she descends the stairs after a full workout, she feels better, the stresses and kinks in her body and soul exorcised but the road to her future still shrouded in a haze of uncertainty. She knows what she has to do. It's the same thing she does at work when they are unsure of a motive, reevaluate all aspects of each piece of evidence and fact to build a solid picture of the problem. She can do this. It scares her but she likes it anyway. Maybe, unlike all the times in the past, she has company on this ride. Someone who cares about her and wants the best for her no matter what it takes. When she gets to the bottom of the stairs, she can hear Castle in his office typing away madly at his laptop, purging his heroes and villains. She grabs a cup of coffee before heading for the master suite, then she realizes she's smiling wide. Happy and contented despite the uncertainty in her future. "Maybe its like Martha said," she thinks to herself "I can only fail if I don't try."

* * *

A little while later she saunters into his office, "So _Mister_ Castle, did you have a plan in mind when you ask my co-workers for my day off?" she asks with a defiant and saucy edge in her voice as she puts a fresh cup of coffee on his desk in front of him. Dressed in casual clothes and her flat shoes she plops herself down on the couch with her damp hair falling around her shoulders.

"Ah there you are! You're looking refreshed." he smiles "I had nothing planned for you. I assumed that you'd welcome the chance to decompress and review the facts of the case." he says pushing his laptop onto his desk, putting his feet down and picking up his coffee cup. "I suspected you'd have done it last night but I think you got overcome by events and needed your rest."

"Very considerate of you. Thank you. Yes, I think I'd like to try and get a grip on all that has gone on." she says smiling.

"That's good because you're going to have some alone time to do it. I just got an email from my _other_ favorite girl asking me to meet her downtown this morning for a coffee while she does some, as she put it, emergency shopping for a new scarf." he says with a bright and happy smile. This is the Richard Castle very few people ever get to see, the doting father, the strong, proud, fearless man who is happily wrapped around his little girl's finger. She loves seeing him like this.

"Well, if you're spending the day with..." she begins to offer.

"Nope, sorry, just a couple of hours, that's all the time you get without me." he interrupts grinning and shooting a small elastic band at her from his desk.

"You're a _brat_." she exclaims as she leans to one side to avoid the projectile. "Just for that I might not let you win the next game of laser tag." she teases knowing that he's good enough to actually win against her at times because she's usually lost in the warm embrace of the moment and doesn't care who wins, it's the playing that matters.

"Yeah yeah yeah, you keep telling yourself that Miss Beckett, we'll see what's what when we play next. Just you wait."

"Really Castle? That's the best you can come up with? Drink your coffee." she smiles at him.

"Do you want any breakfast?" he offers.

"I was thinking of just that. How about you?" she asks getting up from the couch.

He comes around the desk to join her and as they pass through the doorway together, Castle pinches her butt earning a surprised squeak and girlish giggle from her and a half-hearted swing at him that misses as he hurries to the kitchen ahead of her. "Ha ha. I got in here first, _I_ get to prepare breakfast for _you_." he taunts childishly doing a little dance.

"Wow, so grown-up Castle." she says taking a seat at the bar.

"You're just jealous because I beat you to it. Now, what would you like?" he asks "First! Let's get you some orange juice, you need your **vit**-a-mins." he announces in a goofy voice as he spins on his heel and heads for the 'fridge.

"I know I'm going to be mocked for being boring but I'd like a small bowl of cold cereal this morning." she says taking the glass of juice from his hand.

"Mocked? _Who_ would do such a thing to _you_? _Tell me who dares insult my muse and I'll give them what-for!_" He announces somewhat loudly with his fists on his hips as if notifying a room full of suitors of his territory. "_No one_ gets to mock _my_ boring and unimaginative detective slash muse!" he laughs at her as he gets bowls from the shelf for the two of them.

"_Excuse me?_ Unimaginative? _Seriously?_" she challenges with a sharp edge. "You're calling _me_ unimaginative? Exactly _how many_ muscles did you stretch and hurt the other night in the shower?" she demands with a steady knowing stare.

He stares back at her glassy eyed and is momentarily lost in the memory of their escapades in the shower together. "Okay. You win." he says with a wide and happy grin on his face as he gets her the milk from the refrigerator and sits down next to her to pour his own breakfast.

"That's better. You do that again and I may not let you wash my hair the way you like to." she says sternly but fighting to control a lust filled grin.

Haughtily he decides two can play that game. "Well my dear, if you're not going to allow that, I may not allow you to return the favor and that might just make that soft waterproof kneeling pad we purchased superfluous."

"Hmmm... Mant havve tat." she mumbles past a mouthful of cereal with a bright sparkle in her eyes only to be met by his wide loving grin at her and a gentle shoulder bump.

"Before we get sidetracked." he starts to say.

"What's this _we_ crap Kemosabe?" she retorts quickly. "I seem to remember..."

"_ALL RIGHT!"_ he declares admitting defeat before she can say anything more. "Before _I_ get sidetracked... Is that better?"

"Yes it is. Now, you were saying?" she smiles.

"Don't know, I got sidetracked." he says only half-seriously. "Oh yeah, do you need me to pick anything up for you while I'm out?"

"Nothing that comes to mind at the moment. As long as we have enough shampoo we should be fine." she answers not even aware of how at home she is here in his loft.

"Trust me my dear muse, partner and inspiration, I won't _ever_ let that happen." he says easily as he cleans up after their breakfast.

She sits, watching him, smiling slightly, just "this" close to wanting to pinch herself to make sure her life is all still real.

"What?" he stops in mid motion, half bent over putting dishes into the dishwasher. "What'd I do? Do I have something on my face? _What?_" he asks, panic rising slightly. He checks to make sure his shirt is buttoned evenly and looks at his socks. He turns away from her and checks his fly. He turns back to her and says "I know what you're doing. Don't think you can mess with my head like that. I'm wise to you woman."

"Really?" she asks smirking, taking a draw on her coffee.

"Yes really. I know what you're up to." he says confidently. After a short pause, his whole body language droops. "Please tell me what I did!" he begs her.

Smiling, she lets him off the hook "Aw come on Castle. I was just basking in the moment. You didn't do anything bad."

"Whew!"

"This time."

"Rats! Got me again."

"It's okay Rick. I was just thinking about everything. I still find moments when I find it hard to look at my life and not be completely amazed." She smiles at him. "Most of which I attribute to you."

"Thank you my dear. It has been a pleasure and an honor to provide you with some measure of happiness." he says planting his chin on his upturned hands on his elbows on the bar so his face is right in front of hers. Puckering up for a kiss and looking like a strange fish he continues to talk "Just so we're clear. I'm not done with you yet. I still have other plans for you."

Laughing at his antics she gives in and gives him the peck he's waiting for. "You do huh? Like what Mister Castle?" she asks, her heart beating faster with every passing moment.

"Never! You can torture me all you want" then in a tiny high-pitched voice he adds "please please please" then returning to his normal voice "and I'll never tell. I won't disclose my secret plans! That would give away too much of the story! You my dear will have to wait and savor the unfolding of the story and the adventure."

"RRRriiiight... Lemme guess. You've not planned that far out yet?" she says playing along and smiling at his childishness.

"Of course I have! I have a _secret_ plan! I've planned everything out in great detail! It is all going exactly as I foresaw it." he boasts again.

She says nothing but stares at him while she takes another sip of her coffee.

Hanging his head in shame he tells her "Okay, you got me. I have no plans." then in his small high voice again "Does that mean you won't torture me?" he asks pouting.

Kate roars with laughter at his antics, dropping off the stool and walking over to him to share a languid kiss. "We may have to discuss this over dessert tonight." she says as they smooch, teasing each others lips and tongue.

"Dessert?" he shrugs his shoulders "Okay, if you say so."

"Only if you have the whipped cream to go with the strawberries, otherwise dessert is off." she smiles, her eyes ablaze with lusty playfulness while they're wrapped in each others arms.

"_Oh!_ You mean _**dessert**_, not just dessert! I gotcha!" he smiles pleased with himself.

"Took you long enough there writer man. Hey, speaking of writing, it sounded like you were actually working before I interrupted you. Whatcha workin' on?" she asks batting her eyes at him.

"Sorry lady. I've been informed that there's a strict no-spoilers rule around here so you'll have to wait like almost everyone else." he says sternly.

"Almost?" she asks playing wounded.

"Yes my lovely, almost. You and the one other special woman in my life get to see it all before the rest of the world, including the insiders on my website but only after it is all ready for press."

She thinks to herself how amazing it is that even a simple statement like that makes him ooze love and passion. "Okay writer-man but you'd better make sure or else."

"Or else what?" he asks, narrowing his eyes in a challenge.

"I... um..." she stops and looks off to one side a little pensive.

"Looks like I'm _not_ the only one who doesn't think it all through." he smirks only to get a playful slap on the arm from her.

"Enough of your childish antics. Go back to work. I need to call in and check with the boys." she smiles giving him another kiss before trying to move away only to be stopped by his arms still locked around her waist. "Castle. If we keep doing this neither one of us is going to get anything useful done today." she pauses then says "Well, anything _else_ useful."

He sighs heavily and drops his arms to his side. He starts to walk drone-like towards his office saying in a monotone "Work work work... Back to the ol'e salt-mine. Such is my lot in life. _Sigh_."

She grabs the slightly dampened sponge from the counter, throws it at him, beaning him with it and then runs around the couch to get away from him when he comes after her. He chases her this way and that around the couch finally throwing himself over the couch and landing on the floor with an "_Ooooof!"_ he stops moving.

"Castle! Are you alright! Castle, say something!" she says raising her voice in panic and she charges over to him, just as she reaches him he knocks her down onto the couch and pins her arms down so they're nose to nose.

"_GOTCHA!_ See? I _do_ plan _some things_ that work out." he smirks in her face as they smooch.

"Oh, I see. So you planned this eh? Well, nice job. This time it worked."

"Yup, I've got you right where I want you." then looking at the position they're in "Or maybe you've got me right where you want. Either way, it worked. Do you need a fresh cup of motivation before I return to my work?" he asks.

"Nope, thanks. I've still got some left there before I refuel." she says.

"Okay then. Let me go be brilliant whilst you be responsible."

"Sounds like a good idea." she says after he helps her up and she goes to pick up the sponge only to have him swat her backside when she bends for it and then runs into his office giggling.

She smiles at the warmth she feels. Heading for the kitchen she washes out the sponge and puts it away, dries her hands and pulls out her phone. A fluid, well-practiced motion starts a call to her team. "Hey Ryan." ... "No, nothing's wrong, just had some personal stuff to sort out." ... "Yeah, it's about that meeting but that's really all I can say." ... "Like I said, nothing bad. Hey, how's Jenny doing?" ... "Good! I'm glad. What did the doctor think?" ... "That's great. Anything exciting going on there today?" ... "Johnson? No, I haven't heard." ... "_Really?_ How hard did the guy hit her?" ... "_OUCH!_ Well, it's his own damn fault. Are they going to arraign him in the hospital bed or will they wait for his jaw to mend?" ... "Good. good. Tell her I said congratulations on closing that one, it sounded like it was tough." ... "No, at Castle's." ... "I haven't called her yet, I figured I'd call her after I check my email." ... "Okay yeah." ... "Seriously? Since when did Karpowski ask to get out of being on call?" ... "Yeah, it sounds it to me too. Put twenty in for me. Any idea how long she's been seeing him?" ... "Wow! Okay, make that thirty then on a month." ... "If Gates is okay with the switch, I'm okay with it." ... "Right, give me a call if you guys need anything." ... "'kay. Bye." she finishes the call as she picks up the iPad and sits on the couch facing the windows.

From his office Castle calls out "Everything alright?"

"Yeah, everything's fine. You know that case Johnson's been working on?"

"Umm... The guy with the boats smuggling stuff that sank a boat with people on it?" he asks still typing away.

Smiling she tells him "Yup, that's the one. She caught him with another boat loaded with drugs and more women in the hold."

"_All right!_" he crows "That's fantastic."

"There's a touch of poetic justice too. He tried to fight it out with Johnson. Hit her with a two by four." she explains.

"What an idiot. Is she going to be okay?" he asks concerned.

"Oh yeah, she's fine. She took the time to explain the mistake to him."

"Ouch! He asked for it. How bad are his injuries." Castle laughs, pausing in his writing for the answer.

"Looks like he got a broken arm, and a couple of ribs. Oh yea, and she broke his jaw. In his haste to escape the she-gorilla he pissed off, it seems he fell down into the hold of the boat, breaking both of his legs and an ankle, landed right in the middle of where the women he was smuggling in were." she explains as if it's just another day in the office.

"Well, he deserves what he got." he says nodding at the justice of it.

"It seems that the women didn't understand the word 'Stop' in English and it took a while for Johnson and the others to get down to where he was to rescue him. His days of siring children have come to an abrupt and tragic end. The doctors aren't sure if he'll ever be able to go to the bathroom standing up again either." she laughs.

"Talk about bad karma. Wow. What did Johnson say?" he replies.

"Dunno. Just got the news from Ryan. I figure we'll hear about it tomorrow. Oh hey, seems like Karpowski's got another guy. He sounds like a nice one too. I put thirty on her mother scaring the guy away before the month is up."

"Thirty huh? What's he do?"

"It sounded like he's a computer geek but I don't know. Ryan said he's treating her like a princess so I'd guess he's got a good job and a nice personality."

"Shoulda put fifty on it." he tosses out.

"We'll see when we talk to her. She's switching the on-call with us because she's going to show or something."

"Really? A show? Karpowski? Probably should've made it a hundred."

"Rick?"

"Yes dear?" he answers without looking up from his typing.

"Should we be betting on _other_ people's lives when we don't like them having pools on us?"

"I don't know but Karpowski is a different case. Didn't you hear Lanie? She said that Karpowski's going to be able to send her kid to college on the winnings on us alone. I don't mind if we profit a bit from her."

"Yeah, well... maybe." she says halfhearted. "Hey, what time are you leaving?"

"I'm just finishing up these notes now. Why? You trying to get rid of me?" he teases.

"Castle, I gave up on that a long time ago." she answers as she gets up to get a fresh cup of coffee "That damn Roy wouldn't listen to me no matter how much I complained." she says hiding her smile from him.

"I always did think he was a smart man." he says coming out of his office.

"Yeah. I guess he was." she concedes as she pours her coffee.

"Okay then. I think my mother will be leaving in a little bit so other than that the place is yours for a couple of hours. No dancing around naked. No drunken karaoke performances." he says with a lighthearted twinkle.

"No?" she semi-sings and pouts demurely pushing her bottom lip out and batting her eyelashes at him.

He stares at that lip, seeming to be swollen and needing his attention until she snaps "Earth to Castle!" and laughs at how easily distracted he is.

Shaking his head to refocus his thoughts on anything but the images in his mind he fights for control of his imagination. "We can discuss those things later, I have to go spend time with my daughter and I can't have those thoughts floating around in my head."

"Okay, you go help her make the hard decisions and I'll stay here and ponder my future." she says carrying her cup of coffee towards his office.

"Kate?" he calls after her quietly.

"Yes?" She responds lightly turning to face him a few paces away. She is a little surprised at the serious look on his face.

"_Our_ future?" he asks gently but emphasizing the possessive.

"I'm sorry Rick, yes. _Our_ future." she agrees, more than a little embarrassed at her oversight. She pauses, averts her eyes to her coffee and says "That's the sort of thing I was talking about last night Rick. Old habits. I _am_ sorry." As she finishes she looks back at his face to see how much she hurt him only to see him smile back at her.

"I understand. It's okay." he assures her with a smile. "Get in there and start digging for answers." he says with a wave and reassuring brightness in his attitude.

"See ya when you get back then." she answers back. She takes a moment and looks around the room and the situation they're in and realizes how domestic it all feels.

"What?" he asks when he sees the look on her face.

"Um... Nothing. It's just... Nothing." she smiles back at him.

"Okay, I'm off. Call if you need me." he says putting on his jacket as he heads for the door.

"Will do." she answers going into his office wearing a smile. She hears the front door click shut and she's suddenly hit with the wonderful comfort she feels here. It feels so... _home_. It seems so natural. She looks around his office and thinks how this _isn't_ the first time she's been here alone and there's _nothing different_ about this time but it all looks and feels different somehow, like seeing a painting at the museum under a different light. Things feel different. She smiles to herself and, pulling out her phone, with another well practiced movement, she calls her best friend.

"Lanie." ... "Stop complaining, I'm calling you now aren't I?" ... "Don't give me that. Javi was right there when he got Castle's message." ... "How do you think I know?" ... "Well yeah! Duh!" ... "If you'll stop giving me grief for your self-imposed martyrdom, I'll tell you." she says parking herself on the couch in the office. "Same to you lady." she says laughing "I can't tell you too much, especially over the phone." ... "No, I don't think Castle's right and the CIA listens to all of our phone calls." she answers back with a snotty attitude and a laugh. "Anyway, I had a meeting yesterday, yes, that one. See, I knew Javi was talking to you." ... "Yeah, we both went." ... "Lanie, he couldn't have written a weirder story than what happened. Even he admits it. Remember I told you about the letters in Royce's stuff?"

Smiling at her friend's antics she puts her feet up on the arm of the couch "Exactly, yeah. One of them landed and it seems to have been about me." ... "No, can't tell you that. Not yet at least." ... "You wouldn't believe who I _am_ allowed to talk to about it." ... "Nope. I'm not even going to let you keep guessing, I'll tell you. Captain Gates." ... "No! I'm not kidding! Freaked me out, that's for sure. Quite frankly even Rick was surprised. By the end of yesterday I was so spent. Rick carried me from the couch to the bed." ... "I know _right?_ My life has been put into a spin." ... "No, not in a bad way. As a matter of fact, possibly so good none of us will believe it. When the... um... person we were talking to said why we were there, Castle got caught by surprise and coughed. When pressed, he admitted being surprised, partially because he hadn't thought of it himself."

She leans back and grabs her coffee from the table and takes a draw from it. "I'm sorry but I'm going to dance around those questions for a lot of reasons but right now, this is all still confidential." ... "No as in, the person who said it was confidential can make my life pretty miserable." ... "Okay, so here's the question, you're a well educated woman with a lot of experience, how do you think I'd do teaching in... er... um... in a _law enforcement_ environment?" ... "Lanie?" ... "Lanie? You there?" ... "Oh. I thought I lost you." ... "That's _exactly_ what I said. So what do you think?" ... "That's why I'm asking you! I haven't a clue yet. This whole thing is only a few hours old." ... "You really think that?" ... "Wow thanks." ... "I was telling Rick that until he showed up... yeah, that's what I said. Even with Will, the idea of a long-term future wasn't an issue." ... "So many things are spinning, I don't know what to think yet."

"No, he went out with Alexis." Her eyes close and her voice softens as she switches from Detective Beckett to just Kate, dad's girlfriend. "Oh she's doing well, we're getting along better and better. I think she's mostly forgiven me for my screw-ups and I think she's actually starting to believe us when we talk about how serious we are." ... "I don't think so. Thank you anyway. I suspect that she'll talk to me when she's good and ready and feels comfortable doing it but I'll keep your offer in mind. I think I just have to be there for her when she needs it and let her decide for herself." ... "To tell you the truth, that little girl scares me worse than the killers I hunt. Oh, you knew that huh? Well, aren't you a smarty pants." she laughs into the phone.

"No, I'm not sure what he thinks yet. We talked yesterday about a lot of stuff and... **No!** We didn't talk about that!... _**Anyway**_ we talked about a lot of stuff and that's when we decided to sleep on it. Since he's gone out with Alexis I'm just getting to sit down and start reviewing the situation. Huh? Oh okay, I understand. Well, call me later if you want, I don't expect to be going anywhere for a bit. Right. 'bye." as she hangs up the phone she leans back with her arm over her eyes, resting her phone on her stomach.

She reaches out, finds the remote for the stereo and puts on some music, nothing cerebral right now, she needs to think about this, not other things, maybe some good blues or mellow jazz.


	13. Tales of a Princess and a Prince

_**Author's Note:**_  
I blame the bulk of this chapter on AshLiz who, through the careless, nay, make that, _irresponsible_ dropping of an offhand remark sparked an idea that grew out of control and manifested itself here. I'd like to be mad but I can only thank her for the great idea. ;)

(But _oh,_ has this been a difficult chapter to write! I can't believe how hard it can be.)

She was _so_ right, more stories about Kate & Royce needed to be created. I hope I did a passing job of bringing one of them to life. It also brought out a Kate/Martha moment I didn't know about. (Hey, I'm as surprised about what appears on the page in front of me as some of you are.) :)

In an uncharacteristic move, I'm going to ask directly, please leave me a review/comment on this story. I'd really like to hear what people think about it and how it is going.  
Thank you for reading my story, I hope you enjoy it.

* * *

She sits up to put her coffee down and notices the briefcase on the floor. Her emotions well up again. "Mike you _stubborn_ ass." she says under her breath to him. She slides down onto the floor with her legs stretched out and leans back against the couch, lays the case down next to her and flips open the latch. She hesitates for a heartbeat then opens it. Memories of her friend, mentor and occasionally her _tormentor_ swirl around her.

She pulls out the legal pad full of notes, scribbles and doodles. As she leafs through the pages she recognizes some of Mike's notations. Here's a page full of little things. He was obviously spending a lot of time waiting for this runner. According to the doodles he nicknamed the guy Magoo because he was blind as a bat. "Nice Mike, very P.C. of you." she mumbles to herself. "Ugh! Mike you pervert." she says smiling as she finds the word "window" written where the 'd' and the 'o' are made to look like boobs. Knowing Mike, that's the window he watched while he was waiting for his runner to show up. "Jeez Mike, I would have thought you'd have evolved at least a little bit over the years." she laughs.

As she turns the pages, she can begin to read his thoughts again. This runner is smart. This other runner could get lost on a playground swing. Here's a note that says the runner is out with a partner and they're both running. Big payday.

This page must have been when he was in court. It's full of bizarre little doodles. He never could handle having to sit for a long time like that. She sees a note at the very top of the page, almost hidden by the previous page, '_Call KB b4 17th'_ making her sob a bit. "Mike..." she says under her breath, trailing off, knowing it won't do any good.

She puts down the pad and taking the datebook out, she starts to flip through it, page by page, slowly stepping into his shoes for the last year of his life. She recognizes some of his notations, the one on January 9th of just a simple cross, a simple blessing for her mother.

He seems to have always remembered that event. He might have been the only other person who helped her bear the weight of that day until she met Castle. As a haunting saxophone fills the space around her she closes her eyes and thinks back to the days when Mike was the only person she could trust. How he always pushed her but she trusted him with her safety. She pulls her knees up and rests her chin on them as she continues to slowly flip the pages in his datebook. The cross in March for his favorite Uncle. A birthday cake doodle for his cousin's birthday. A stick figure snoring on a pillow, his notation for a stake-out.

"Oh! Kaate!" a voice surprises her making her jump "I heard the noise but I didn't know anyone was here." Martha says surprised from the doorway.

"Martha! I'm sorry. Yes, Rick left to provide some moral support to Alexis." She says trying to regain her composure.

"Is she all right?" the grandmother asks concerned.

"Yes but it seems that she's in need of a shoulder to lean on while she does some, as she put it, emergency shopping for a new scarf. Rick didn't even argue with her, just happy to run to her as always." Kate says smiling.

The anxiety lifted she proudly tells Kate "The day that girl was born and smiled at him, he was a goner."

"It shows Martha, in every fiber of his being." Kate agrees.

"So my dear, what's with the music?" Martha asks.

"Oh sorry." Kate says reaching for the remote and turning it down. "I was just thinking about everything that's been going on and started to think about my old friend Mike Royce. The music helps me."

"Maybe it is a generational thing but I _never_ understood music like that. It sounds so sad. There are times that it reminds me of a wailer at a wake." The redhead says sitting down on the couch next to where Kate is on the floor.

"That's just it Martha, it is."

"Really?"

Kate lifts herself back up onto the couch to sit and talk to the woman. "Do you know how when you've overexerted muscles like in your arms or your legs and you get someone who really knows what they're doing to rub those muscles? It hurts right? This is just like that. It _is_ sad and it does make you want to wallow some in the ache but just like getting that sore muscle worked properly, it's a hurt that feels good and relieves that bad hurt."

"I know the sort of muscle ache you speak of. At my age, they're becoming all too frequent." Martha confides. "I never heard of music doing that. Maybe I should have paid more attention. So my dear, what is it that has you wallowing this morning?"

"Rick just left and this is my first chance to scatter the pieces of this situation around and start to try and sort them out. To see what choices I have and what effect they will have. That was when I started to think about Mike. I was telling Rick that of all the people I've lost in my life he's probably the only other person, beside my mom, whom I really feel bad about losing because of things unsaid."

"That's alright dear. The thing to do is use that as a _lesson_ moving forward. Don't wait, _act_ on your thoughts and feelings. Of course, look who I'm talking to." she says throwing her hands up "The two of you were the poster children for _things unsaid_ and avoiding the obvious." the actress laughs.

"I guess we deserved that." Kate smirks. "Mike seems to have done that to me a lot." she states mostly to herself.

"What's that dear?" she asks.

"Sorry. Didn't mean to be cryptic." she apologizes "Mike did a lot of things to me that seemed almost cruel at the time but later on I found out it was an opportunity to learn. I was telling Rick about it last night. Mike used to play tricks on me and it turns out they had meaning and benefits that I'd have never imagined. Like this one time," Kate starts and closes her eyes to relive the moment "Mike had developed a habit of calling me either princess or bitch."

"That's not very nice." Martha chides.

"I agree and it hurt for a while and he kept doing it and it kept hurting until I got angry and started to thicken my skin to it. When I started to call him pin-head or bone-head as well as a couple of things a _lady_ shouldn't say, we fell into a rhythm. The thing I began to notice was that he was using the term princess in a way that was sort of clever." Kate explains.

Kate puts her coffee cup down and turns to sit on her feet on the couch and she continues telling Martha the story. "There was this one time, it was cold out, probably March, we were at a park helping out. Mike's taking this witness' statement and he says to me 'My witness thinks that the suspect threw something into that pond over there.' and he points to this little pond. It had a piece or two of ice on it but it wasn't frozen over. I stand there looking at it and he says, pretty sternly '_Go look for it!_' and I'm sort of confused, how the hell am I going to find what this guy tossed if I don't know what I'm looking for and how am I going to find it in the water?"

"Oh dear, he sounds like a meanie." Martha murmurs.

"He was, sort of." Kate agrees then continues "So I go over to this pond and I can't see anything and I'm looking around and Mike walks over to me and says 'Find it?' and I'm a bit frightened to disappoint my training officer but I said no. He smiles and he says 'That's what Franks over there said, he didn't think the bitch could do it.' and I'm a bit hurt, then Mike _pushes_ me into the pond, I'm up to mid calf in this _freezing_ water he's smirking at me and he says, 'Well princess, since you're already wet, why don't you just feel around with your hands to see if you can find it.'"

The elder woman shakes her head in disgust "Oh that's just cruel."

"Seems it doesn't it?" Kate answers.

"You don't think so?" Martha asks.

"Let me tell you what happened, then you tell me." Kate smiles at her "So here I am, my uniform and boots soaked, and I'm bent over feeling around the bottom of this pond for _something_ that _may_ have been tossed. Mike's smiling at me and walks away. I'm thinking some pretty nasty things about him and his ancestors but I keep doing my job. I'm _so pissed off_ at this point that I'm _not_ going to surrender to Franks or Royce or anyone else and I'll _die_ before I show them _any_ weakness. My hands get so cold that I'm relying not on the sensation of touch but my other sensations for what I'm looking for and suddenly, I found it! This guy had tossed a little handgun, small enough to hide in the palm of your hand and I found it buried in the crap at the bottom of this pond. I found it not by feeling the metal with my fingers but by feeling the difference in the bottom of the pond. It was slimy and sludge and disgusting but because I couldn't feel with my fingers, I had to feel with my body what I was touching and I identified the shape, texture and sensation by how my hand moved it in the dirt and how it translated up my arms and my shoulders."

Kate's almost glowing at this point "So I pull up the gun and am ready to tell him but Mike's walked _way_ across the park. He sees me stand up with something in my hand and he yells to me 'What'd you say _princess_?' and I yell back, calling him 'pin-head' and telling him that I found it and he owed me lunch. It turns out he knew I'd find it. I don't know how but he did. So, he intentionally walked away from me so that he was well beyond Franks and some of the other old timers so that I'd have to yell _right at them_ that I found it." wiping a little tear from her cheek she smiles "He knew that I needed to prove to myself that I could do it and the only way I could do that quickly was to try and prove it to others."

"I still think it's a harsh lesson." the actress states.

"It was but it prepared me for a few things. Mike taught me how to be a cop. All we seemed to learn in the academy was how to do paperwork. He showed me what we really were about. One of which was that the only way I'm going to get the job done is to not be afraid to get dirty and uncomfortable. Almost everyone there winced in sympathy when they saw me come out of the water dripping wet. We bagged the gun and wrote up the details on the bag and then I grabbed my notebook and pen and started to head over to get more witness statements. One of the guys on the other side said to Mike 'Where the hell's she goin'?' Without pausing or even looking at them, he says, very loudly 'To do her job! What the hell do you think?' to these guys who happened to be standing there drinking warm coffee." as she finishes, Martha's smiling too.

"I think I like this part of him." the redhead volunteers.

"There was a lot to like Martha. I stood there with ice forming on my pants writing witness information down in my notebook carefully and methodically even though I could barely feel my hands. Mike had made a point that even at this day and age there were guys who didn't think I belonged because they thought I'd get put off if I chipped a nail so I had to prove to them that I was more of a man then they were. And it worked! Mike, for all his foibles, was _determined_ to help me make it in this job. If I failed the only reason would be that I didn't try hard enough, not because I had" making air quotes "the wrong plumbing for the job."

Martha reaches out and pats Kate's hand "I understand dear but it does seem to be a harsh way of teaching the lesson. I too have experienced men in my career who felt that women should always wear dresses because it made access to their best qualities easy. I'm not sure that if someone was treating me like that it would help overcome it."

Pensively Kate explains further. "It helped to, as some would say, light a fire in my belly. I was so pissed at him so often that I didn't realize he was making me work harder and better than anyone around me. He also had a compassionate side but he hid it pretty well. When the effect of me working the crime scene in wet clothes was finished, he came over to me and, in front of a number of other people, said that I'd done a good job and he handed me the keys to the cruiser and told me to get started on the report. He said that he had a date for the evening and he didn't want to hang around while I finished the paperwork. What no one saw was him wink at me so that I knew he was letting me go warm up in the car. So, I sat in the car with the heater on writing the report."

"At least he wasn't a tyrant. Or at least he was a tyrant with a heart." Martha adds.

"He had a mischievous streak too. He used to tell me all these stories about the old days. I was so enthralled by the stories, I was hanging on every word. It wasn't until much later that I learned he was just making them up and pulling my leg."

"Sounds like he wanted to keep you around." Martha observes quietly.

"So, let me tell you two more stories. This first one is from about six months after that pond incident. There was this group of guys who had this macho thing going where they'd fake a combat like scenario and have to prove yourself. Mike tells me to come along to watch it. So we go to the gun range where it's done. They set up a little blind, just something you can hide behind as if you're in a shootout. Then they put a target down range that's about fifty feet away. You're supposed to come up behind this blind and put your dominant arm against it. For me that's my right. So I'm holding my weapon with my right hand and the target is down range on my right and I'm facing ninety degrees away from it hiding behind the blind and I have to pop out from behind the blind and shoot six shots at the target. Now because the blind is on the side of your dominant hand, it makes it more difficult."

Taking a sip of her coffee Kate continues "So here we are in the gun range and we're there with some other rookies watching them do this and they're all patting themselves on the back for their performances when Mike says to me, just loud enough so that he's overheard, that they're doing it the easy way. You should have heard the yelling that ensued, these guys were in full-on testosterone rage about this and Mike calmly tells them to get a bucket of ice water and he'll prove it. So they go and get one of those industrial pails full of ice and water and Mike takes a glass ashtray, they have them in the range to hold something hot like a shell casing or such, and he grips it in his right hand and holds it under the water and tells the guy with the stopwatch to count off thirty seconds. Now this water is full of ice and it is freakin' cold and holding onto the glass thing means that you can't flex your fingers to keep the blood flowing. Mike smiles at me and when the guy calls thirty seconds, he runs up behind the blind, pulls his weapon and shoots getting about a fifty score. The other guys try and some don't do as well, one guy even had to pull his hand out of the water before the thirty seconds was up but one guy does beat Mike's score by a couple of points, he gets like a fifty-two or so to win. There's a few of us rookies watching and Mike looks at me and winks. I can read his thoughts so I speak up and I ask to try it and they tell me no, I'm just a rookie and they don't want to embarrass me."

"Uh oh. Sounds like trouble coming." Martha laughs.

"Exactly Martha." Kate agrees. "So Mike yells to me 'Beckett, just be a good little princess and stand there and keep quiet.' As soon as he used the word I knew what he was up to. I got steamed and I said that I was going to compete and win and I would put fifty bucks on it to prove it. Mike laughs and says 'I'm not going to waste _my_ good money betting on the bitch, I'm out.' and he steps back with his hands raised. Now one of the other female rookies is going ballistic at Mike and he whispers to her that in two minutes, at the end of this, he'll escort her up to his boss to file a harassment case against him if she wants and this quiets her down temporarily."

Leaning forward in anticipation Martha asks "Did anyone take the bet?"

Also leaning in conspiratorially Kate tells her "Oh yeah, a bunch of the old-timers were all like 'Easiest freakin' fifty I ever made.' as they bet against me."

"I don't know the ending and I love this already!" Martha says giving a little hand-clap.

Smiling, Kate continues "Mike walks over to me grabs me by the hand and drags me over to the pail. He takes the ashtray puts it in _both_ of my hands and squeezes and says to me 'Don't be a bitchy little princess, see if you can do this without embarrassing me.' and then he sticks my _two_ hands into the water and puts his hand on my shoulder to keep them under for the thirty seconds. Here's the Mike Royce part. While my hands are underwater losing their feelings, he looks at the guy with the stopwatch and says 'You started that early! Reset your watch, I want her to get a full thirty seconds! No shortcuts for her!' The two argue for a moment about it but Mike wins and the guy resets his watch and starts the timing again. By now, I've already been in the water for twenty to thirty seconds and I have another thirty to go. My hands have passed hurting and are now numb and I'm fighting the urge, and anger, to kill Mike. Then, without my knowing, he waves to one of the guys to move my target back an extra twenty-five feet without saying anything. When the guy with the watch calls thirty, Mike looks me square in the eyes and says 'No tens!' meaning he didn't want me to hit the center of the target. So I pull my hands out of the water and I, remembering my previous lesson, feel without the sensation of feeling in my fingers. I pull my weapon and I shoot the target aiming carefully and getting four of six in the nine-ring one in the eight and one in the ten which means I won."

Kate smiles knowingly "The bastard knew that by calling me princess and a bitch he was getting my attention, lowering the expectations of others, and making sure I took what I was doing _very_ seriously. When the target came back, one of the old farts came over and looked at it and he said 'Lousy grouping there rookie.' and Mike said 'I told her _not_ to hit the center, if you look at your target, we see the holes but two or three of them are so close it's hard to tell that there were two shots there and you didn't miss with one. If you look at Beckett's target, you can clearly count _all_ six shots _and_, she did it at one and a-half times the distance you did.' Mike then takes his hand and holds it, like he's holding a grapefruit, over the holes on the target, then he turns and puts the same hand over the guy's heart showing that the shots would have had the desired effect on a suspect and looks him square in the eye and says 'She won fair and square. Pay her.' and he walked away from the guy who was fuming as he pulled out fifty."

"Oh he sounds like a devilish one. He'd have caused a lot of gray hairs I'd bet." Martha says patting her own hairdo and saying "Not that _I'd_ have any of course."

"_Riiiight_ Martha. _Suuure_. I'll believe that. Your son is _Richard Castle_, I'm _soooo_ sure he's _never_ caused you a moment of worry." Kate chides her as the two share a hearty laugh over it.

"Oh, the stories I could tell you. But not right now. I want to hear this second of your stories about how this Mike made you better." The actress says settling in against the arm of the couch for the story.

"Before I tell you that, let me tell you this little part. That rookie that was so pissed at Mike? He walks over to her and offers to escort her up to his supervisor. When she looks at him, she hesitates and Mike leans in and almost nose to nose quietly says 'Do not _ever_ rely on threats if you won't follow them up.' He points at me and says 'That woman is more man than most of the cops in this building, I do those things to push her and make her better. Instead of threatening me with the rules, she beats me and everyone around her by performing to the best of her abilities and making them eat their own words. Do you understand?' and he waits for her to collect herself, she was almost in tears, she fights it down and answers him 'Yes sir.' He smiles and shakes her hand and tells her 'If you are ever in a situation you can't handle, which happens to all of us at times, you call me. I'll help you. Or better yet, call her,' he cocks his thumb at me, 'and she'll kick their asses.'"

Kate takes a long draw of her coffee and dives into the next story "Okay, here's that other story. This was one of my first arrests. We chased this dirt-bag into the subway, Mike and I were right behind him and we came to a spot where we had to split up. I went down the subway tunnel following the tracks and Mike went through a door at the side where the maintenance workers go. As _soon_ as Mike opens the door, this guy starts screaming at him to back off and he's got a woman as a hostage and he comes out with a gun at the woman's head. He's telling Mike that he's in charge and he is going to leave with her and there's nothing Mike can do about it."

As her eyes lose focus and she transports herself back in time Kate continues the story as if she's reliving the moment. "I hear the commotion and yelling and I turn around in the tunnel and start to sneak back to where they are. I finally peek around the corner and can see that Mike's got his back to me and is facing the suspect. That's when the impish Mike Royce shows up on the scene." she says smiling warmly. "He yells to the other cops behind this guy to hold their position and not approach. The suspect yells at him telling him to get with the other cops and starts asking where his partner, me of course, is. Mike starts yelling 'That stupid bitch is probably doing her nails somewhere!' and then he starts this wild rant 'I don't know how the hell I got saddled with a goddamn princess who can't do anything right!' while he's doing this, he begins to work his way around towards the other cops on the platform. He's ranting and raving loudly about how lousy his partner is and how after all these years of hard work they stuck him with a broad. As he's doing this, the suspect _and _some of the other cops begin to commiserate with him! _He's got them eating out of the palm of his hand!_ The suspect gets so wrapped up in Mike's problem and Mike's making so much noise that this suspect isn't even aware that I've come out of hiding behind him. I reach up and grab the revolver in such a way that my thumb is in the firing mechanism and can't go off and at the exact same time I put my service weapon to the base of his skull and say 'I have PMS and a gun, think it over.'" which earns a roaring bout of laughter from Martha "At that he freezes in his tracks, releases the woman and let's me take his weapon from him. The woman runs to Mike, he scoops her up in his arms and turns around so he's between her and the suspect, he protects her with his body, he becomes _her_ shield in case any shots are fired. He walks her over and hands her off to some of the other cops on the platform for protection."

Martha, ever the performance junkie gives a little applause to Kate for her story "Oh that's so wonderful!"

Smiling now, Kate winks at her "He's not done with me yet. He turns around and looks at me across the length of the platform and yells '_Where the __**hell**__ have you been princess?_ I almost ran out of nasty things to say about you!' and while I'm cuffing the suspect, I yell back 'I was painting my freakin' toe-nails, _get over it!_' which makes him just roar with laughter and smile at me. Now I've got the suspect in custody and the three of us start to walk out of the station and one of the other old-timers on the platform nudges Mike and says to him, real seriously and quiet, 'You know Royce, you _can_ ask for a new partner assignment if you want.' Mike smiles and looks at the guy and says in a loud voice so everyone can hear him, 'I wouldn't trade her for a hundred others. She's the best there is.' and pushes me ahead of him out of the station." she finishes with tears in her eyes.

The older woman reaches around behind her and produces a tissue for Kate saying "I think I understand. He sounds like a hell of a guy." At the same time she gently takes her phone out of her jacket pocket and quietly sends a text to her son "_dont com home until I tell you trust me -MR_" and as quietly slides it back into her pocket.

"Oh Martha, he was. He was one _hell_ of a man. A real prince. I knew that _no matter what_, he had nothing but my best interest at heart. We were trying to break up a bar fight and I'm tangling with two guys who were too loaded to know they'd been punched and when I finally subdue them, I look up and Mike's sitting on a bar stool munching on peanuts. 'Thanks for the help there partner!' I yell at him pissed that he didn't lift a finger 'You seemed to be doing okay without me.' he smirks back. I knew right there, he was doing it for a reason. This time it was for the regulars there, they knew I wasn't a lightweight and that I could take care of myself. But, just in case, Mike already had his baton ready and his pepper spray in his hand to back me up if I needed it." Kate explains.

"Did he _ever_ help?" the actress asks concerned.

"Oh yes he did. He _always_ helped, sometimes just by being there. I _always_ knew he was backing me up. One time this _mountain_ of a guy was coming up behind me and the first indication I had was the sound of this monster hitting the floor. Mike had quickly pulled out his baton and took this guy's legs _right out_ from under him then looks at me and smirks 'You really need to pay attention there princess.' and he puts his baton away while I cuff the guy. This is not to say that I didn't get him back at times too. There were more than a few times I got to stand back and watch him fight with someone and give him a dig about it." brightening up she bubbles with glee and continues "Once he had this hellion fighting with him. Oh my god, Mike's like six foot tall and this woman wasn't even five foot and ninety pounds and she was giving him a _serious_ workout. She was just _everywhere_ and she was grabbing him in _all sorts_ of ways, he _finally_ pins her down and looks at me and asks 'Dontcha think you coulda helped?' that's when all the bells go off and I coolly look at him and say 'Jeez Royce, I'm sorry! I didn't realize you needed help, I thought it was foreplay!'"

"Woo hoo!" Martha crows "Payback!"

"Exactly Martha, got him good and he appreciated it. He actually seemed fairly proud that I got him like that. Meanwhile, the woman he was fighting with is _still_ trying to kiss him and wrap her legs around him. Oh but that wasn't the best. I got him good once and it topped all others." Kate crows with uncharacteristic glee "Once, when we were undercover, I basically _sold_ him to a member of a woman's biker gang so she'd snitch on her crew and he always remembered that one. You should have seen his face when this woman, she's probably five-five or five-six and two hundred and fifty pounds. She's _loaded_ with tattoos and piercings and in all seriousness and in open court much less, looks at the judge and explains that 'He completes me.' You could have knocked him over with a feather at that moment, his face just dropped and I swear he stopped breathing for a moment." Kate rolls with laughter then quickly sobers.

"What's the matter dear?" Martha asks concerned at the sudden change in her countenance.

"He and I were joking about this and reliving it only a few moments before everything went bad between us." she explains sullenly.

"I'm so sorry dear, I didn't mean to bring up the bad memories" Martha says patting her hand.

"It's okay Martha, it is just part of life. I try to remember the good with the bad." Kate says offering a squeeze of the matron's hand. "I've been learning that Mike, despite what happened wasn't bad, he just made a bad choice but he was man enough to admit it and accept his fate. I had a moment of weakness when I thought that maybe what happened between us caused him to end up where he was when he got killed. I heard his voice yelling at me telling me _'Grow up kid!'_."

Then, after a short pause and more brightly she says "The _one_ thing I'm _not_ sad about is that Royce and Castle won't get to pal around together and spend their days picking on me."

"Oh my. Yes that would be a terrible situation. Of course you'd know they both loved you dearly and wouldn't mean it." She explains offhandedly in a motherly way as if it's as obvious as the sun in the sky.

The verbalization and subsequent realization of the emotions blind-sides Kate and she just looks at Martha for a moment.

"Never bothered to say it aloud did you?" Martha asks gently smiling at the woman and patting her hand. "I think it is fair to say that your friend Mike may have thought an awful lot of you and you didn't realize it. Is it possible that he didn't think he could live up to his opinion of your expectations?"

Martha waits expectantly for Kate to regain some equilibrium while she stares off into the distance.

In a voice no more than a whisper Kate confesses "I was so in love with Mike. I felt like, like I was drowning and he was dry land." With tears in her eyes she voices it for the first time to someone else "I do think that he was really my first adult relationship. He was the first person who made me feel like a I was sharing a relationship and not a simple romance."

Again, Martha wisely waits for Kate to continue.

"He called me, after I found out he was involved in the case I was investigating and that he had lied to me." she says squeezing her eyes shut to hold back the tears. "I was so heartbroken but I could hear it in his voice, he knew he'd hurt me and I knew it hurt him to have done so." she bows her head down to hide her face. "He was the only person who understood the obsession that drove me. That understood my need for justice for my mom."

After a silent pause, gently, the elder woman asks "I sorry to ask Kate but I'm curious, does Richard understand that obsession and drive?"

"Martha..." Kate sighs. Shaking her head slightly "To tell you the truth, I'm not sure if Rick really understands it but he is the _only_ other person to understand what it meant _to me_ and how seriously _I_ took it. He's..." she stops as she chokes on her words and takes a shaky breath. "He's the first person to ask me about it and really listen. He never judged me and he believed me when I told him how deeply I felt about it." wiping away the tears now freely streaming down her face she chokes out with half a chuckle "Until Peter-Pan showed up," pointing at Castle's desk with her thumb "it was the only thing I cared about, it was my sole purpose in life. Now..."

Quietly Martha completes her thought "Now you're finding that you question yourself and you worry that you're abandoning your mother in exchange for having a life of your own."

Kate snaps her head around to stare shocked and wide-eyed at Martha. "I..."

Holding her hand up to cut her off "Kate, don't say anything. I didn't say it for you to respond to." Martha says quickly. Then very quietly she says "To answer the question that I see in your eyes right now, I can tell you that I believe this because it is written all over your face. You have a nagging feeling that by seeking a happy life of your own you'll be letting your mother down, maybe even breaking your promise to her." This wise woman tells her. "Dear, I understand it better than you think I do. I don't presume to know what you feel or how it affects you but as the mother of a child whom I love dearly and who, I believe, loves _me_ as much as you do _your_ mother, I can assure you that if it were me and Richard instead of your mother and you, he'd think these things and have these questions."

Sliding closer to Kate and putting her arm around her shoulders she quietly whispers "Dear child, let me tell you something as a parent. If Saint Peter came to me right now and gave me a choice where Richard's health or happiness was weighed against my health, happiness, safety or even _my very life_, I would have no hesitation. My child comes first. I would, without moment's pause, choose to forgo the balance of my time here on earth to assure the health and welfare of my child or grandchild. It is a parent's responsibility and _privilege_ to assure their children's happiness at all costs. Don't ever doubt that your mother would feel the same."

"How can you be so sure?" Kate whispers between shaky breaths.

Smiling, Martha squeezes her shoulder, lowers her voice and becomes very serious "I'll tell you a secret but you have to promise to never tell another soul. No one else on this earth can know this or that I've told you."

"I promise Martha." Kate quietly says in earnest.

"I know you do dear and I trust you." she says before looking around the room to make sure they're alone then she whispers even lower "I'm actually _slightly_ older than the twenty-one years I claim." Which elicits a hearty roaring laugh from the detective obviously releasing a large portion of the stress she's had bottled up.

Once the laughter dies down, Martha continues. "Seriously though Kate, it's hard to make it to this point in life and _not_ learn a few things. That, and my dear girl, because," pausing for dramatic effect "I can see it in _you_. You _are_ your mother's child. I can see it in the character and soul she gave you. I can see it in how you talk to Alexis. You're more of an older sister to Alexis but I can see the natural motherly instincts expressed in your dealings with her and how you treat her. I know, that as a loving and caring woman and not just as a police officer that you'd be willing to stand between that child and harm just as quickly as Richard or I would."

Martha reaches over for more tissues, including one for herself. As she blots the tears, she says "Katherine dear, we don't have to like it but it _is_ the natural order of things that a child will outlive the parent."

The two sit together silently as the waves of emotions and thoughts roll over them. Finally after much sniffling and tear blotting, Kate speaks up "Martha, if there's nothing else you've done on this earth, you've been a good mother and raised two good children, both of whom have inherited your remarkable knack for reading people and a flair for the dramatic. Although one seems to have missed the 'common sense' and 'maturity' genes."

"Thank you dear, that means a lot to me." Martha says with a hug. "Of course my work here isn't done yet, I still want to spoil a great-grandchild." and after a short pause, as she pats Kate's shoulder "And who knows, maybe another grandchild might be in my future if I'm lucky." causing Kate to blush bright red and hide her face again.

The two women sit in companionable silence for a while attempting to salvage what remains of their make-up.

Finally, without looking up, still hiding her face behind her cascading locks, Kate pats Martha's knee. "Thank you Martha. Thank you so very much for not just these few moments but everything you've done for me."

Smiling now with a warm glow she answers "You're very welcome my dear but there's no need to thank me. I'm glad to be able to help you and I'm grateful for all that you've done for our family." Earning a slight choking sound from Kate at the seemingly casual and obvious inclusion in the family.

After another long silence and another song change in the background, Martha picks up the conversation again "I know I sidetracked your plans for contemplation, I'm sorry."

"No you didn't Martha." Kate smiles at her. "I was already sidetracked and wandering around the memories. I will say this, I _am_ amazed at how much you've gotten me to talk. I don't know why I was paying Doctor Burke when I could have just dropped in over here." earning a shared chuckle from the two.

After another moment of silence Kate asks "Martha? May I ask you something else?"

"Of course dear, anything."

"I know what you said last night but do you ever miss your calling and not acting as you had been?"

Without skipping a beat she answers "Not at all. It seems that I misunderstood what my calling was. I always thought I'd be the ingénue on stage and in movies then time and, I'm sorry to say, gravity went to work on me. The roles got harder and harder to find. Not to mention that more than once I thought I was reading for the love interest of the male lead only to be told I was going to be his mother or worse, his grandmother. Those hurt. I had pretty much succumbed to what I believed reality was, that my career, as I knew it was over. Then, along comes this nice lady who makes a comment in passing and a curtain I never knew existed opened on a new act for me and I've never been happier."

Kate blushes a little and nods at the acknowledgement from the woman.

"Here again Kate, some of the benefits of this twenty-one years..."

A tiny giggle-snort escapes before Kate can stop it.

"_FINE_, I'll admit it... twenty-one _plus_ years. There, are you happy _now_?" Martha says in mock annoyance "Anyway, the benefit of time is that I've gotten to see things in different perspectives. One of which is learning to separate the proverbial message from the messenger. I was in a play with one of those actors from a daytime soap opera and he was griping about being typecast in the rest of his roles. It wasn't until many years later that I realized that the problem wasn't how _others_ viewed him, it was how _he_ viewed himself. He viewed himself in terms of that role and little else. I now realize that I'm still an actor and I still act at times but I get to share my knowledge with others. That I don't have to run to auditions and traipse around like a side of beef is the part I could never miss. The sweat and aches of a performance that flops is another thing I am happy to live without. I'm still in the theater and still involved in the creative process but now I also get to work with mostly young people who are _eager_ and _hungry_ to learn and get better. The only thing that has really changed is _my_ perspective of my role in Shakespeare's grand stage of life." as the actress finishes, she looks at her companion "Is that a fear for you? That you'll miss that which you love doing?"

Wordlessly, for the first time, Kate acknowledges it with a gentle nod of her head. Then, taking a deep cleansing breath she plows on "Martha, for the last... make that, for the _majority_ of my adult life, this is _all_ I've known. For a while my only purpose was to hunt for my mom's murderer. When I saw myself falling into a black hole like my father did, I stopped. It took everything I had to pull myself out of that mess, including therapy. That was why I was so mad when Rick started to look into the case. Since I extricated myself from that swamp of emotions and despair my purpose has been, hunt the bad guys, give the families justice, and protect those who can't protect themselves. I don't know if I can do anything else. I don't know if I can live without doing these things. I'm not sure I know who I am if not those things. This past Christmas, the reason I wasn't going to be here was because, ever since I was a rookie, I took it as my mission to take the Christmas shifts and let those with families go home. I felt like I was standing on the wall. Making sure to keep the bad guys at bay. It was my way of keeping everyone safe."

Martha sits quietly with her, rubbing circles on her back, giving the woman the chance to catch her breath.

"What happens if I..." Kate trails off, scared to even say it.

"Kate." Martha says quietly. "You aren't what you do. You are so much more than that. You just don't see it yet. Let me ask you something. When you resigned, you were making a statement to your boss right?"

Kate simply nods in agreement.

Martha, carefully and skillfully helps guide the woman towards her destination "But you found out, pretty quickly it seems, that you were making a statement to yourself too. Can you remember that statement?"

She sits up a bit and clears her throat. "_Ahem_ Yeah, I do. I remember looking at my badge and thinking 'I'm more than this symbol, I don't need to catch her killer to be who I am.' and I tossed it onto Gates' desk. I came here a few hours later realizing that I'd almost died, again, and I didn't get to tell Cas... Rick, how I really felt. I realized that clinging to..." she trails off. Her thoughts and emotions coming hard and fast. Slamming realities into her mind.

This time, Martha takes the box of tissues and gently plops it into Kate's lap earning her another giggle-snort from the woman.

"Have you ever thought about what it is, about your job, that at the end of a day makes you happiest?"

"No I haven't. As strange as it seems, I've never looked into it like that. Just yesterday I was telling Rick that until..." Kate pauses, embarrassed and unsure of how to continue.

Martha completes the sentence for her trying to ease the tension with some humor, recycling Kate's words. "Until Peter-Pan flew into your life."

The target squarely struck, Kate laughs a little and picks it up "Yes, exactly, until Peter-Pan flew into my life, I didn't really..." she takes a deep breath "have any tomorrows to think about. My life was the next arrest. The next puzzle to solve. The next chance to tell a family that justice had been meted out, the bad guys put away and their loved ones could rest in peace. I did learn one thing though. It seems that there are times that I'm as dense as anyone can be. I've learned..." she sighs as she tries to gather the words. Embarrassed and self-conscience, she decides that there's no use in avoiding it, Martha probably already knows what she's thinking. Dropping her face into her hands on her lap, she dives in "Well Martha, I guess, in for a dime in for a dollar as they say... I've learned that... I... don't want to do it... without Castle." she finally says squeezing her eyes shut as if she's anticipating physical pain from the admission. After only a moment of silence she turns to look at Martha who's smiling at her.

"See, it's not so bad to finally admit it. Just for the record, we've _all_ known this for a very _long_ time. As a matter of fact, I won the pool by default on this one because it took you two so long." She says pleased with herself.

"Oh my god, you too!?" she laughs.

"Yes dear. Me too. And Alexis and your father. Eduardo our doorman got in on a few of the pools too. That nice lady at the Java-whatsit place down the road, she's in on a couple too."

"A couple? What the hell is it with my... _our_ love life that makes people want to bet on us? How many pools are there?" Kate asks exasperated.

"I haven't the foggiest idea. I doubt anyone really knows for sure. No, I take that back, Doctor Parish probably knows, she seems to be in on the majority if not all of them." Martha says gleefully.

"I can't believe this. I want to crawl into a hole and hide from the world!" she says shaking her brunette hair everywhere in frustration.

"Wouldn't do you any good Kate. There's probably a pool on that too. Your friend Madison is in on a couple of the pools if that's any comfort."

"_**OOOoooffffffhhhhhhh!**_" Kate exclaims furiously. "I'm going to get her for this! _No! It's not a comfort!_" she cries falling backwards in the couch. "I can't believe this!" she laughs.

"Your dad told me about you being recognized as Nikki Heat when you kids were out to dinner with him. He said he'd not felt that good, probably since before... Well, anyway, that's when I happened to mention one of the pools and he asked me to put ten dollars in for him."

"My own father." she sighs. "Would you tell me what the pool is?"

"No, sorry dear. Doctor Parish has made it _absolutely_ clear that _anyone_ who slips and discloses that sort of thing has an open reservation on one of her tables. You'll not hear it from me."

"I can't win some days." she sighs. "That Nikki Heat thing was so embarrassing. I know he's going to tell my cousins about it too. I am going to be so very _very_ screwed at the next family reunion. Of course Rick thought it was hilarious. Even my dad took the opportunity to rub some salt into the wound. My Nana is going to just be so... I mean the kids and the cousins... _**Ooofh!**_"

Martha sits there smiling waiting for Kate to finish her rant. After a moment, Kate pauses and looks at the woman and realizes she wanted to finish saying something. "I'm so sorry I interrupted you Martha, please, _please_ ignore my discomfort, _do_ continue." Kate says with a smirk.

"It's okay dear. I think it's funny to watch you squirm over this, only because I'm trying to imagine all the ways you're going to get Richard back for it."

"Oh, I'm building a list of things that he's going to pay..."


	14. Caution, NEVER piss off the mama bear

"Gift from Beyond"  
Chapter 13**  
Caution, NEVER piss off the mama bear.**

* * *

Suddenly the calm is broken as they hear the front door open and close with a loud slam and they hear Alexis and Rick arguing as she tries to calm her father down. He storms into his office visibly angry and shaking. The women get up off the couch and Kate nudges Martha towards Alexis while she goes over to see Rick.

"What's going on Castle?" she questions as she reaches his side.

"_I want to kill that jack-hole!_" he yells as he snaps up his desk phone and hits the speed dial. "Hello, this is Richard Castle, I need to speak to Paula Hass _immediately_, I just got ambushed by one of those stalkerazzi." he says into the phone.

He finally turns to look at Kate and she can see the anger burning in him when their eyes meet. While he waits on the phone she pats him on the shoulder then hurries to the office door to look for Alexis and Martha who are sitting on the couch. Martha, comforting the young girl, sees Kate and gives her an 'ok' sign. Kate returns a thumbs-up sign and closes the office door and goes back to his side just as the call is picked up.

"Paula! This is Rick Castle. I just got assaulted by one of those a-hole stalkerazzi."

Paula snaps into all business mode "Oh my god Rick who is he and who does he work for?"

"I don't know, I've never seen him before. He had a video camera on us, blond, spiky hair. Had a screw through the side of his nose, real douche too. He caught me and Alexis coming out of a store downtown. She and I met up for coffee, she wanted to get a scarf and he got us when we came out of the store. Paula! _I want this guys gonads on a pike! He made __**my baby cry!**__ I don't care what it takes, he has to pay for this."_ he screams into the phone. _"_He stuck the video camera in Alexis' face and asked her if she was my newest mistress! He asked if her parents had to give her permission to date me and..." his voice catches, tears fill his eyes and Kate can hear his knuckles cracking as he squeezes his fist tighter "and then this ass-hat asked _my baby_ if I make her call me daddy when we're in bed! _PAULA I __**WANT**__ THIS GUY!_" he's screaming into the phone.

"Okay Rick, take a deep breath, I'm on the case, I'll find out who he is. Were you able to control your reactions?" Paula asks trying to assess the need for damage control.

"Yeah, we held it together until we got into a cab and then Alexis fell apart." he says holding his forehead, squeezing his temples, his voice cracking. "I don't know _how_ but I didn't do anything. The only thing I did was drop my phone and break it or I would have called you sooner with his picture."

"You did good Rick, you did really good. Where are you? Are you alone? Where's Alexis?"

"No, my mother and Kate are here at my loft, I brought Alexis back with me."

"Excellent! Tell Alexis I want her to stay there until I get a handle on this situation."

"She's not leaving for a while. Paula, I can _not_ stop shaking. I've never wanted to kill anyone before but this guy got me close to the edge."

"That's alright Rick, you're entitled to be mad. Let me talk to Kate."

"What?"

Speaking slower, Paula repeats the statement "Rick, everything is going to be okay. Take another deep breath please and let me talk to Kate."

"Sure." he says pulling the phone from his ear "Here Kate, Paula wants to talk to you."

"Me?" she asks taking the phone from him and interlocking her fingers with his "Hello Paula."

"Kate, thank god you're there. Keep him calm please." Paula says obviously relieved that Kate's there and concerned for him.

"Yes, I will." Kate says.

"Right now, the only thing that has happened is some hurt feelings, if Rick gets his hands on this guy we'll never be able to clean it up and I worry about Alexis and Martha. Kate, you're also in his cross-hairs. I want you to stay with them and not leave either."

"Me too?"

"Yes _you too_. We're already contacting our security firm. We'll have them come over there to assess what's going on. I need to make sure we find out who this guy is and who he's working for. So _stay put_." Paula says authoritatively.

"Okay, for a little bit but I have a job and he can't interfere with it." Kate reminders her.

"I understand but it's only for a little while. My office is already calling the security people so they should be on the way now. I'll check with them and call you back shortly." Paula explains.

"Right, you'll let us know what's going on?"

"I will. Please keep Rick reined in." Paula asks, concern permeating her request.

"Yeah, I'll keep him under control. I've never seen him this mad except at me." Kate says looking at the fire in his eyes and pure hatred. She can feel him shaking from the anger.

"I've never heard him this mad _ever_. We'll take care of you folks, I'm not going to let anything happen to anyone there." the agent says.

"Okay good, thank you. Here's Rick again." and she hands the phone back to Castle.

She pats him on the arm, says "I'll be right back." and leaves the office while he talks to his agent. She heads into the bedroom and puts her boots on. She leaves the bedroom and as she heads to the front closet she quietly says to Martha "I'll be right back, _no one_ is to leave _or_ answer the door until I get back." She opens the closet, takes her gun and badge out of the new gun safe and goes out the front door. As she heads for the elevator, she pulls her phone from her pocket and hits a speed dial. "Espo!"

"Yo Beckett, living the life of leisure with your boy?" he says with his usual cool manner.

"Yeah, thanks for the day off. Listen, are you and Ryan out right now or you in the office?" she asks.

"Can't stop checking on us huh? You can admit it, we know you missed us. We're out. We had to take some evidence to the D.A.'s office under guard. We're heading back now." he says cheerily.

"_Awesome!_ Do me a favor, swing over to Castle's place, we may not need you but I'd like to know you're on the way if I do." she says.

"No problem there boss. We're actually only a few blocks away. What's goin' on?" his cheery disposition melting away quickly.

"Good, thanks. I'll explain later but right now I have to do something. I'll call you back in a few." she says ending the call as the elevator doors open to the lobby.

"Eduardo." Kate calls out to the doorman as she walks over to his little podium/desk and stands behind it. As he approaches from the front doors Kate tells him "Stand right there please Eduardo. I don't want to be seen from outside. Is there a guy with spiky blond hair out there hanging around?"

"Yes Miss Beckett, he's over on 'that' side of the sidewalk" he says pointing with his eyes.

"Is he on this property?" she asks.

"No Miss Beckett, he's on the next door property having a smoke, why?" the doorman answers.

Still hiding behind him she peeks around looking for the guy. "He just tried to get Castle to assault him on video."

"I'll go..." Eduardo starts when Kate catches him by the arm.

"No, hang on. I have backup coming." she smiles thinking of what the boys' reaction is going to be when they find out what he said to Alexis. "He has rights but they have their limitations. His rights don't extend to endangering police officers." she says smiling wider at the doorman.

"Miss Beckett, you are _great_ fun to have around here." Eduardo says with a wicked grin. "You tell me what you want me to do."

"Thank you. We just have to wait a little longer for... ah, that was fast, there's my team now. Eduardo, let's play this straight, go back to your post and I'll come from the elevator to head out the door."

"Yes ma'am." he says smartly turning and heading for his spot just inside the front door.

When she sees the boys park the car, she starts walking to the front door. "When you open the door for me, stay outside so you can hear and see what goes on." she says as he starts to open the door for her.

Just as she steps out onto the sidewalk the creep turns on his camera and rushes to get in her way. "Hey! You're that cop that's boinking Richard Castle!" he says getting the camera in her face.

"I'm sorry sir, I don't know what you mean and you'll need to turn off your camera and move along." she says in her most authoritative voice just as the boys, having exited the car come to stand with her on the sidewalk.

"Are you guys also in on the orgy? You all screwing together?" he says pointing the camera at Ryan and Esposito obviously not aware that they're cops.

It takes all her resolve to not break out laughing at the look Esposito is giving this guy.

"Sir, you'll need to stop filming. This is official police business." Kate says showing her badge and still fighting to not laugh.

"Come on!" he yells as he turns the camera back towards the boys "Are you guys getting a piece of that sweet little redhead ass he's tapping?"

When he tells the tale of this day's events, he'll refer to this moment as "When all the lights went out."

The guy hits the sidewalk with a resounding _thud_ after Esposito decided to end the interview. He calmly hands Ryan the camera that he was holding onto as the guy fell out from under it. He flips the guy over like a dead mackerel and retrieves his wallet which he hands to Kate.

Kate, experienced enough to know what to do, says to the boys "Detectives, are there any new leads on the case you were working on from last night?"

They both look at at each other puzzled before they look at her and then say "No." in unison.

"Good, so we _did_ discuss official and confidential police business here." She smiles at them. "Now, let's see who we have here." she says flipping open his wallet as Espo cuffs him.

"We have a good citizen of New York named, get this guys, 'Archibald Bunker'! Gentlemen, you've just detained Archie Bunker." She says smirking. Looking up at the boys she tells them about Castle's encounter "It seems that Mister Bunker here is what some people refer to as a _stalkerazzi_, the kind of paparazzi who make it their purpose in life to stalk and pick fights with celebrities and capture it on video so they can sue for lots of money and sell the story to the highest bidder."

Looking down at the unconscious form and in an infantile voice Ryan says "He's _not_ a very nice man." with an evil smirk.

"Gentlemen, this... _person_... tried to pick a fight with a friend and coworker of ours, asking his daughter, on camera, if she calls him daddy when they're in bed together." She says watching Esposito's face turn almost as red as Ryan's. She can hear their knuckles cracking as they both make fists. "Detective Ryan, please review that video to make sure there's nothing sensitive on there from before he..." she looks down at the groaning figure on the sidewalk "... lost consciousnesses for no apparent reason."

Ryan and Esposito give a little laugh as they lift him up to take him to their car.

Ryan muses out loud "I suppose I should check the camera's memory for deleted photos and video to make sure there's nothing hiding there that shouldn't be."

"While you do that, I'll have to run a full background check on him. If a name ever sounded phony, I think this would be one." Esposito says with the same glee.

"Be careful boys, he's a loaded bomb in some ways. He's no doubt got a good lawyer and he's probably very familiar with the laws and rules, so pay attention to _every_ detail." she says laughing. "Wait!" she says pulling out her phone "Let me get his picture."

As she snaps it, Ryan says, "Detective Esposito, this gentleman's got a little cut on the side of his face here. Since we happen to be going to the medical examiner's office _anyway_, maybe one of the good doctors there can look at it for him."

"Of course Detective Ryan, that would be a great idea." Esposito answers back as the two lift the guy up so his feet don't even touch the ground. "Now remember Detective Ryan, when we're in the M.E.'s office, don't let it slip what he did to a certain intern that everyone there likes. We wouldn't want any bad feelings to develop that might endanger his health." Javi says with a smirk.

"_I_ just hope he doesn't become a statistic. One of those incidents of the paperwork getting lost in the system." Ryan says with a pixie like glee on his face.

"Oh gee, I hope he properly fed the meter or his car's probably going to get towed before he gets back to it." Esposito laughs.

"We'll have to make sure we take _good_ care of him." Ryan says almost unable to contain his laughter.

Laughing, Beckett thanks the boys. "Guys I'm sorry to run but I want to get back up there and see how Alexis is doing, she was pretty upset by all this."

"Okay Mom. You and Dad take care of little Castle. Tell 'em we said hi and we'll all talk later. I think this gentlemen might have some outstanding warrants somewhere and we need to investigate it fully." Ryan says smiling.

"Thank you!" Kate says waving as she turns and hurries for the doorway. As she gets there she addresses the doorman. "Thank you Eduardo. You don't need to worry about being called in as a witness or anything. By you just being there, it changes how things work and allows my guys to do their jobs better."

"You're very welcome Detective, please give my best to Mister and Miss Castle. If there's anything you folks need, please let me know." Eduardo says with a wide and warm smile. "Oh and Detective, if you would please ask Mister Castle for a printed copy of that photo, I'd like to add it to our book of unwelcome guests." he asks her.

"I will Eduardo, I will. Thank you again." she says as the doors to the elevator close.

* * *

A moment later, as she calmly walks through the door into the loft she announces "**I'm back!**"

Castle, still fuming, turns on her "Where the hell did _you_ go? Paula said to stay _here!_"

"I'm sorry to have abandoned you so abruptly. I just had to take care of something important." she says calmly putting her gun and badge back into the safe in the front closet. "It was just a quick meeting with the boys. Was there something you needed from me?" she asks innocently while taking off her boots. Then playfully she turns to Castle and says "Does that mean you missed me?" with a smirk on her face.

"Yes! No! Yes! No! _Dammit!_" Castle yells almost in a panic. "Paula said to _stay here until she calls me back!_ You shouldn't have left like that. What if the jerk that ambushed us was out there?"

Now, that she knows she's got him on the hook she has some innocent fun with him. Heading for the kitchen she starts to pour another cup of coffee for herself while she answers nonchalantly. "So what if he was? I have a job to perform and I can't let little things like that interfere. _Aw Ricky_! You were worried about me?" She teases casting a wink at Alexis who smiles in return knowing what she's up to.

"Oh my god! _Was_ he there?" Castle says, his panic rising. "I'll call Eduardo!" he blurts as he sprints for the phone. Kate grabs the phone from the cradle just before he can reach it and she holds up her phone with the half-conscience jerk's photo on it. "It seems this gentleman refused the orders of the police to stop filming them and move on while they were discussing official police business." She says smiling and showing the photo to Alexis too. "He said something unpleasant to Detective Esposito at the very moment that Espo, being the nice guy he is, swatted at a fly, accidentally knocking the poor gentleman down." to a relieved laughter from Alexis and Martha.

It is at this point that she almost got knocked over by Rick running into her and swooping her up in a big hug. "Thank you so much." he says in her ear.

"You're very welcome but I don't know what you mean Mister Castle. I happened to think of something that I needed to talk to the boys, I'm sorry, I mean _my fellow detectives_, about and when they came over to the building and I went to talk to them, this gentleman, who's name seems to be Archibald Bunker according to his I.D., interfered with us conducting our business. Ryan's going to make sure the memory in the camera he was using doesn't have anything sensitive on it, because we can't have that of course. Esposito said he'll take the time to do a _thorough_ background check to make sure that this is his real name and there's no warrants anywhere for him." she says smiling only to get a surprise hug from Alexis who came up beside her.

She squeezes the girl back. While Rick eases his grip on her. Still holding Alexis tight, she continues her business like demeanor and says "Detective Ryan noticed a small cut on this gentleman's face and he and Detective Esposito, since they _happened_ to be on their way to the medical examiner's office _anyway_, will ask one of the nice doctors there to look at it just to make sure he won't get an infection." earning a hearty laugh from everyone. Then, looking pensive, she says out loud "Gee, I hope they don't let slip what that man said to their favorite intern. That might be a bad thing for him." with a bright smile and a wink at Castle.

She can see the anger dissipating from Rick. Still holding onto Alexis tight, she starts to type on her phone with the other hand while she instructs him in a serious tone. "Now Mister Castle. I'm sending you this photo for one purpose only, you are to print out a copy of it for the doorman of this building, he wants to put it in their book of 'unwelcome guests'. It would be _totally_ inappropriate if you were to _intentionally_ forward it on to your agent and lawyer. Oh, and Alexis' school security department." then after a pause "Of course we all know that _accidents_ do happen."

"Thank you Kate. Thank you so very much." Alexis says giving her another hug under the warm gaze of her father.

She quietly says to the young girl "Honey, you should have heard this guy hit the ground after Espo ended the discussion, you'd have loved it. He and Ryan will take good care of him for you. I'm sure Doctor Parish will have a meaningful discussion with him too. No doubt centered on the wide array of alternative career paths available to him. Assuming he makes it out of there alive and still technically a man."

Releasing Kate, Alexis smiles in relief and gratitude and announces "Now that the excitement is over, please excuse me for a moment. I need to powder my nose." as she heads for the stairs.

"Powder your nose?" Kate asks incredulously with a touch of mock in her tone.

"What can I say, I was raised on the classics! Women should be _mysterious_." she laughs back with a diva's flourish.

Castle heads for his office saying "Detective Beckett, I'll go take care of that task you asked me to do."

"Thank you Mister Castle. You might want to call your agent to let her know that he's not hanging around your building anymore." she says smiling happily as she leans back on the counter with her coffee while Martha sits down at the breakfast bar smiling at her.

"What?" Kate asks her, confused at her smile.

Martha quietly whispers "Good job, _Mom_." with a wink making the detective blush and try to hide her face.

Trying to recover her composure, she changes the subject. "I seem to have sidetracked you too Martha, I'm sorry." Kate apologizes. "I was so wrapped up in my own mess I didn't realize how much of your time I took."

"Oh think nothing of it dear girl!" she waves dismissively. "Thanks to some of Richard's guidance, the business of the school runs well without my constant attention. I have the luxury of flexible hours. I am glad I was here to listen to those stories you told."

"What stories?" Castle asks walking back into the room from his office.

"Never you mind young man." His mother chides. "It was girl talk. The sort of thing men get nervous around." she says winking at Kate.

"Yeah Castle, didn't you have enough excitement for one day?" Beckett asks, enjoying the banter.

"Well, yeah but... I mean... Okay, I surrender." he sighs acting defeated and sulking over to sit on one of the stools at the bar.

"He takes some of the fun out of it when he does that." Kate says smiling in a stage whisper to Martha as she pours him another cup of coffee.

"Oh don't worry my dear." The diva announces "He'll make a fool of himself soon enough, fueling yet another round of jibing. Meanwhile, since life has returned to normal here, I'm going to take my leave of you folks and do my office-supply run for the school."

Castle looks at Kate and says "She finally has to buy her own, she's already cleaned me out." earning him a rebuke from both women simultaneously which he smiles at.

"Thanks again Martha, it was nice to share." the brunette offers staring into her coffee cup insecurely.

"It was my pleasure dear! Thank you for sharing with me." Martha says as she collects her things from the couch. "Richard, take good care of her."

"She says that as if I have a choice." He says to Beckett. "Goodbye Mother." he calls to her as she heads for the door "So Kate, now that the excitement is over can I interest you in some lunch?" Castle asks.

"What a lovely idea!" Martha crows just as she reaches the door. Turning around she deposits her things back onto the couch and asks "What would everyone like? I'm cooking!" she says earning a shocked look from the two. She pulls out her phone and says "_Well?_ What would people like? Pizza? Chinese? Burgers? Thai? Italian?" as they all laugh together, the pall lifted.

"Richard, we'll start with you, what would you like? Kate, would you be a dear and ask Alexis what she'd like? I for one am famished." Martha says.

They hear a "I vote for Chinese!" coming from upstairs followed by Alexis running down the stairs, her red mane flowing behind her. "Kate, Chinese?" she asks almost begging.

Without hesitation Kate agrees. "I have been wanting some for weeks!" Kate and Alexis meet next to the refrigerator "What should we get? Oh! I want some of those mushroom things with the covering stuff on them! Alexis, do you remember what they were called?"

"No, sorry Kate I don't but he'll know, I swear he remembers every one of our orders. We need some of that chicken thing you got last time too." Alexis says enthusiastically.

"Yes! Alexis, do you have any rice here? We can cook up some of our own." She says as they scurry back into the kitchen looking for a pan. "Tell you what, you start the rice and I'll..."

Suddenly, the two realize the room's quiet and they turn to look at Martha and Rick who are both just standing at the breakfast bar smiling at them.

"What?" Kate asks them.

"Dad? Grams?" Alexis queries a bit concerned.

In almost perfect harmony, Richard and Martha sing out "Nothing!" each with a wide smile.

"Mother," Castle says turning to his mother "I think if you or I didn't want Chinese for lunch, it's too bad. I suspect our minds have been made up for us."

"Right-o. Chinese it is then." Martha announces "With mushroom thingamajigs and chicken whatchamacallits. Richard? Do you wish to order something for yourself or will they decide that for you too?"

"I don't know Mother. Should I submit a request or just go along for the ride?" he says back to her as if the other two aren't in the room.

"Personally Richard, I think they're like dragons. Don't poke and prod, it just makes them cranky. I vote that you just go hide until the food arrives."

"Sounds like a plan Mother. If you'll be so kind as to place the order, I've got some work to finish." Half-way to his office he turns around and walking backwards calls out "Kate, please think about a nice gift for Kevin and Javier, I'd like to show my appreciation."

"Will do! Now go! We girls need some time to catch up before Alexis goes back to the dorm." she laughs as the other two try to give him a phony "Get out of here." glare while smiling.

"I'm going, I'm going!" he says throwing his hands up in the air in mock defeat and scooting into his office smiling wide.


	15. Fortune cookies can be true

"Gift from Beyond"  
**Chapter 14:**  
Fortune cookies can be true (and very scary).

* * *

Closing the door to his office after himself he smiles thinking "And _she_ didn't believe me when I told her that my dreams _do_ come true!"

As he sits down at his desk still smiling with a goofy grin he picks up the phone and dials his agent. "Hi, Rick Castle here, no emergency this time, I'd like to talk to Paula if she's available please."

"Yes Mister Castle, please hold on for a moment." the receptionist says.

"Thank you."

Sitting back and putting his feet up he finally relaxes.

"Rick!" the woman says, obviously relieved that they're no longer in danger.

"Hi Paula. Did you get the picture I didn't send you?"

"I was wondering about that. I didn't see my email address on it." she tells him.

"Yes, I did that by accident. That photo is the property of NYPD and I obviously made a boo-boo while trying to print it. You know how this technology stuff confuses me." he says unable to get through it without giggling.

"Yes, you're such a Luddite Rick." Paula teases.

Laughing at her poke he smiles "Thanks."

"Okay, I've called off my security team but I'm having them send a man to stay downstairs for the night with your doorman as backup. We just want to make sure. The important thing is, the worst is over. How's Alexis?" Paula says, her voice reflecting the change in urgency.

Leaning back in his chair and relaxing he tells her "Alexis is much better now, thank you for asking. She's happy and smiling but I suspect she'll have some minor mental or emotional bruising that only time will heal."

Paula asks "Is she going back to her dorm tonight? If so, I'll have security send someone over to be nearby in case there's a need. They'll notify campus security and either sit in the lobby or in their car outside. I just want to cut down the response time if something happens."

"Yes she will be. I don't know when. I'll talk to her before she goes to let her know that they'll be someone nearby for the day. And thank you for taking these precautions." He says sounding more like a concerned father than he normally does.

"I think you know but I want it clear. We're here for you folks if you need anything. If she needs someone to talk to, she's welcome to call me or anyone else here. I've dealt with this stuff before." Paula stresses.

"I'll tell her, thank you." Castle says smiling.

"You know Ricky, you had me scared there for a while." she says seriously.

Sounding calmer but still concerned he explains "I wouldn't have cared one bit if it was just me but not Alexis, you _know_ how I feel about that."

"Ricky, everyone knows that you're overprotective of your daughter. I mean really, hiring a twenty-four hour guard?" she says, the smile coming through the phone.

"_I resent that remark!_ I am _not_ overprotective!" he says feigning offense and smiling "I'll have you know I was _only_ trying to be patriotic! I just thought that the Marines eighth-infantry regiment could use some extra cash. I'm _telling_ you, they _would have_ blended in, she'd _never_ have noticed!" he finishes laughing heartily.

"I'm sure their camo outfits would have fit right in with the Columbia fashionistas." she says laughing with him. "Now that the crisis part is over, I need to ask, why didn't you call me with Alexis' phone as soon as it happened?"

"Yeah, we tried to but she couldn't find her phone, she thinks she left it in her dorm room when she ran out this morning. I have to call to get mine replaced after I finish with you." Castle explains.

"Alright but please make sure she knows to call if anything happens and make sure our emergency number is in her speed dial. I'd rather her call for nothing than have a problem get out of hand." she explains "I'm glad you called us right away."

"Thank you for interrupting your meeting earlier. I appreciate it." he says. "It seems that this guy, Archibald Bunker-"

_"What?"_ she interrupts him incredulous.

No, really! That's what his license says. Although, I happen to know that the authenticity of his name is being looked into by the police." Rick explains with a slight laugh in his voice.

"Oh I'd hate to go through what he's got in front of him." The agent says wistfully.

"Oh he's going to have a _very_ long day, probably even a longer weekend." Castle laughs.

Surprised, Paula asks "Weekend? Really Ricky? What's happening to him? I assume you'd tell me if I needed to know right now so..."

"We'll tell you the story next time we see you. You'll laugh. Trust me, he's going spend a _lot_ of time analyzing his career choices." He says laughing.

"Career choices! That's rich. I printed out that photo, do you think I should distribute it to other people outside of my company?"

"I think so, I was going to suggest it." Castle says. Then after a short pause he changes his mind "On second thought you probably shouldn't use the picture when you send it around. You should ask someone to make a good sketch from it and use that. I don't want them to be able to connect it to an _official_ NYPD photograph. You can use his name though."

"Okay, got it. His name. Like anyone's going to believe me with that. Anyone else you think should get it?"

"Will you notify Black Pawn?" Rick asks.

"Right, I've got Black Pawn, I'll also notify them about your upcoming engagements and I'll schedule security." Paula says slipping into her business mode.

"Okay good, thanks. I'll let my lawyers know."

"Security, that reminds me, I'll have to ask them if they know this guy. I'm looking at the picture right now and I swear I've seen him before." the agent says sounding a bit faraway.

"Isn't that funny! _I thought so too!_" Rick agrees enthusiastically. "I was wondering if he might have been the guy that picked the fight with whatshisname Baldwin a couple of years ago."

"If he did, he'll probably think it's a cake-walk compared to the hornet's nest he's stirred up today with Kate. Ricky, you are a brave brave man. That woman scares the crap out of me."

"She scares _you_? I've been put on notice by close to a dozen people that they'll never find my body if I hurt her. Remember, they get what's left _after_ she's done with me." Castle laughs.

"Wow, remind me never to cross her. It never seems to be a good thing to do." Paula says laughing.

"I agree. Crossing her never seems to end well for the poor fool doing the crossing."

"I'll say this, I'm glad I'm on her good side. Please tell her I said thank you for taking care of you folks but I _do_ want to talk to her about how to handle these things in the future. Just make sure you tell her I'm not mad at her. I don't want her thinking I'm crossing her." Paula says laughing freely.

Laughing he agrees "Okay, thanks. Yeah, I'll tell her."

"Anything else?"

"No, that was it, just wanted to touch base with you so you knew how it ended." he explains.

"Good. We're all set."

"Okay then, talk to you later. 'bye."

As he hangs up the phone he mumbles an imaginary conversation to himself "She scares _you_ huh? You don't _know_ what scared is until you see her pissed-off face first thing in the morning. That'll wake you up faster than a piping hot double espresso enema."

* * *

"Martha, I apologize for this up front. I know of no way to ask you this without making it sound like I'm saying you're old." Kate says without turning around as she stirs a pot.

"Think nothing of it dearie, as long as you remember my true age, all will be forgiven." Martha says smiling as she continues to set the table.

"Right, next birthday you turn twenty-one correct?" Beckett says with a straight face.

"You ladies want some tea?" Alexis asks unaffected by the conversation as she pulls down a cup for herself.

"Yes please darling." she says to her granddaughter and then turning back to Kate "Now Kate, we've been over this." she says with a slight huff "I'm twenty-one _now_ and at my next birthday I'll be _turning_ twenty-one. With that cleared up please go ahead and ask your question." Martha says putting dishes on the table.

"Well, when you were, how to say it, _more_ recognizable than you are now, did you run into jerks like that?" Kate asks the actress then turns around quickly "Oh Alexis. That smells delicious. I definitely will have some thank you."

Martha begins to explain "Kate, in some ways it was simpler. The times didn't allow for it to be so easy to pick a fight and then sue when you got your face slapped. I suppose because the dollars are so much larger now it's profitable to make it happen. There was some boundaries that, while not absolute, offered some resistance to those seeking to step over them. Alexis, she's right, that smells delicious! I'm sorry, what was I saying? Oh yes, boundaries. Before John Kennedy there was some unwritten rules about respecting _some_ boundaries then, after his assassination things began to really change. By the time we hit the 1980's everyone was fair game and the gossip-mongers had figured out all the boundaries they could push and began to really do so in the name of the first amendment."

Now walking over to the counter Martha asks "Kate, can you pass me those trivets? That change was about the time that sordid tales in the paper became acceptable and not just scandalous. As an example, that blow-out that Richard and Gina had a few summers ago at _Le Cirq_ was viewed as a passing piece of information these days but before then, back in _my day_, oh lord, how I hate even saying that! Anyway, he'd have been viewed as the culprit for not being able to control his outburst and the story would have read 'Poor girl embarrassed by brute in public.' and not really seen as a mutual exchange."

"So this was Kennedy's fault eh?" Kate says with a laugh. "Now I know where Castle gets it."

* * *

Hanging up his phone with a satisfied smile he sits back in his chair and revels in his little secret. "They are _so_ not going to expect this!"

He looks around his desk for something else to do but there's nothing left. He mentally runs a checklist again "Touched base with Paula. Check; Called the phone store, replacement on its way. Check; Flowers for the ladies. Check; Lunch handled by mother. Check; The three wonderful women of my life laughing together under one roof. Check, Check and Check."

Unable to avoid it any further he decides to do some work while they wait for lunch. Pulling his computer onto his lap and putting his feet up, he dives right back in. He opens his current chapter and reviews how he's gotten here. "No. No. No. I was right, something's amiss. I feel it." He says to himself. He reaches over and turns on his smart-board, selects the current section he's working on and hits the _expand_ button and watches as the board fills with building blocks and variously colored connecting lines. He sits and stares at the board trying to sort out his error. "Okay Castle. What the _hell_ did you do wrong?" he says to himself, noting that it didn't surprise him that the voice sounded more like Kate's than his own.

He pushes his laptop back onto the desk and turns his chair fully towards the board. Examining the wide and varied parts of the complex story he's weaving, his eyes sharpen and dance around, reviewing each and every component in front of him. It nags at him, the story's broken and he has to find the reason.

He picks up his yo-yo, a tried-and-true resort when problems like this plague him. Mindlessly he puts the string on his finger while he's standing up and begins the yo-yo spinning. The steady flick‑swoosh‑catch rhythm becoming a metronome for his thoughts.

* * *

"Bzzzzzzztttttttt" the doorbell breaks their conversation.

"Woo hoo!" Martha says excitedly. "Sustenance arrives! I'll get it!" she announces heading for the door and swinging the it open to find their favorite restaurateur making the delivery himself. "Mister Mancini! What a pleasure to see you again!"

"Herro Missus Logers. You rovery today." he says happily.

"Thank you so much Mister Mancini! You are _such_ a flirt! I don't know how your wife puts up with you. Please, here, let me take that from you." she says taking the food from his arms and heading to the table. "Alexis, please pay Mister Mancini!"

"Herro Miss Arexis." the man says smiling wide.

"Hello Mister Mancini! Thank you so much for the delivery! Please keep the change for your employees." the girl says handing him some rolled up cash.

"Tank you vely mooch!" he says as he leaves and Alexis closes the door behind him.

"Okay, where to start?" Kate says after watching the scene unfold.

"Personally Kate, I say we start with the spring rolls." Alexis says hurrying over to the table.

"No, I mean... I'm sorry, you get Chinese food from a guy of obviously Asian origin but his name is Mancini?" she asks as she grabs a large bowl of rice from the kitchen.

"Yes, his name is Henry Mancini." Martha says as if it's nothing.

"How did... Was that his birth name?" she asks.

"Actually, as odd as it sounds, he chose it when he came to the country. He said that he wanted a real American sounding name and he loved Henri Mancini's music so. Viola!" Alexis explains.

Looking slightly pensive Kate concedes the point "Well, I suppose that makes as much sense as any other reason one could come up with."

"He got to meet the other Henri Mancini who thought it was a great compliment and gave him an autographed picture to hang in his restaurant." Martha adds as she pulls containers of food from the bag "He has it hanging on his shop wall next to his citizenship papers, both under a USA flag."

"That's very nice. He sounds like a bit of a character. Okay, Alexis, what's the thing of the tip for his employees?" Kate challenges knowing there's a story behind it.

"Ah! Like I said Kate, I was raised on the classics. For a very _very_ long time it has been an insult to tip the victualler or innkeeper who owns the business himself. I just always remembered that and give him the tip as a gratuity to his employees." she says proudly.

"Yup, you're Richard Castle's kid." Kate says smirking as she sits down for lunch. "Speaking of which, should I go get him?"

"No need, he probably already smells the food and it will bring him out in a second. He'll get to a pausing point, save his work and come out." Martha says.

"Please pass the rice Kate." Alexis says "There are times that I'd envision him being carried out on the scent by his nose like an old Warner Brothers' cartoon."

"I can see that." Kate says passing the bowl to the girl. "Okay Alexis, please continue your story. I'm dying to hear what happened next."

The girl holds up a finger towards Kate "One moment. He should be out here by now..."

"Richard!" Martha expectantly calls out. "Tis time to feed the body and rest the soul!" to no response.

After a short pause "Yo Dad! _Get it while it's hot!_" Alexis sings like a ballpark vendor to laughs from everyone.

After another pause, they look at each other then Kate calls out "Hey Castle! We're not going to save you any. This is your only chance!" as they all laugh again.

"Hmmm... No response, he must be _working"_ Kate says making air quotes causing everyone to giggle "I'll go get him." she says as she rises.

* * *

"Haven't you heard us calling you?" Kate says poking her head into the office. The sight of Castle standing there, his left foot on his chair, in some bizarre Errol Flynn pose, leaning his elbow on his knee, flicking a yo-yo down then out with his right, while staring at the storyboard pulls her up short. He's obviously 'in the zone' and trying to work out a problem. She walks in and comes up behind him and gently puts a hand on his shoulder to try and break him out of his trance. "Rick?" she says. No response. A bit firmer "Rick?" with a shake of his shoulder and the yo-yo snaps back, missing his hand and bouncing dangerously close to the top of his thigh.

If she didn't already know his reactions well enough, the sudden outburst of avoided pain and the girlish yelp he released would have surprised her.

"What the?" he says in surprise. "Sorry. I..."

"I know Rick, you were working. Sorry to disturb you but lunch is ready and the others are already waiting." Kate says patiently.

"Thank you dear. Sorry." he says pulling his yo-yo off his finger. "I've made a mistake somewhere and I can't sort it out."

"That's okay. Come on. Some food and distraction will help you." she says planting a kiss on his cheek before turning and leading him by the hand out for lunch. "Look what I found." she announces to Martha and Alexis. "Seems a robot zombie has replaced our favorite writer."

"Sorry Kate, not likely." Alexis says matter-of-factly while spooning food onto her plate and passing the serving dish to Martha.

"Why not?" She asks as she takes her seat. Castle, ever the gentleman holding her chair for her.

"Robots have a better sense of time." the girl says handing a container of food to Kate.

"I'll remind you all, I'm right here. I can hear you." he says acting annoyed.

"Martha? Would you like some of this?" Kate asks ignoring his protestations.

"Yes please dear. Richard, could you stop whining and pass over the chicken whatsit." Martha asks.

Taking the container and handing it to his mother he mumbles "I understand Rodney Dangerfield more every day."

"Castle! Shhhh." Alexis is telling us about the professor in one of her classes Kate hisses.

"So when he said this out loud did he know who you are?" Martha asks.

"I can't believe he's so dense that he didn't. If for nothing else, my last name _is_ Castle" Alexis answers. "I find it unlikely that another prof hasn't said to him something like 'Watch what you say, Richard Castle's kid is in your class.' so I assume he knew it and was looking to stir things up in the class."

"Did you say anything?" Kate probes.

"Say anything about what?" Richard asks before biting a chunk off an egg roll.

"Richard!" - "Daaad!" - "Castle!" the three women bark in unison causing him to put on a deer-in-headlights look and make a zipping motion across his lips.

Alexis continues right along "I was about to but then I figured he was posturing, trying to prove some level of superiority and that the best way I could beat him at his own game was to give no response to the comment. I assumed that he would know I heard it and understood his jab but stepping around it gave him no satisfaction."

"Clever girl!" Martha says, mock toasting her grandchild with a fork full of rice and something else.

"Avoiding the confrontation is always a good approach." Kate says past a mouthful of food.

Looking at Kate she says "Possibly the only real-world applicable benefit of all the fencing I've done." then turning back to her grandmother "Ah but you didn't hear what he said about actors Grams. He quoted Truman Capote in a class a few days after that as though he fancied himself some intellectual giant." the girl says smiling stopping her grandmother in the middle of a chewing a mouthful of food.

Kate leans over and whispers to Rick "Remind me again of that quote."

Rick whispers back "The better the actor the more stupid he is."

He hears Kate inhale to speak and he puts his hand on hers to stop her. Expectantly he stares at Alexis waiting for what he suspects is coming.

Martha, unable to speak past the mouth of food makes a muffled urgent questioning sound "Mmmhuh?" with her eyes wide and expectant.

"Sorry, you need to finish that mouthful first." The girl said to her grandmother with a smile.

After a moment's effort and a wash down of water the actress announces "Alright dear, let's hear it." with a big smile.

"He made his comment towards the end of class. I looked at my neighbor and said none too quietly 'He'd make a _great_ actor.' which she, and a few around us, laughed at causing him to ask me what was so humorous. I tried to sidestep it but he insisted so I repeated it for the class." Alexis explains to applause from her grandmother.

"That's my girl!" Martha crows proudly.

"Oh no Grams, I got him _much_ better." Alexis lifts herself up leaning her elbows on the table enthusiastically towards her grandmother "On the way out I stopped and apologized to him saying 'That it wasn't fair for me to express such a conjecture based on something said by a profligate. While my opinion hasn't changed, I think that Jean Anouilh said it best when he said _'A good actor must never be in love with anyone but himself.'_ and I walked away." she says proudly to roaring laughter from everyone.

"Verbally bludgeoning her professors." Castle says with a mock crying voice "I'm so proud of my little pumpkin. It seems like only yesterday she was doing that to me." as he dabs at his eyes with a napkin.

"Castle. It _was_ yesterday. My guess is she's been able to do that to you since her first words." Kate teases.

"I'll remind you that _I'm_ the parent in this situation my dear detective." He says haughtily.

Almost bubbling, Alexis tells her "Kate, you should have heard dad while we were-"

"Alexis!" he snaps cutting her off.

"Oh, sorry dad." she says somewhat surprised and slightly embarrassed.

"What? _Castle,_ _what_ were you saying?" Kate demands.

"Uh oh." Martha and Alexis whisper together.

Letting out a deep sigh he hangs his head for a moment. "Go ahead Alexis. Tell them."

"Dad, I didn't mean" she starts.

"No it's okay sweetie, it's my fault, I'm sorry." he quickly corrects. "I just want to say Kate, it was an unguarded conversation with Alexis and I was, and am, trying to be supportive of you and still release my pent up energy in a way that wouldn't pressure you one way or the other. Alexis. Go ahead, I'm sure you two will enjoy it. Let me refill the water pitcher so I don't embarrass myself." he says smiling.

"I'm really sorry dad." Alexis says earnestly.

"It's alright pumpkin, no need to be. I'd have told her soon enough." he says passing behind the girl and giving her a kiss on the head on his way to the water. "We _are_ learning to communicate better. I just haven't seen her much since I got back. I'm sorry to have sucked the air out of the fun so quickly. Now go ahead."

"Well, okay. Kate, we got coffee and muffins this morning and we started to walk to the store and I asked him what was new and, well, to put it simply, his inner Jack Russell Terrier got released." Alexis says to roaring laughter from the other two women. "He was ready to explode. He was bouncing around and chattering a mile a minute, on an on about... I don't even know _all_ of the things he said he was going so fast. The crux of it was something about you" she says looking at Kate "getting a more normal job where..." she trails off. "Dad. I'm sorry, I don't feel comfortable with this."

"Alexis, no need to continue. I get the drift. Your father and I will be talking about that and a lot of other things soon enough. Yes, it's a scary and exciting prospect." Kate says kindly. "We planned on talking between ourselves and then discussing it with all of you, we just haven't gotten it done yet."

"So you're getting a new job?" Alexis gently asks her directly.

"Wow. This family." she says humorously sitting back in her chair. "Cut _right_ through the crap to the heart of the matter dontcha." she smiles. "Dear." again addressing Alexis directly "I don't... Sorry, make that _we_ don't know. _Everything_ about this situation, is confidential and _very_ new but I feel safe telling you that it would be a new position but I would still be with the NYPD. It would, however, mean that I'd not be on the street nearly as much." While examining her fingernails in her lap as a diversion she continues "The situation is that I've been approached and asked if I want to be _considered_ for this new position." she says giving a deep huff of breath. "It is all so new, I still feel like... I don't even know." she says finally looking up.

"Don't worry about it Kate, I understand that feeling." Alexis says warmly. Seeming to read the subtext as well as her father, she switches the track of the conversation. "So _dad_. What had you so lost in space that we had to send a rescue party? Care to discuss it?"

"Well, I seem to have broken a thread in the chapter I'm working on. I sat down when I went back into my office and read what I'd previously done and there's a nagging sensation that I've dropped a piece of the story and it bothers me because I was so pleased with where I ended up in this chapter." he says returning to the table with the water pitcher. "Anyone for a refill" he asks before sitting down.

"Would you like me to take a look before I get started on some homework? I figure I'll leave in about three hours so I've got a little time." Alexis offers.

"Thank you but I don't think you should take the time for this. You've got plenty of your own work to do." her father says in his _dad_ voice.

"Castle. You've got it backwards. She's the one who gets her work done on time. You're the one who needs to be reminded." Kate teases noticing the subtle elbow bump and smile Martha gives Alexis.

"I'll have you know that I'm _ahead_ of schedule. Or at least I will be if this mistake doesn't take too long to solve." he offers.

"Okay!" Martha announces clapping her hands together. "Let's get some fortune cookies!" as she gets up and retrieves a small bowl of the cookies from the kitchen and holds it out for everyone to grab.

"Kate, you go first this time." Castle says.

"Okay." She says slightly confused but willing to play along.

"Mother, you're next then Alexis. I'll go last." he finishes.

One by one, in their assigned order, they take out a cookie and crack it open.

"Okay, let's hear them!" Alexis calls. "Mine says '_Rarely do great beauty and great virtue dwell together as they do in you.'_" she says turning bright red as everyone agrees with applause. "Okay, Grams? What's yours say?" she asks trying to recover.

"I should hang this up in my school." Then using her 'presentation' voice, she reads it aloud "It says _'Don't 'face' reality, let it be the place from which you leap._' I like that, I think I might just make up that sign. I'm keeping this one." she says folding up the little paper and putting it in her pocket. "Katherine, your turn. You know the rules."

"I know Martha, we all have to read them out loud." she says. Clearing her throat "Mine says _'A pleasant surprise is in store for you tonight.'_" she looks at the paper then around the table. "I think I got a dud." she informs them.

_"_Hey!_"_ Castle says, "You got mine!" prompting Alexis to put her fingers in her ears and say "lalalalalalalala" causing everyone to laugh.

"Okay, then, I'll read mine." he says "Ahem! _'Be assertive when decisive action is needed.' _See, this one was yours. I'm sure of it." he says holding it out to Beckett.

"Drop it dad!" Alexis says smiling.

"Hey wait, there's one more in the bowl." Kate observes.

"Yes dear, that's the house's cookie. Mister Mancini gives us an extra for the house. I think you should do the honors." Martha says looking around the table for dissension.

"Oh no. Alexis, here, you go ahead." Kate says lifting the bowl and cookie towards the girl.

"Sorry, I agree with Grams. You open it." she says holding up her hand and smiling.

"Don't look at me, I don't have any say in the matter." Castle says before she even turns to him.

Letting out a sigh "Okay, I'll do it." she says uncomfortably. Cracking open the cookie and breaking it into four pieces she puts the pieces back in the bowl for everyone. The three pairs of eyes staring at her makes her feel self-conscious but she forges ahead "Ahem... It says _'Tell them before it's too late...'"_ she says staring at the little slip of paper and blinking back a few tears.

"Well Richard." Martha says brightly and quickly to relieve the pressure on Kate "You and I are in charge of the cleanup so let's get to work. We have a lot of leftovers." she says rising.

"How did I get shanghaied into this?" he asks looking around the table, his arms wide in a ploy for sympathy only to find none. "Okay okay. I'll do it. Mother, if you'll get the storage containers out, I'll bring things out one at a time for you and then I'll fill the dishwasher."

Without anyone noticing, Kate folds up her little paper and puts it in her pocket before standing and starting to help clean up.

* * *

_**Author's Note #1:**_  
Yes, I know my "Mister Mancini" is a poorly done (and too stereotypical) character. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to insult anyone either. I can't write dialog like that so I had to just try my best and hope it didn't come out too bad.

With that said, the guy who owned the Chinese restaurant near where I went to college _did_ adopt a famous Italian's name as his when he became a citizen of the USA.

Cute factoid. He had a standing game going. He would ask you three of the questions that he had to learn to get his citizenship. If you get two of the three right, your lunch was free. Sadly, he hardly ever paid out on that bet.

_**Author's Note #2:**_  
His "Inner Jack Russell Terrier" is from "The Proper Date" by sdara1 it so _PERFECTLY_ describes him.

_**Author's Note #3:**_  
Those five fortunes are the actual ones I got from a fortune cookie website _in order_ (although I didn't like a couple and asked for another one twice). So, out of seven fortunes, five were, I think, right on the money.


	16. Nikki Heat to the rescue!

"Gift from Beyond"  
**Chapter 15**  
Nikki Heat to the rescue! (Sort of.)

* * *

"No no, sorry there Missy." Rick says to Kate as she reaches for some of the containers on the table "This is my job."

"_Really_ Rick, it's not like I have anything better to do." she says just as the doorbell rings.

"Yes you do, you have to answer the door." he says smirking at her.

She narrows her eyes to a withering glare, "Why do I have the feeling you planned this?" Kate asks turning for the door.

Walking towards the kitchen and smiling with his hands full of plates, he sings out "Who meeeee?" proud of himself and happy with the way things have worked out.

She rolls her eyes as she gets to the door, when she swings it open, she's hit with a flood of colors and aromas of the biggest beautiful bouquet of flowers she's ever seen but with a pair of legs under it.

"Hi," Kate says smiling to the headless legs "can I help you?"

"Yes, I'm looking for a Miss Alexis Castle?" a small voice says.

Smiling, Kate calls out "Alexis! You have a present!" as she takes the huge bouquet, almost as wide as the door, from his arms. As Alexis comes to the her side, Kate says "These are lovely and they smell wonderful! They're for you." and she starts to hand over the massive bouquet.

"No ma'am, this one is for Alexis Castle," the boy says holding up a small bouquet with only a few flowers in it "and this one's for a Mrs Martha Rogers" he says holding up a small but larger than the previous bouquet. "Ma'am, those are for a Katherine Beckett." he finishes.

Kate stands there with this huge display of flowers in her arms. The colors and shapes and smells flooding her senses. Castle appears at the door and tips the young man as he takes Martha's flowers from him.

"Mother, these are for you." he says turning to her as she arrives at the front door. She takes them from him and says "Thank you dear! That's so sweet of you." with a pinch of his cheek. Then, more quietly "You might need some smelling salts for someone else." nodding her head towards Kate.

"Dad?" Alexis says a little at a loss, looking at the beautiful flowers in her hands.

"I wanted to get you some to cheer you up after today's events and I didn't want you to have too much to try and lug back to the dorm." he says kissing the top of her head.

Walking over to Kate, he gently takes her by the shoulders and walks her towards the living room, her hands still full of this floral explosion in front of her. He takes the flowers from her and puts them on the coffee table and encourages her to sit on the couch right in front of them.

Looking up at him her eyes filled with unshed tears she asks in a voice hardly even a whisper "Www Why?"

Looking at the other two, still standing near the foyer, he puts his hand on Kate's shoulder and says to them "Today's events reminded me how much you all mean to me and also reminded me that while I may _say_ that I love you all, I should provide you with a more tangible reminder more often." He finishes with a squeeze of Kate's shoulder.

He feels a slight shaking in Kate begin as he sees his mother nudge Alexis to move on and let him and Kate have a moment alone.

He sits down next to her on the couch with a big wide 'cat-that-ate-the-bird' grin on his face. He hands her a box of tissues as the emotional deluge breaks free. She takes it and doesn't even bother to try and stop the tears. He sits silently, grinning, just watching her and waiting for her to return from the maelstrom. He rubs circles on her back to comfort her and because he likes to touch her.

She turns and looks at him. Her mouth opens but she says nothing. He reads the things flashing across her face. He sees anger, confusion, fear, panic, annoyance, love, disbelief, determination and gratitude. When he sees what he thinks resembles lust he thinks to himself "I really _like_ that one!" and then he speaks up. "Kate? Are you alright?"

She closes her mouth, looks back to the flowers and then back at him. She opens her mouth to speak and nothing comes out. He smiles at her just before it registers that he's been tackled and is now laying flat on his back on the couch and 'emotionally grateful Kate Beckett' is trying to kill him with a kiss. When she finally comes up for air he finds his face covered in her tears as she lies down on him, her head on his chest and her eyes filled with the collection of flowers in front of her. There's no need to talk right now, she's just drinking in the beauty and floating in the emotions flooding her heart. He can still feel the moisture soaking his shirt as she continues to cry for joy.

After a few minutes, she sniffles and sits up making a futile attempt at collecting herself and allowing him to sit up on the couch.

"Feeling better?" he asks with a smile.

She smiles back at him but whacks his knee. "It's _your_ fault I'm like this."

"I'll take that as a compliment." he smirks.

"You would." she breathes.

"I'm sorry to have surprised you so much but I'm really not sorry at all. Thank you for what you did for Alexis and thank you for everything you've done for us in general." he says leaning in to whisper into her neck. "And like I said, I love you."

She closes her eyes and leans into his touch. "I love you too." she sighs then looking back at her flowers "This is huge, I've never seen one so big. I can't believe you did this."

"Me neither. You wouldn't believe how tempting it was to have it delivered to your desk." he laughs knowing full well he wouldn't actually do it to her.

Just then they hear the other two walking down the stairs talking.

"Richard?" his mother calls out then seeing them on the couch "Richard my boy, I have to say, you made an _excellent_ choice." she says.

"Yes mother, I know." he says stroking Kate's hair and looking at her adoringly.

"While we all agree with _that_ choice Richard, it's not what I meant _this_ time." she says with a slight tone of admonishment. "I meant the flowers. They are the _perfect_ color to compliment my room."

"Mine are beautiful dad. Thank you." Alexis says as she starts to clean the table again.

"You're very welcome. I'm glad you enjoy them." then turning to Kate he whispers "I'll leave you with your thoughts for the time being." as he stands and heads over to help the cleanup.

As he grabs some of the containers of leftover food Alexis whispers "Nice job dad."

"Thanks sweetie." he smiles.

"That's quite the arrangement. I think she's a bit on the overwhelmed side." she continues whispering to her father.

"I was thinking that. I figure that after we get a few things off the table and put away I'll see how she's doing." he answers conspiratorially as they march the dishes out to the kitchen.

After putting the food to be stored next to his mother and putting the used plates into the dishwasher he turns to head back for the next load and he sees Alexis, her arms crossed in front of her, leaning on them, over the back of the couch next to Kate. They're talking quietly but both of them have their eyes fixed on the not-so-small forest of flowers in front of them. Then Kate pulls out her phone and takes a picture of the flowers and hands the phone to Alexis to take another of her holding them. After another exchange, the two laugh and Alexis returns to her cleaning tasks.

"What was all that?" he quietly asks his daughter.

"What was what? I don't know what you mean." she says smiling at him innocently as she walks past him.

"Oh, it's going to be like that eh? _Fine!_" he says acting offended and in a huff but unable to keep the smile off his face.

They hear Kate's phone ring and she answers it in her usual style. _"Beckett"_ she snaps without looking away from the colors in front of her. "Hi! Yeah, I know!" she says suddenly animated. "Hang on for a sec." she says into her phone as she gets up and heads into his office leaving Castle still cleaning up wondering what's going on. He looks at Alexis and says "Any idea?" while pointing with his thumb towards his office.

"Yup." the girl says walking past him.

"He watches his daughter pass and waits for her to explain, and waits and waits "_Well?"_ he finally asks.

"Well _what_ father?" the redhead smiles.

"Arrrggh!" he spouts. "Alexis, are you going to tell me what's going on?" he asks exasperated and pointing to his office.

"Oh! I'm sorry dad." she says coming over and putting her hand on his arm. "I didn't realize that's what you were asking." As the relief of the pressure of his curiosity subsides she says "Of course not." with a smirk as she walks away.

"Good grief!" he says again glancing skyward. "Listen here Little Lady, I think I'm going to start limiting your grandmother's visitation rights. You're getting _much_ too good at that stuff." he admonishes, pointing a finger at her seriously, attempting to sound authoritative and fighting to keep from smiling but not being too successful at any it.

"Thanks dad!" she says brightly with a big smile.

"That _wasn't_ meant as a compliment!" he says still attempting to sound stern but still smiling at his baby.

"Oh sorry." she says acting as if she's putting on a serious face. Then, in an obviously fake demeanor of an obedient child "I'm _so_ sorry dear father-of-mine I... Awww crap, I can't even say it with a straight face." she says laughing at him. "Dad..." she says gathering her thoughts then "Oh, why bother, you'll figure it out on your own sooner or later." she smirks as she scoots by him as he tries to snap her backside with the dishtowel he has in his hand, both of them laughing at each other's antics.

"Martha Rogers, do you _see_ what you've done?" he says to his mother.

"Yes I do dear and I couldn't be prouder." she says smiling without looking up.

"I can't win." Castle says defeatedly.

"See dad?" Alexis says passing him as she walks to the kitchen "I _knew_ you'd start to figure it out on your own."

"Thanks." he says dejectedly.

"You know Grams, I _am_ a little disappointed at how long it has taken him to arrive at this realization." she says.

"I know dear. Don't worry, over time you begin to get accustomed to the disappointment." his mother explains with a serious face without looking up from her tasks.

"I'll remind you both, _again_, I'm _right here_ and I can hear you." He announces, smiling wide, from across the room. His heart warmed by the banter and the love they show for each other.

"Hey Castle." Kate calls as she comes out of his office still dabbing at her eyes.

She catches him as he's just reaching into the ice-maker for a piece of ice to chase Alexis with. "Are you okay?" he asks truly concerned.

"Huh? Oh! Yes, sorry. I was just talking to Lanie and we had a few laughs." she explains. "Rick, is what you have on your smart-board the section you're having problems with?"

"Yes, why?" he asks as he lets go of the ice-cubes, closes the freezer and heads over to where she is near the door.

"I think I see your problem. Would you..."

"Show me!" he says enthusiastic and smiling as he grabs her by the arm and hurries into his office dragging her in with him.

"_But!_" Kate says in protest before disappearing through the door.

"That's okay dear, we're just about done." Martha calls back to the suddenly empty room.

Stopping in front of the board he tells her "Go ahead! I'm dying to hear what you found." while almost unable to contain his excitement.

"Is this saved? I want to make a change without damaging the original." she says standing in front of the board with her hand raised ready to touch it.

"Yes, go ahead." he says sitting back against his desk. Every fiber of his being enthralled with the idea of her helping him on a story.

"I haven't looked at the previous section but based on what I know of you and your writing, I think..." she says as she touches a line to select it "that if you" now dragging an endpoint of the line "make this line connect to this box" releasing the line at a different place "and we then take _this_ line" repeating the action for a different connection "and move it here and lastly, we change the origin of" touching a line "this... to here" she says releasing the line "it might..."

"_HOLY CRAP!"_ he explodes jumping to his feet, mouth open in shock and eyes wide staring at the board and the changes she made.

"I'm sorry did I mess..." she starts to say sheepishly.

"Katherine Beckett, you are freakin' _brilliant!_" he says still staring at the board.

Looking a little shocked she glances at the board then back to him. "Why? What? What'd I do?"

He reaches over and picks her up in a big hug with one of his hands firmly grasping her butt cheek.

"Castle, cheep feels aside, what are you so happy about?" she laughs.

"Kate, you..." he says as he puts her down but still ensconced in a tight embrace and points at the board "You just fixed my problem."

"Good! I'm glad." she says satisfied but still in awe of the work he does.

"No, dear, you... fixed the problem _better_ than I had planned. You just put an amazing twist in the story!" he says beaming at her. "You are going to be responsible for one of the biggest gasps coming from my readers that they may have ever released."

"Really?" she asks surprised.

"Absolutely. If I change this" he says touching the board "from a very specific warehouse" (tap tap tap) "to a storage facility like a mover would have" (tap tap tap) "that is full of assorted left-over crap then" (tap tap tap tap) "we end up with a whole" (tap tap) "array of stuff that might be used by Nikki and Raley and then Ochoa and Rook can..." he trails off, his face bright and happy and his eyes dancing over the screen.

She looks at him with a renewed awe at the workings of his mind and smiles at the satisfaction of his glee at her idea. She waits to see what he does and it's obvious that he's gone back 'into the zone' and won't be much to talk to for a while. As she turns to leave, she hears him let out a little giggle and press the speed dial button on his desk speaker phone.

"Hello, Black Pawn Publishing." says a disembodied voice.

Without even pausing in his actions of working on the storyboard he says "This is Rick Castle, I need to leave a message for Gina Cowell please."

"Yes sir. I can do that for you." she says.

As he sits down and reopens his laptop he tells her "Please tell Gina that I said the last two chapters I sent her are now trashed and I'll be in touch with her later about an update."

"Yes sir, last two chapters trashed, will contact later. I have it and will make sure she gets it when she comes back from lunch." the voice says. "Is there anything else I can do for you?"

"No thank you Cassandra." he says reaching for the button to hang up the connection.

"Thank you and good bye sir." the woman says knowing the conversation had already ended.

He quickly assumes his 'writing pose' and as his fingers begin to fly over the keyboard, he's smiling and chuckling lightly to himself, lost in his world. She watches for a moment before she leaves the office and closes the door quietly behind her.

"Is he gone?" Martha asks upon seeing Kate leave the office.

"Oh yeah, he is _gooooone_." Kate laughs back making a waving hand motion.

"What did Doctor Parish say about the flowers?" Alexis asks.

"You were right. She got all angry and asked '_What did he do wrong?'_ then I told her the story and she forgave him." Kate says as they all laugh about it.

"So, that's another ten you owe me." the girl smirks moving about the kitchen.

"You have an unfair advantage. You've been dealing with him longer than me." Kate says almost as if she's pleading her case as she walks over to join the other two in the kitchen.

"Doesn't matter, this was about knowing Doctor Parish." Alexis smirks "Remember, cash only, no credit cards."

"I think I see why your father's so scared of you." Kate smiles.

"Hey, by the way, what'd Doctor Parish say about, you know, what went on this morning." Alexis asks.

"She started to tell me and I stopped her, I don't want her to say too much while she's in the office and possibly get anyone in trouble. However, just by the way she was laughing, I suspect he's already had a very long afternoon and his adventure is _far_ from over." Kate says pouring herself another cup of coffee.

Martha takes a lull in the conversation as her cue to announce "Now that we're all back to normal and well fed, I think I'll try to make my office supply run again." she says picking up her bag and coat from the couch.

"Okay Grams." Alexis says heading over to her for a hug.

"What time do you think you're leaving?" she asks the girl.

"I'm not sure Grams, I was thinking of doing some homework here where its quiet before I go back."

"Okay, if you want company for the ride back, let one of us know and we'll take you."

"Martha," Kate says from across the room, "I think Rick's already expecting to personally escort her back and I don't think any of us are going to be able to talk him out of it."

"You're probably right Kate." now addressing her granddaughter "Well, the offer still stands. I know your father wants to be overly protective but _some_ caution _is_ wise my dear."

"I know Grams." She says with another hug.

"Love you." the girl says giving her grandmother a squeeze.

"I love you too dear." the woman says back as she heads for the door. "Ta-ta Daahlings." the diva says closing the door behind her.


	17. Welcome to life on Page 6

"Gift from Beyond"  
**Chapter 16**  
Welcome to life on "Page 6"

* * *

Staring at the door, as Alexis walks back towards the stairs, Kate smiles and asks "Does she ever _not_ make an entrance or exit?"

"To tell you the truth Kate, even when she's doing the 'walk of shame' she's not very subtle." Alexis says and shaking as if she got a chill to express her distaste of the idea "Blech!" to Kate's laughter.

"I suspected as much." the detective mumbles then more brightly "Hey, before you bury yourself in your school work, how are you feeling now?" she asks the girl.

Taken a little off balance at the interest in her well-being, Alexis stops at the bottom of the stairs and thinks for a moment. "I'm okay I think. I've been around Dad and Grams when there's been nasty reporters and photographers but this guy was pretty bad. It's the first time I've been accused of sleeping with someone old enough to be my father. I can't say it was pleasant." she says sitting down on the stairs.

"I assume that you're aware of how he makes his living right?" Kate asks.

"Dad started to say some things but I was too discombobulated at the time to focus. I assume getting controversial shots or shots that they can twist to say what they want is a lot of it."

"They used to be more prevalent a while back. You might have been too young to pay attention to it. They're what used to be called stalkerazzi. Paparazzi who go out of their way to be intrusive but also, some of them, like this guy seems to have been, make a point of picking a fight. They very carefully set themselves up to be the target of a punch or push or such and they capture it on film/tape, whatever, and then sue the celebrity who'll pay to avoid the publicity and annoyance."

"I remember now." The girl says, recognition hitting home. "I remember talking to my dad about them. I thought there were laws to keep them from getting the upper hand?"

"It's a complex issue. There are arguments that it is within their first-amendment rights to get photos but they still can't pick a fight with impunity." Kate says taking a sip of her coffee.

"Despite all my experiences, I still cannot fathom how someone can think that it would be their business who's doing what with whom." the girl says pensively.

Kate walks over and sits down on the steps next to her but leaves a reasonable space between them to keep from being intrusive. "I don't know either." the woman says. "I've never understood it. All those times I'd see stuff in the papers or magazines or even on the news, I always found it strange that people's personal lives weren't their own." Kate says.

"And now you're living it." the redhead observes astutely.

"Yes. Yes I am." Kate says thoughtfully, somewhat taken aback at the voicing of the fact. "If someone told me a couple of years ago that I'd be fodder for the 'Page Six' crowd, I'd have told them they were crazy, now..."

"Now it's a part of your life." Alexis answers for her.

Letting out a sigh Kate agrees "It is and it scares the _crap_ out of me at times."

Putting her hand on the woman's arm she asks "I don't mean to make it sound like I'm trying to scare you Kate but I have to ask, you _do_ realize that it's going to get worse right? If the next movie comes out it'll be worse than the last one and dad's getting to the end of _another_ book in the series and you know how it gets around the release date."

Sighing in acceptance Kate agrees. "I know. I know. I had a nightmare the other night about it. I'd like to blame it on some of your dad's cooking but I can't be sure. I woke up in a _horrible_ panic. I dreamt I was trying to investigate an incident during the release party and everyone was walking all over my crime scene and I was wearing a strapless miniskirt trying to examine the scene without flashing the photographers. It was _not_ pleasant."

The girl laughs with her sympathetically saying "I don't know if it was or not but I'd _definitely_ blame his cooking for that one."

"I'd like to but I think that just the terror of being on Page 6 and embarrassing myself in front of our families festered after he he told me that Black Pawn has set the release date for the next book."

After a pause Alexis seizes the opportunity to understand this woman better, asking "I bet you'd like to have your old life back." while watching her responses with a critical eye.

While staring into her coffee cup that she has held between both hands and resting her weight onto her elbows on her knees Kate quietly asks "Mind if I tell you something?"

"Of course not." Alexis encourages.

Kate takes a deep breath. "I..." she starts and falters, shaking her head in a silent self admonishment. She clears her throat and distractedly she turns the cup around in her fingers. "The... ahhh" she fails again. She closes her eyes, sits up straight and steels herself for the task. "This disclosure stuff can be _so_ difficult." she laughs breaking the tension. Determined, she forces herself to say it without pausing. "Yes, I'd like to have the privacy and anonymity back but other than that, my answer is a resounding _no_." She says firmly. The impact of her statements surprising even her. "It sounds funny to say it out loud." she voices to no one in particular as a sideways comment. Then, after a moment for it to sink in she continues "The fact of the matter is Alexis, I wouldn't trade a minute of my life now for _anything_. Your father. You. Your grandmother. I'm not willing to lose _any_ of it. I don't like the glitz and extravagant side of this life in the Castle household but I consider my involvement in it and the challenges to my... _Crap_, see that? I did it again." she says smiling self-consciously "The challenges to _our_ privacy to be a reasonable cost to pay for the..." she stops again. She squeezes her eyes tight in resolve, her fingers turning white as she squeezes the coffee cup. She swallows the lump in her throat and continues in a hoarse voice "for the love I am _privileged_ to share in."

If she was looking, Kate would be surprised and probably pleased by the smile and look of acceptance on the girl's face.

Still speaking in a whisper "Sitting around that table with your family" Kate says, her eyes still shut, nodding her head towards where they just had lunch "was something I cherish and don't ever want to lose. Almost six years ago, when your father showed up, it was... I'm not sure how to word it. My mother's death was still an open wound and I always hurt, I never knew real joy, only a few moments of the lack of angst. I mistook those moments for..." she says trailing off.

Putting her hand on the woman's arm and leaning in the young girl whispers "I'm glad. I think it's safe to say that it is _our_ family now Kate." after a pause to collect her thoughts, she tells her "You know that I worry about him-"

Whispering now Kate concedes to the biggest issue between her and the girl by finishing the statement for her "And how I hurt him, more than once, and yet seemed to be callous about it." Pausing to collect her thoughts again she dives right back in "I can assure you Alexis, that it hurt me too when I did those things to him. While it may seem otherwise, I promise, I didn't do any of them out of malice. I was just stupid. A _stupid_ and _childish_ fool who reverted back to be a lone and lonely girl. I retreated back to where I always went, where I thought I was safe, being alone. It turns out I was wrong, I wasn't safe, I was just alone. So very _very_ alone. I thought I wouldn't hurt there but it turns out I brought all my hurt with me and it never diminished. It was so bad that, I don't think if I can judge it accurately, but I'm _sure_ that it got worse, just feeding on itself."

Displaying remarkable maturity beyond her years, Alexis waits, saying nothing, waiting for Kate to finish her thoughts.

In an almost breathless whisper Kate, still staring into her coffee cup, continues "For the rest of my days, I'll be trying to make up for those hurts I caused your father and those of you who love him. I have times where I have to remind myself to not respond out of habit but to _think_ first. Every time I start to respond habitually, I remember, the pained look on..." she shakily inhales sharply "on his face when I... _didn't_ think and I... I _hurt_ him, cutting him to the quick." she says, the tears welling up. As the tears flow, Kate gently pulls back the lapel of her blouse "This wound that I carry here? It hurt. White-hot searing pain throughout every cell of my body. My entire being screamed in pain. It ripped through me leaving death in its wake. It was sent _intentionally, purposely,_ to hurt me, to _destroy_ me. Wanna know something strange Alexis?" she asks. Then without stopping "I'll take another of these over the pain I feel when I think of how I hurt him. This hateful act of pure evil left a scar but it has healed." Reaching into her shirt and touching the scar "I can press it and it doesn't hurt. No pain. This little mark is all that's left of that horrible calculated act. However, the wounds I caused that man, you and his mother through _nothing_ but sheer ignorant stubborn thoughtlessness on my part, won't heal over so quickly. All I need to do is remember his face when-" she inhales quickly again, the emotion almost winning, her voice cracking "his face at that moment that I snapped at him, responding by habit and I feel the pain of that wound _ripped_ open again." her tears dripping down her face and splashing in her coffee cup. "He gave me so much and I didn't even see it. He gave me..." she takes another shaky breath "...gave and asked for... so... so _very_ little." she says the tears flowing freely.

Whispering now, she continues, the dam broken, the words continuing to spill out. "I'm learning to talk to him. I'm telling him everything I can think of. I want this to work. I still haven't told him about all of my time in the cabin after being shot. I'll tell _you_ this one thing but you have to remember it is up to _me_ to tell your father." Without even waiting for an answer she plows on, the emotions having been burned out now and the words just pouring forth for this girl she cares so much about. "Every day that I was there, _more_ than once every day, I wanted to call and hear his voice. I wanted him to tell me it would be okay. I couldn't because I was..." she pauses for a moment, obviously reflecting "Not _was,_ I _still am,_ but I'm getting better at it. I was terrified that I'd lose him too. I also knew..." she says, her voice barely audible.

She hears Alexis inhale to speak and she puts her hand on her knee to stop her. The words are flowing and she doesn't want them to stop. She leans her head over just enough to touch the red hair cascading off the girl's shoulders and continues whispering "I have been on my own for a very long time. It was a learned response. When my life fell apart, I turned inward. I did it after my shooting and I'm damned if I'm going to let it happen again. I had a lot of things to think about. For the first time in my life I had a shot at happiness. I screwed it up so badly that I didn't think I'd be able to fix it. That was when I realized that _before_ I could fix what happened between us, not just me and your dad but me and you too, I had to be the person he deserved, not the broken shell sitting in that cabin. I had to fix _this_ broken person." she says pointing to her heart.

"One more thing I want you to know. Its one of the reasons that I just told you that..." She tries to think of how to say it and nothing works so she just opens the door and lets the words flow out again. "One of the reasons I couldn't call your dad while I was away... was... you."

"_What?"_ the girl asks shocked and incredulous. Her loud surprise piercing the quiet bubble around them.

"Shhhh..." Kate coos patting her knee. "It wasn't your fault, don't think I'm saying that. The problem was that that fool in there" she says pointing towards his office "actually dove at me to try and save my life and could have cost you your parent." The waterworks turn on again at the voicing of the statement. "I was _so_ mad at him for that _one_ thing. The horror I felt at the idea of being the reason that you might have lost your dad almost killed me itself. I have told him this before. I made a deal. When I swore that oath and put that badge on, I knew it could happen to me but it _cannot_ happen to him _because_ of me. It _will not_." she sniffles and finally says one of the things that terrifies her the most, in a hoarse whisper she confides "Alexis, I..." she pauses trying to find the courage but sidesteps it somewhat "I... care about you too much to let that happen to you."

"It's okay Kate. We know and we understand." the young woman says quietly.

With a half laugh, half sniffle, Kate composes herself marginally and shaking her head teases "Are you _really_ sure you're related to anyone in this family?" with a friendly shoulder bump to the young girl who smiles warmly in response.

After a long silent pause while Kate tries to collect herself, as the two sit in companionable silence, Alexis decides to share something. In a whisper she exposes some of herself. "Since we're sharing secrets, I'll tell you one that no one else knows. There _was_ a time that I _did_ wonder about it. When I learned what my mom did to my dad, it made me wonder. I cried for days and days when the pieces clicked. I felt like I couldn't even _look_ at my dad, like just by being here I was lying to him and..." the girl trails off.

Sobering abruptly Kate puts her coffee cup down and slides over to wrap both arms around her and hold this precious girl as she bares a deep dark secret of her soul.

"Then one day, very suddenly, like a bolt of lightning, I realized that I really _was_ his daughter and if, by some strange quirk of the cosmos I wasn't _his_ blood, he was still my _dad_ and _father_ and I had no need to question it further nor did I have any doubts about where I belonged. He loves me unconditionally and I love him. That's all that matters."

"You're so very right. That _is_ all that matters." the detective says squeezing the girl tight. "Do you mind if I ask how you found out? I should probably also tell you that _he_ has no doubts of any kind that you are his baby girl. He told me what your mom did a while ago."

"Thanks for telling me that. Yeah, I know how assured he is of it." Alexis says before another long pause. "I found out when I was with my mom for a weekend a long time ago. I heard her talking to a friend and she was explaining how she got divorced so quickly and how it was because he" making air quotes "_overreacted_ to her making one _little_ mistake." the words coming out dryly as if she was discussing the weather.

"She said that _in front of you?_" Kate asks incredulously.

Devoid of emotion, Alexis nods. "The other woman pointed at me playing on the floor and my mom said something like 'Oh she's too young to understand.' and went right on talking about it." It wasn't until a few years later that I finally understood everything that had been said and I pieced together what _it_ was that she did and how little remorse she had about it or what it did to the family."

"Which no doubt is one of many reasons why my past actions sent up so many flares for you." Kate whispers in realization.

"Yes." is all the girl says.

"Just so you know. When your dad told me about what happened, he said he could forgive her for what she did to him."

"_Really?_" Alexis says pulling back a little, more than a bit shocked.

Kate explains "Yes. He says what hurt him was what she did to his child and his mother." Wrapping her arm tighter around the young girl's shoulder Kate tries to comfort her. "Alexis, I'm sorry for a lot of things. That you had to find out like that. That she did such a thing to you. That she caused you to doubt your father. I'm also sorry that _I_ hurt him _and_ you. That I made you doubt my devotion. I'm sorry that I was careless and harsh. That I was self-absorbed and blind to the needs of those around me. All of those things shouldn't have happened to you."

Again, in a faint whisper, Alexis opens up a little more "See, even that. I don't think my mom has ever apologized to me with that much sincerity or understanding. I love her-"

"You should." Kate adds quickly.

"But I don't always think of myself as having two parents. I was joking with Paige once and I commented it was more like having one parent all the time and institutional visitation rights to a crazy aunt." she says with a touch of humor.

Kate shares the laugh but files away a thought in the back of her mind to have an earnest chat with Meredith about maternal things next time she sees her.

"Crazy aunts can be fun too." Kate says trying to lighten the mood.

"You think so?" Alexis challenges.

"Yeah... I think so... I guess." Kate says pausing to think and smiling recalling some of her whacky relatives.

"Hmm... I have four simple words for you." Alexis says fixing a stare at the detective and snapping up a finger enumerating each word "When. I. Had. Mono."

"Ouch! _Oh._ Hmmm... Point taken. No contest. You win that argument."

"Thought so."

"See, right there." Kate points out "That's a perfect example. You _are_ his kid."

Smiling Alexis responds with a gentle shoulder bump back to Kate.

"I would like to get something out in the open between us." Kate says as a swarm of butterflies invade her insides. "Because we depend on things _not_ said so much, we miss some of the obvious things and I am trying to keep some of that from happening."

"Okaaay." Alexis says as if she's bracing herself.

Kate turns very serious taking the girls hand in her's. "No matter what, I do _not_, _**ever**__,_ expect to try and take the place of, or step into any role as a mother figure to you. You already have two, you don't need a third. However I _would_ like to be able to think of you as the younger sister I never had. If you _ever_ think or feel that I've overstepped any boundaries, I ask and _expect_ you to let me know _right_ away."

"Two?" she asks confused then "Oh, Grams." she says smiling. "That's so sweet of you to say. You're the first person to even _bother_ to mention it. Thank you." The young girl says. "You're right, we read the subtext, sometimes too much and also sometimes better than we read the text itself. I'm glad we're clearing these things up." Then after a pause "I like that idea and it does seem like a good fit. You're a cool sister to have."

Blushing bright crimson, "Thanks kid. You're a cool sister to have too."

"We'll have to tell dad about this revelation, then tell him you're going to teach me to ride your bike so that I can borrow it." Alexis says with a mischievous grin.

"You'd _so_ totally rock a black leather bike jacket. Maybe we should go shopping for one and use that as a reason to tell him. Of course, you _do_ know it won't happen. You've got to work your way up to a bike like mine and I'm not sure either one of us could take his reaction to seeing you actually driving it."

"I know, but it'll be funny to see him sweat over it." the girl says grinning.

Smiling Kate hits on an idea "If you really want to see something funny, we'd have to do it in front of _my_ dad. I put him through _hell_ when I got my bike. I'm sure he'd have a few words of wisdom for _your_ dad that will make him freak out even more." After thinking for a second she asks "Is this even nice to be plotting? It sort of _is_ cruel and unusual punishment for him."

Alexis smiles at the question and agrees "You're right but we're just going to have to set it up and wait until he deserves it. He will soon enough." then after a moment of quiet between them she adds "Y'know Kate, he really _does_ enjoy the contest and game of being gotten the better of. There's very few people who can get the upper hand with him. The three of us are pretty close to the only ones. The game and pursuit of verbal fencing is something he loves. I think that it is one of the first things he noticed about you, that you weren't intimidated by his verbal skills and you were up to the challenge to give it back to him. It's also good practice for us, we've got to stay on our toes around him. If you ever think we're being overly mean to him, just think of Grams."

"Martha? What about her?" Kate asks confused.

Alexis smiles at the irony of the situation and explains "You _know_ he made her crazy with _his_ antics growing up. Grams would say that my doing these things to him would just be his karma returning the favor."

"Ah... That would make sense. I suppose if we were doing it to serve the greater good then there's no harm in our skewering him occasionally." Kate laughs. "Hey, public service is my life."

The two share a laugh over the idea.

Kate thinks for a moment and timidly asks "Did he... really say that?"

"You mean that it was what he noticed first?" Smiling at the slight reversal of roles Alexis fills her in on a different view of things. "Yes. Some directly, some in the usual subtext. I don't think I'm breaking any confidences when I say that it was pretty obvious right away that you weren't like anyone else he'd ever dealt with before. He's been around smart, strong and confident women all his life. Gina and Paula are just two examples. His conversations about you were... I suppose in some ways he spoke of you with a form of awe. Some of which was for your looks of course, after all he _is_ a guy." she says laughing at the obviousness of the statement. "However, unlike the usual discussions about the women he meets there was recognition and I think respect for your intellect and I think that for the first time we heard about the spirit or heart that made up this woman he was always talking about. He _never_ failed to tell us when you were able to put him in his place. He also never failed to tell us when you were extraordinary which was most of the time he talked about you."

"Wow." Kate says quietly. "I feel like I'm in exceptional company. It's obvious that his world revolves around you and your grandmother."

"And you too. I told you a long time ago and I know Doctor Parish has too. You're well under his skin. When he thinks of his family you're part of it. Um..." she trails off in thought for a moment "Can I ask you something?" the girl asks timidly.

Without hesitating, Kate puts her hand on the girls forearm and tells her seriously "Of course you can but I want to make something else _absolutely clear_ first. Alexis, as far as I'm concerned, you _never_ have to ask me for permission. You have an open license on me. Just remember that I may not be as practiced at answering the tough questions as either of us would like. If you don't like an answer, you also have permission to call shenanigans and not let me get away with sidestepping it."

"Fair enough and thank you very much." Alexis says. Looking pensive and fiddling with the seam of her pant-leg she hesitantly tells her. "You can tell me if this is none of my business but..."

The seasoned and tough detective waits for the young girl to ask her question, her heartbeat quickening each moment that goes by as her terror mounts.

After a long pause, Alexis, suddenly seeming more a child than the wise and insightful women she was only a moment ago whispers "Kate?" Still fiddling with the seam of her jeans "Is it..." she pauses "Is it true?" then after a long silence she finally asks "Do the songs _really_ make sense?"

Barely hesitating even a beat, Kate smiles and nods her head enthusiastically saying "Yes, they really really do."

"Did they ever before?" the girl whispers again.

Kate whispers back with a sheepish grin on her face "I thought so once or twice but I now see just _how_ wrong I was. Now even the ones that _never_ made sense do. Oh, and the poems, paintings and stories too. Even some of the movies."

Smiling, the girl asks "Was it... you know, immediate or does it grow?"

"A little of both." she says still grinning "Some of it I never noticed until recently and some of it sort of grew and grew like it was getting louder and I began to notice little things that even though they were familiar I was noticing that they were different. I once watched this silly chick-flick with Lanie. I couldn't stand it. It was the same old thing '_Oh I can't live without you!_' and I just kept thinking 'Yeah yeah lady, get on with it.' Lanie used to tease me about it."

"And now?" Alexis asks confused and unsure.

"I saw it about a month ago. Your dad was on that trip to the Midwest for a few days and I crashed on the couch at my home and was eating popcorn and didn't want to get up to change the channel when that same chick-flick came on." Kate says while the color begins to rise to her face.

"Annnddd?" Alexis prompts dragging out the request.

Leaning in closer and whispering behind her hand Kate discloses "I bawled my eyes out over it! I was a puddle by the end of the movie!" with a big smile and a twinkle in her eyes.

Smiling, the girl puts her hand on the woman's arm and quietly confesses "I'm glad he has you. I don't think I've ever seen him this happy."

"One more secret for you." Kate says leaning in so they're shoulder to shoulder then whispers "I'm glad he's got me too. Not that it doesn't scare the bejeezus out of me though. You repeat any of that and the next laser tag game will end _very _differently than you're used to..." she trails off smiling knowing that teasing or not, she and Alexis are having a moment. Private unto themselves and the girl wouldn't violate the imaginary walls around them now. Still whispering she confides in the girl "I've only said those words to a couple of people in my life and it has had me terrified to tell your dad. Then when the moment came, it was natural and right and... easy."

"I'm very glad, for both of you." Alexis says.

Sniffling and wiping her eyes, Kate deflects the emotions "We _have_ to invest in some waterproof mascara."

"I know right?" the girl agrees. "We cry too much." she says laughing. "You know what we should..."

She's interrupted by the ringing of the house phone. Kate schooling her emotions offers "Why don't I answer it so you can get started on your homework."

"Okay Kate. Thanks! And thanks for the talk." the girl says as she heads up the stairs and Kate gets up and answers the phone. "Hello?" she says pleasantly.

_**"Who the **__**hell**__** is this?"**_ the voice barks.

"You wanna try that again?" Kate barks back.

"Martha is that you? Where the _hell_ is Ricky?" the voice commands again.

"This _isn't_ Martha and I'm _sure as hell_ not answering you until you identify yourself."

"_This_ is _Gina Cowell_, who the _hell_ are you?" she says pissed off and not realizing who is obviously on the other end of the phone.

"I'll see that and raise you. This is _Detective_ Kate Beckett, NYPD. Now, what do you want?" she says calmly and thoroughly nonplussed, without the slightest hint of concern for who the other woman is and snickering internally at the well-played poker reference.

"I want to talk to Ricky. He left me a message earlier and I want to know what the hell he's talking about. He's not answering his cell." She says still barking.

Calmly and gently Kate explains "You're right, he's not. His phone got broken. However that wouldn't matter at the moment since _Richard_ is unavailable." Kate says stressing the more formal name. Now using her _serious_ voice, Kate then tells her "Gina, you might want to do yourself a _big_ favor and take a couple of deep breaths before you say anything else."

She can hear the furious breathing on the other end of the phone. Gina is livid. She can hear her throw something fluttering across the room. Probably a book or notepad or such. There's a pause then Gina takes that deep breath and turns off the bitch switch. "Okay. Okay, I'm sorry. Kate, I... I'm sorry. Can we please start over?"

"I'm game." Kate says, then she clears her throat "Hello?" she says waiting.

"Thank you Kate. This is Gina. Rick left me a message earlier that there's been some last minute changes to the last couple of chapters that he'd sent me. I'd like to talk to him about it if that is possible." Gina says, probably doing that thing where her butt is flexing and crunching up the chair she's sitting in.

"Hi Gina." Kate says greeting her pleasantly. "I'm sorry, Rick kicked us out of his office a little while ago. He said he's made a story course correction that his readers are going to love and he sat right down to work on it. He hasn't come up for air since. If you asked for me to take a wild guess, I'd suspect that by the way he was writing he might even have those two chapters along with subsequent ones ready for you much sooner than he normally would."

"Okay, thank you. You said his phone got broken? How did that happen, anything serious?" The woman asks all business and pleasant but Kate knows there's a green-eyed Hydra on the other end of the phone.

Smiling knowingly at the attitude change, Kate explains "Alexis and Rick are alright, no one got injured or anything. I suspect Paula will be giving you all the details but the short version of it is, he and Alexis were confronted by one of those stalkerazzi and he dropped his phone breaking it."

"Oh Christ! Do we know who this guy is?" the woman asks panicking.

"Relax Gina. It's all been taken care of. I don't know what the protocol is for who tells what to whom so if you don't mind I'd really rather defer to Rick when he becomes available again or to Paula who I know has been given the details. However, I _can_ tell you that his name is Archibald Bunker-"

"Seriously?" Gina asks disbelievingly. "What happened to him?"

"He ah... he didn't comply with police orders to stop interfering with police business and filming them and move on so he ended up getting arrested." Kate explains.

"Arrested?"

"Yes Gina. _Arrested_." Kate says smiling wondering what sort of things are going through the woman's mind.

"Arrested." Gina says very softly, mostly to herself. "But Rick's alright?" she asks suddenly regaining her mental footing.

"_Yes! Alexis is fine._ Thank you _so_ much for asking!" Kate says with mock empathetic voice "She _was_ a bit shook up and hurt by some of the things this guy said but she's doing much better now." making sure to stress the importance of the girl before her father. "Oh yeah and Rick's okay too, he was pissed off in a major way as you can imagine. He called Paula as soon as he got home. I haven't seen him this mad in a long time." she explains leaving the statements and possible questions open-ended for Gina to pick up on.

"Excuse me please for one moment Kate." Gina says as she takes the phone away from her mouth. Kate thinking to herself "I _already_ did." with an inward smirk. Kate can hear the conversation with someone in her office "She's on the line now? Okay, give me one minute, I'm talking to Rick... Rick's house right now and then I can talk to Paula." she hears what she thinks is an acknowledgement and Gina comes back on the phone "Sorry about that Kate. Paula's calling me now. I'll talk to her and get the details. Would you please ask Rick to call me when he is free for a couple of minutes and can fill me in?" she asks 'nice as pie'.

"Sure Gina, I'll be glad to make sure he gets the message as soon as he leaves his office again." Kate says pleasantly.

"Thank you Kate. I'd better go talk to Paula. Thank you for... letting me start over again." Gina says with just a hint of the sound of her teeth grinding at being put in her place.

"Okay Gina and you're welcome. Good bye." Kate says as she hangs up the phone not even aware of the wry smile she's wearing.

Just as the phone settles into the cradle, the doorbell rings. "What is it with this place today? Grand central has less drama and activity." she mumbles to herself. Opening the door there's a man wearing a cell-phone company shirt and holding a phone box and a manilla folder. "Hi" he says. "I'm Stewart the manager of the store. Is Mister or Miss Castle available?"

"Hi Stewart, I'm Kate, can I sign for that?" she says pleasantly.

Opening the manilla folder he looks then kindly responds "No, I'm sorry ma'am. The only people authorized are Mister or Miss Castle or Mrs Rogers."

"Okay Stewart, please wait here, I'll close the door for a moment and get one of them and be right back." Kate says politely.

"Thank you ma'am... I'm sorry. Thank you Kate." the man says backing up from the doorway indicating she can close the door and it won't be 'in his face'.

Kate closes the door and walks briskly to the stairs and climbs to Alexis' room. Knocking on the door gently she calls out "Alexis? Are you free for a moment?"

"Come on in Kate." she hears.

"Hi Alexis." She says poking her head into the room. "There's a man named Stewart at the front door, I think he's from your father's phone supplier. I can't sign for the package." she says from the doorway.

"Oh okay!" she says getting up and throwing her red hair back from her face. "He must have dad's replacement phone."

As the two descend the stairs Kate tells her "That phone call was Gina. She seemed to have a hair across... a hair out of place about your dad leaving a message that he was rewriting a couple of chapters he'd sent her."

"I am _sure_ she did Kate. Hey, next time that happens, can I listen in? I'd love to be a fly on the wall for one of those conversations." Alexis says laughing as they reach the door.

Swinging it open Alexis greets the man "Stewart! Long time no see. How are you? Please, come in."

"Thanks Miss Castle. Yes, it has been quite a while. How is school treating you?"

"Fine, thank you. I'm always amazed at how much crap they can give us for homework." she says pleasantly. "Stewart, this is Detective Kate Beckett, she's okay. I'm sure my dad will be putting her on the list soon enough."

"Hello Miss... Detective Beckett." He says extending a hand to her to shake.

"Hi Stewart, Kate is fine thank you." she says exchanging greetings. "Alexis, do you need your father's broken phone?"

"Yes, I'll go get it in a second." Alexis offers.

"No, you do this paperwork with Stewart and I'll go fetch the old one from him." Kate says already heading for the office.

"Okay, thanks." then turning to the man "Stewart, what do I need to sign." Kate hears as she opens the door to the office and quietly steps in.

Rick still has his feet up in his 'writing pose' and is typing away furiously. She notices that he's wearing a big smile for a change, not the usual dead-pan face he has when working. She sneaks around his desk and finds the phone sitting next to his leg. Without disturbing him she takes it and heads back to the door, closing it quietly behind her.

"Still in la-la land Kate?" Alexis asks.

"He is." Kate laughs back "And he's smiling like a Cheshire cat at something."

"Oh he must be having a great time." the girl observes. "He doesn't do that often but when he does, the results can be amazing. More amazing than usual."

"Well, I hope so. Here's his phone Alexis." Kate says handing it to her.

The girl reads the serial number off of the back of the phone out loud to Stewart and they both confirm they have the correct unit. Stewart puts it in a plastic baggie and then into his pocket. "I'll have it shredded as soon as I get back to the office." he says.

"Thank you." Alexis says taking the new phone out of the box and handing it to Kate. "This is his replacement. I'll put it on the charger and turn it on so it can sync to the cloud and restore itself from the backups."

"Sign here Miss Castle" he says pointing to the form "and the exchange will be finished."

She signs the form, hands her a copy and, shaking their hands heads for the door "Thanks again Miss Castle. Nice meeting you Detective Beckett." he says graciously as he exits the loft closing the door behind him.

"Do we need to do anything other than turn it on for the re-sync to occur?" Kate asks Alexis.

"Tell you what, let me start it now." Alexis says turning on the phone and going through the motions to begin the process. "It will need to be on a charger now."

"Okay, I'll plug it in over there" Kate says motioning to the couch "I've got some stuff of my own to do and I'll answer it if it rings to keep from disturbing him."

"Great idea. Okay. If that's the case, I'm going to go finish my work myself." Alexis says heading for the stairs. "I figure I'll be heading back in an hour or so."

"If he" Kate says pointing to his office door "hasn't come crawling out of his cave by then, I'll take you back if you don't mind." Quickly holding up her hand as the girl opens her mouth to speak Kate explains "Before you tell me what we _already_ know, I'm only doing it so _he_ doesn't get freaked out and try to call out the National Guard to find and protect you."

"Good point. Okay, that seems reasonable. I'll call for a car when we're ready to leave." Making the same halting motion to Kate "I know. Here again, I'm only doing it as a concession to him so we don't have to listen to him next time." she says smiling.

"You're a wise lady there Alexis Castle." she says humorously. "Now scoot. I'm going to do my work too." Kate says with a wink as she turns and plugs the phone into the charger.


	18. Little Missy my ass!

"Gift from Beyond"  
**Chapter 17**  
Little Missy my ass!

* * *

Quietly opening the door to his office, Kate peeks in and sees that he's in the same position as before, still typing away madly but now he's giving little chuckles periodically as he types along. Trying to not distract him, she puts the date book and notepad she was looking at earlier back into the briefcase and takes it, still open, out the door nudging it closed with her butt.

"I wonder how long until he runs out of steam. The _one_ thing I'd like to have a pool on there's no one to bet with. Just my luck." she thinks to herself putting the case down on the coffee table next to the explosion of flowers and parks herself on the couch in front of them.

As she reaches for the note pad she takes a deep breath of the flowers and smiles warmly at what they mean. Pulling out the note pad she turns to a blank page. "Okay Detective Beckett." she says to herself humorously "Time to see if you can figure out _this_ puzzle. Take off your modesty hat and be honest." She begins to write some of the things she does, both likes and dislikes. "So, let's see, I'll do the easy part first." she says to herself she makes a heading that says _"I like:"_ and then begins to list off the things about her current job that brings her pleasure...

I like:  
- Working with Castle. (!) (Caskett!) #1!  
- Bringing closure to victim's families  
- Bringing criminals to justice.  
- Cracking a suspect in the box.  
- Working as part of a team.  
- Working with MY team.  
- A chance to arrest "him"  
- Being friends with my team. - camaraderie.  
- Being his muse and inspiration.  
- Helping other cops improve and move up.  
- The power and some of the prestige. (Castle will bust my chops on this one.)  
- Possibly being one of the best there is.  
- Being BAB (Bad-Ass Beckett)

"Now the stuff I don't like about what I do now:" she mumbles as she writes.

I don't like:  
- Putting Castle in danger.  
- The angst/worry I cause my dad.  
- The angst/worry I cause Castle's family.  
- Getting called at ridiculous hours of the night or in the middle of... stuff.  
- People lying to me.  
- Long hours. - Unable to come home at a reasonable hour for dinner with family, etc.  
- Not enough sleep.  
- Getting shot at.  
- Shooting someone and/or taking a life.  
- Putting me and/or my team in danger.  
- Hard to be the boss and their friend.  
- Giving team a difficult order.  
- Watching the bad guy walk.  
- Not catching the bad guy.  
- Not having a life. - Not having a life with the Castles  
- Stress  
- Politics, public and police.  
- People/friends I work with getting retired or injured and leaving. (Or KIA RIP Roy M)  
- Bad press for legitimate actions.  
- Wet feet from New York rain storms.  
- Sore feet.  
- FOOT CHASES!  
- Paperwork. (I know Castle, shut up.)  
- Blood and guts all the time.  
- Seeing what people can do to each other.  
- People that don't care.  
- Hiding relationship w/Castle.  
- Sneaking around.  
- Unable to have PDAs  
- His disappointment at not being able to tell everyone about us.  
- My disappointment too.

"Now, if I'm to guess at what the new job will give me:" she says as she writes the heading on the page.

New job:  
- Less chance of Castle getting hurt or...  
- Less danger.  
- My dad won't have to worry. (But he will.)  
- Maybe able to help get more bad guys off the street.  
- Prestige and Power (Zip-it Castle!)  
- Lack of stress.  
- Will have more time to be with Castle/Family. (Wow, funny to read!)  
- Can be public about relationship.  
- Doesn't rule out being able to pursue "him" and solve case.  
- Might still be able to be B-A-B.  
- Might still be the best.

"I wish I'd thought it out better. I'll have to rearrange these later." she thinks looking at the lists. "I wonder what Castle's going to add." her inner voice says.

As she reviews her lists, she thinks of all the things that have gone on in her life. Smiling warmly looking at the big bouquet of flowers that fill the room with their perfume she engages in a silent one-sided conversation with her mother. "So Mom did you ever think Richard Castle would write a character that is _better_ than Derrick Storm and base it on _your_ little girl?" Closing her eyes and settling back into the couch the thought occurs to her "What a remarkable journey this has been so far."

She remembers back to her decision to follow in her parent's footsteps and go to law school. How happy they were that she would be continuing on their field. Smiling now, she remembers telling her mother how she finally felt so at home in college and how she made so many new friends only to have her mother repeat her favorite mantra "I told you so." Her mother's voice still clear and happy in her memories, making her smile at the sound and warmth it gives her.

Those days were some of the happiest she has known. She thinks about ice skating with her mom. Those cold days, wrapped in a warm scarf, laughing and joking. Going for hot chocolate afterwards. Suddenly she feels like she got a punch in her gut, she hears her mother's voice clear and loud when she said "Remember Katie, this is what we live for. One day _you'll_ get to do it with _your_ child." The memory fresh as the day it happened. She begins to cry again. "Alexis is right, we _have_ to do something about this mascara." she says out loud to no one. She gives a silent prayer for her mother and offers an apology to her "I'm so sorry Mom. I'm sorry that you'll never get to meet your grandchild and spoil them the way they deserve. I'm sorry for me too. I miss your wisdom, laughter and hugs."

She remembers that back then they were a family. Ice skating in the winter. Tickets to opening day at Yankee stadium. Trips upstate in the fall to drink in the changing foliage. Eating dinner together as a family. Talking about the news or what was going on in their lives.

She closes her eyes and automatically thinks back to that cold horrible day in January when they got the news. How numb she turned. The months that followed were blank. There are no memories, only empty aches and pain of wishes and memories and loneliness. It all went by in a blur. A young girl left alone to become an adult abruptly. She had no time to mourn. She had to become stronger as she watched the strongest, smartest and wisest man she'd ever known or loved, her rock of stability and security, now her only parent. She watched him melt into a puddle of hurt and pain trying to drown his sorrows in a bottle because of the loss of his soul-mate, his "One and done."

She remembers vividly how she wanted to find whoever stole her mother from her and make them pay. She knew that using the law was how to achieve that goal. "Truth conquers all" was her mother's fervent belief that became her epitaph and legacy of faith. That faith in the truth never seemed to wavier. She remembers how she never told anyone her plan, she just transferred to a new school and decided to become a cop. She vowed to make a difference and to keep anyone else from having to live through the pain her and her father live with.

She remembers how terrified she was when she first approached a cop about it, how he laughed at this wisp of a girl for her crazy notion of becoming a cop. "You mean you want to become a meter-maid. Just go down to city hall, they have forms and tests for you there girly."

"_No sir._ A real cop so that I can become a homicide detective." she answered back with a steely reserve she'd not known she had.

Taken aback a bit, he still smirked. "Sure, you can try. Go into the station and ask the sergeant at the front desk for the forms, he'll give you everything you'll need. Just don't get your hopes up there little Missy."

Getting up from her seat now she smiles wide and heads to the kitchen for another cup of coffee for herself. She wishes she remembers who that cop was, she'd love to get in his face. "The youngest woman ever to make the grade of Detective. _Ha!_ Little Missy my ass! I'd like to give you a little Missy right upside your head you jack-ass." she thinks semi-humorously.

A memory bubbles up taking her by surprise. She remembers herself, standing in front of a full length mirror, dressed only in her underwear. Stripped bare, just her. Assessing what she looked like and thinking that despite her lithe figure and youth, _she was going to make this happen!_

Now pouring her coffee she remembers that young girl and how she seems like someone else, as if she's having an 'out of body' experience and looking at a stranger. "Wow, how far I've come." she thinks with a crooked smile.

The memories come flooding back of her first days at the academy and the constant fear that she was in over her head. The terror that permeated her when she was dressed down in front of everyone at the academy by a superior over a simple mistake. How she held it together, her head held high for the rest of the day and then how she hid in the bathroom in the early morning hours all alone in a corner crying her eyes out where no one could catch her.

"Oh god." she says to herself as she remembers her first day in training for hand to hand combat and how bruised, beaten and exhausted she was. That first moment when the instructor who she'd never even shook hands with, dove for her knocking her down and capturing her in a head-lock. She realizes that she now knows the term for her discomfort, "Personal space."

This man was also the first one to comment to her about recognizing how determined and driven she was. No matter how beaten she'd been, she never gave up. She came back for more and learned. She learned the lessons through tears, blood, sweat and brains and never made the same mistake a third time. The other instructor, a woman, taught her how to use her size, speed, brains and looks as weapons. She taught her that she'll never beat a man in an arm-wrestling contest but properly distracted he turns to putty. She also explained the mechanics of how her body, despite being smaller and weaker than a man's can, with the right leverage, take down the biggest opponent. "What was that saying she had?" Kate thinks to herself. "Oh yea '_Only your head can keep your ass out of trouble.'_" Making her smile at the memory. Mumbling to herself she says "Maybe I should stitch that on a pillow." with a happy smile.

Walking back into the living room, taking a draw from the fresh coffee, she remembers the first time she held a pistol. The strange feelings that went with it. The first time that she realized that she held in her hands the power over life and death. The intimidating feeling that came with it and the awesome sense of responsibility she felt. She recalls when it hit her, standing in the pistol range, looking at this instrument she held. When she realized that she had, in her hands, the same power that "he" held in _his_ hands when he stole her mother's life, taking everything from her and her father.

She remembers the emotion when she realized that the difference between "him" and her was that she knew it was a power to be used _only_ as a last resort and that she could use that power to protect others from the truly wicked. She can hear Castle saying it now "Use this power only for good." making her laugh out loud in the empty room prompting her to look around embarrassed.

Looking out the windows at the waning day, she remembers the day she graduated from the academy. Proud and strong, she was now a Police Officer. Sworn guardian of the weak. Upholder of the law. Voice of the victims. She stood on the wall to prevent evil from passing. She smiled like all the other graduates at the ceremony until she found a chance to sneak away and hide under a stairway where no one would find her. She cried. She cried hard. The sobs wracking her body and soul. One of the happiest and proudest days of her life and she was a bawling mess. She was suddenly that little girl again who wanted to show her mommy what she'd accomplished and be hugged as only a mother can but all she had was an aching emptiness. She didn't even have her father to be proud of her. Unable to dry out long enough to see his only child graduate he wasn't there. It would still be many years before he will be able to pull himself out of the bottle.

Then there was that pain-in-the-ass, larger-than-life training officer she had that put her through hell but taught her what it meant to be a cop. The book said _"You walk the streets making sure your uniform is crisp and clean."_ He taught her that the person _inside_ that uniform had to be _just_ as crisp and clean. The book said _"To engage people you pass and be friendly. Chat with the members of the community."_ Her T.O. taught her that you have to be friendly but also be a presence they can sense without seeing you. Visit the local stores and laugh and joke with the neighbors but make sure _they_ see _you_ checking out their hands and pockets and feet and eyes. Let them know that _everyone_ is under scrutiny and you will let no one get away with causing trouble while you're there. The book says _"To chat with children and let them know you're a friend."_ Mike made sure every kid in his beat knew his name and he knew theirs. Even the little kids, "Are you eating your veggies?", "Stick up for your brother.", "Take care of your sister." and "Don't talk back to your mother!" To help these kids, he had to help them learn the responsibility of authority, and to help them be better people. Officer Mike Royce gave her the tools to do a job that very few people _want_ to do and even fewer _can_ do. His legacy will live on with her. She'll help protect it.

She lets out a loud sigh as she remembers when she found out how to get into the records archives. Then the memories start to come faster. She remembers the first time she opened the folder with the handwritten label "Beckett, Johanna." That was when she first learned to separate herself from the body in those pictures. How she learned to not think of it as the loving wife and mother who gave her life and joy but to think of her as the one whom she spoke for. This was her epiphany. She, Katherine Beckett, would speak for this woman who died in an alley surrounded by trash. This would be her purpose, her driving force, to be _her_ voice and to bring her killer to justice.

Again, another memory percolates up. It was in this dark and dank room where she met Roy Montgomery for the first time. What was it that he said? "We speak for the dead. We're all that they have left when the wicked rob them of their voices." A man who willingly forfeited his life for her's to atone for his past mistakes. He found a place and took a stand between her and evil and he wouldn't back down. She wonders what her old boss and mentor would think of all that has gone on in her life for the past few days and the choices in front of her. She can almost hear his voice "Beckett, you're a big girl, you'll have to make up your own mind. Just don't forget to have some fun too."

That voice of his. She shakes her head at the memory. She can _still_ hear how it echoed in the records room. _"What the hell are you doing in here rookie?"_ he yelled at her, this green street cop, sitting on a small footstool in the dark reading a cold case file as the batteries in her flashlight slowly gave way, producing an orange hue.

"Reading a cold case file sir!" she said jumping to attention with her heart in her throat.

"_What file and what the hell for?_" he snapped, seeming to get even angrier.

She faced him with cold steel in her eyes and a fire in her heart that was born of the deepest pain and suffering and without the slightest hesitation she told him in a loud and strong voice "It is my _mother's_ case. It is about _her_ murder. It's the reason I'm here. It's the reason I became a cop. _Sir._"

That was the beginning of a great friendship. Little did she know the depth of their connection but he treated her as a special project to help her learn and grow. With his help and guidance she grew to be one of the best homicide detectives there was.

Vividly she recalls how it _still_ wasn't enough. For three long years, she lived every day to find the missing piece of that file and to solve the case. It was all she had. Her father had run out of tears and was still drowning in the bottle, the sorrow and pain too much for him to face. She can remember distinctly the moment she realized that she was, just as he was, _addicted_, unable to function without her fix.

That late night, all alone in her spartan little apartment, just her and her ghosts. No decorations beyond the minimum needed, mostly for functional purposes. That was when it hit her. She was following her father into a black hole with a good chance she'd never come out.

The memories of that time play out for her like a movie. Vividly she can still see how she stood up in her barren living room, looked around and decided that it was time. She reached down to the table in front of her, flipped the folder closed and decided that she had to stop and claw her way back out of the darkness to the land of the living. With a heavy heart, she went to her mother. There in the cemetery, holding tight to her mother's ring around her neck, kneeling in the grass graveside, she cried and apologized for having to give up the chase. She promised her mom that she would honor her memory and fight for those who didn't have a voice. She also promised that she'd try again when she was stronger. "Maybe one day I'll find someone I can trust enough to share this with and to lean on who can keep me from spiraling down the rabbit hole again." she said to the cold grave marker. It seems so long ago but the memory is still as crisp as the moment it happened. She vividly remembers how as she stood and turned to walk away, she imagined she could feel the weight of her mother's disappointed gaze on her back and she cried even harder as she walked out of this haven for the dead and back into the city and to the world of the living.

She headed to her paren... _father's_ home to check on him. He was there, still alive thankfully but barely, sprawled across a chair in the living room, snoring, filthy, smelly and unkempt. Probably sleeping off another binge she decided. She went into their room and sat on her mother's side of the bed and looked around at the last tangible signs of the woman who had lived here. The picture of her and her mother putting on their ice-skates and smiling brilliantly sat there on the nightstand still. Surrounding it were the nick-knacks that her mother had collected over the years. That Derick Storm novel she was reading before... before it happened. Her mother enjoyed those books because she found so much comfort and hope in them. She had said Katie could read it when she was done with it. Kate can remember as if it was yesterday how she stood, took the book, tucked it under her arm and left.

The memories still crisp, she recalls how that night, in the silent darkness of her home, the memory of the feeling of having disappointed her mother still weighing on her shoulders she tried to distract herself. She opened that book. She could smell her mother's perfume and scent in the pages, preserved because it had never been opened since she last read it. Like a warm embrace from her mom, the scent held her there while she began to read this book. By the time the scent had faded from her senses, she was firmly gripped in this make-believe world of this detective.

From then on, she could be found reading one of two books regularly. Her police procedures manual to improve herself and make that leap to detective or one of those series of books about Storm. She still read her Russian literature and plays and the classic works she adored but she only carried these two books with her. They were constant companions. When she didn't push forward with the police rules, she escaped with Derrick Storm, her faithful friend who never disappointed her, to a world where good always triumphed over evil and justice was always served. It was never sugar-coated, people died, got injured and some lost and some won but it was always good that came out on top. It gave her hope, it helped her not fall deeper into the darkness trying to consume her.

Grinning like a fool now, she steals a glance at the office door and visualizes the man behind it, thinking "First of the many times you saved my life."

Back then, it was her only other friend, the new medical examiner, Dr Lanie Parish, that gave her the name of a therapist to call. After a year of therapy and a lot of sleepless nights she finally had the first day that she didn't _have_ to open that file and get her fix. She still read those books to escape the real world but it was getting less and less that she _needed_ them to survive, she was now reading them because she _enjoyed_ the places they took her.

Now, sitting on the couch, she smiles and thinks "I'm going to have to share more of this with Rick." She looks around her and thinks "How 'bout this Mom. Here I am, sitting in living room of _Richard Castle_, 'The Master of the Macabre'. When you looked at his picture on the back of those books would you have believed that the Millionaire Playboy and darling of 'Page 6', the man with a ready pen for any boob presented to him, would change his ways and he'd pursue your little girl for four long years until she woke up and realized what he meant to her?" Blushing at the thought, she continues the silent conversation "Did you ever think to yourself 'Maybe he and Katie will meet and fall in love?' To tell you the truth Mom, I wouldn't have believed any of it until it happened. Now look!" As she wipes away a small tear of happiness she smiles thinking "Mom, I wish you could meet Rick, you'd love him. _He_ is the one who I trust enough to share our story with. He's let me lean on him when I needed it and he kept me from a downward spiral."


End file.
